Why do I try and find fault in my boyfriend?

Question

My boyfriend and I have had more than our fair share of issues, and recently I have been reading posts on the internet about signs of 'loser' boyfriends and potential abusive behaviour signs. I grew up with an abusive dad and thought I was pretty good at seeing these signs and vowing to myself not to get into that kind of relationship. However now I am questionning myself, and looking at the 'signs' written down has meant that I have been analysing my relationship, finding application for most. The thing is, I don't know if I am being too paranoid because of my childhood.

Any help would be great, Thanks :)

Answer 1

I think that what has happened in your childhood has seemed to have left you with scars that haven't gone away yet. Maybe you're just worried about what you're letting yourself in for because you're not ready yet. Is your boyfriend the one you want to spend your time with? Are you happy? If not, then that's probably why you're trying to find faults with him, so you can have an excuse to end the relationship.

Answer 2

Paranoia is a big thing in life especially when it comes from childhood experiences, you can't really judge signs of abuse from what you read it is more of a personal feeling, if you a feeling abused then it probably either means you are being abused or you are paranoid. go along with with the relationship but if you are feeling abused or mistreated then talk to your partner don't bottle the feeling up as it will only make it worst. talking truly does help.

hope it helped,

good luck.

Answer 3

I Agree with Vivian