Why do I resent guys so much?

Question

When I was younger I was abused mentally and physically by guys older then me, it wasn't anyone from my family but boys around the neighborhood, I accidentally hit one of their friends when I was throwing a ball and it hit him in the back, they assumed it was on purpose and so they beat me up, they took stuff from me and that's how it all began, I had wounds and bruises and cuts my family wanted to know what was going on but I never said anything except lies like 'Playing with the guys! We got a little rough' Or 'Soccer'. I never told anyone I kept it in because I was so scared and alone... Then when I got older and moved away, it was the same sh-t, except no one hit me there it was all verbal, then I moved again and it was the same this time it was from girls and guys but the girls left me alone after awhile the guys kept on going... Calling me 'fatty' 'pizza face' 'stupid b---h' all the good stuff, they even stuffed things into my locker like twinkies and mean notes. I've never had a boyfriend, never kissed anyone, I'm not a L*****n but I don't want to go through this same, pointless stupid sh-t, I don't want to be around guys like that everytime they do this to me I feel as if I want to kill them, literally strangle them, chop them up, rip out there throats anything so I don't have to see the anymore... How can get through this and learn to ignore them and let things go? It's SO hard when you've been treated like sh-t all your life, I don't want to become agrressive and violent...

Answer 1

There are some guys out there that are complete *******. It sounds that you ran into one too many of those guys. Just don't let them bother you when it comes to verbal abuse. But when it comes to physical abuse, that's when it isn't right. Learn some ways to defend yourself like martial arts, and most importantly tell some one! If you keep it a secret those ******* are going to get away with it all the time.

There is an alternative way but not to many people take this path because they think that it is stupid.

This alternative way is to love them with your heart soul and mind.

Not in the couple type of love way but as a friend. Forgive them for all they have done and give them a true and meaningful hug.

I hope this helped. Take care.

By the way I'm being very serious about the last method. You'll be surprised about how good you will feel

Answer 2

I know how you feel. It's because you lie and don't talk about these issues with anyone is why you're depressed. Talking about how you don't like people will actually help you accept those people and not want to kill them.