Why do I often experience a sudden drop in emotion and inability to smile in social situations?

Question

Being social can be a real challenge for me. It's linked to a depression that I've been suffering from to a varying degree for the past few years. The worst experiences I have are those when I get a sudden inability to smile after having laughed and been in a good mood. This always happens as a result of becoming conscious of my own happiness. If I don't think it over I'll be fine, still enjoying the moment. It feels as if some part of me doesn't allow joy and happiness. This distorted consciousness comes to the surface once in a while to tell me; "hey, you're not supposed to be happy." The sudden decrease in emotion often leaves me in an unbearable social situation. While everyone around me is still laughing, I'm suddenly unable to smile at all, looking sad but struggling to look happy. If people see my face they will usually be affected and it often feels like I'm killing the mood of everyone around me. What can I do to cope better with this problem?

Answer 1

It sounds like you don't believe that you have the right to be happy or enjoy yourself. You need to convince yourself of the opposite. When you go out, think to yourself 'I am going out, I am going to enjoy myself just like everyone else because tonight I feel like being happy." Make a definite choice- "I want to have fun tonight."

It also sounds like you are concerned with 'keeping up appearances' in front of other people. Try to relax and just take it as it comes. Be real with yourself and others, and you wont feel so anxious all the time.