Why do children pee in their pants at four years old?

Question

My four year old has been potty trained since she was one. She peed in her pants twice and I am worried. Any suggestions as to why she does this? I'm worried about her because this is not normal bahavior.

Answer 1

come on you people worry too much. just nothing, it will pass

Answer 2

First, she should be checked for a urinary tract infection.  If it is normal ask the doctor what he/she thinks.

Is there a new baby in the family?  Sometimes that causes children to regress.  If that's the case just give her extra attention and don't make anything over the "accidents"  She should change herself and clean up after herself.  She will probably rather the extra attention when she is dry.

Also, is there any chance that someone is touching her inappropriately?  Ask her if she has any secrets that someone told her not to tell you.  I hope this is not the reason, but it is something to rule out.

Good luck?  I hope you figure out what this unusual behavior for her is all about.

Answer 3

This is perfectly normal behaviour and nothing to worry about. She is obviously getting totally engrossed in what she is doing and forgets the body signals, once she acknowledges these signals it`s too late and she wets herself. She needs to be reminded to use the loo,especially when engrossed. Just a quiet word, be careful not to make an issue of it or embarrass her in front of her peers. Lots of praise when she`s dry and no fuss if she forgets. She will soon be back on track and listening to her body.

Answer 4

Take a look at your lives. What has changed? Is she starting a new school? Are her parents having problems? Was there a death in the family? Is there a new baby on the way? When a child who has been potty trained starts wetting herself purposely, it's usually either the result of stress or a call for attention.

*Remind her, often, about going to the bathroom.

*Give her control in other areas of her life - let her choose her clothes, let her choose dinner that night, etc.

*Talk with her about her feelings - find out if something has changed. Keep in mind, she's at the age where she'll start making friends and noticing others socially. Is she having trouble connecting? Is she upset with a friend?

*Make her days as routined as possible - try not to change aspects of her day too often or without warning.

Also, she's old enough that she can take a role in the clean up. If she has an accident, she can change her own pants, help clean up the floor, etc. She's old enough to take responsibility for that. Sometimes realizing that she's not going to have someone do it all for her (and therefore get all that direct attention) is enough to change the behavior.

The most important thing is to figure out why. Then you can know how to help her change it.

Answer 5

Maybe she has a bladder infection, or going through a phase that she doesn' t feel like going to the potty. You need to talk to her and ask if she is in pain, and if she says no tell her to use her words when she has to go potty. Tell her its okay to have accidents sometimes but, if they keep occuring she is gonna have to wear baby diapers. That would probably stop her.

Answer 6

Sometimes it can be because they are sick... not feeling well. or like a bladder infection.. sometimes they are just too busy or dont want to leave the fun activity they are playing, sometimes it can be because it is the only thing that they can control and they are trying to get a reaction, it can be because she is jealous or wants to get more attention like a younger sibling or relative that is a baby, or it can be because there is some sort of trauma or sexual play going on that should not be.......

Answer 7

I wouldn't be worried...

Children want to play..and sometimes wait too long...(their bladders are small)...before they go to the bathroom and can't hold it.

It could be an attention getter

Has their routine changed?

Anything going on?

Going to the bathroom is about the only thing that a young child has control over...and they feel like they have the power to choose when to go and not to go. Grown ups choose everything else for them.

Creat a sticker chart...every time they go on the toilet they get a sticker. When the chart is full at the end of the week..get an icecream or do something special together..like go to the park..etc...FIll a jar with marbles (one marble for each time they go to the bathroom..when finished do something special together/prize, etc...as child gets better...make container bigger and bigger..until child looses interest in it).

Explain to them that they are big. And big kids use the toilet..don't scold them...for having accidents. Ask them why they haven't been using the toilet...something might have happened....(fell in? toilet seat came down on them? scared of something in the bathroom? )

When an accident does occur. Have them change themselves. oops..you had an accident..here are your clothes..etc. (changing yourself...takes time..and is a lot of work...might get tired of it..rather play).

They might be having accidents because they want to wear something else...etc.

If you are feeling unsure still..have a dr check them out....bladder infection, urinary tract infection..are they red around their privates? are they sore?

Answer 8

Maybe she was trained too early. Most child development experts consider it  normal until the age of about 5 or 6 for an occasional accident.

Don't scold or embarrass your child when an accident happens.  If your child still isn't staying dry by age 5, consult his doctor.

Answer 9

It is normal behaviour for any small child even after beginning school they become too involvled in play or whatever they are doing  and just keep on with whatever they are doing. Lots of children do this so explain to her that she is going to become sore if she keeps wetting her pants.

Answer 10

she probably doesn't want to stop whatever activity she is engaged in and next thing you know - uh oh! or, did you stress her out and potty train her too early? she may be regressing from that.

Answer 11

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NORMAL.  And it's not "behavior".  It's simply they still are growing.  

I work in a daycare with 3-4-5 yr.olds and we have had several kids have accidents from time to time.  You don't make it a big deal about it, you don't punish her.  You just tell her honey don't be embarrassed, let's clean it up.  It's ok.

Try to not let her drink unlimited amounts of liquids at night.  She will grow out of it soon.  Stop worrying.  If you cause her anxiety about it, you could make it worse.

Kids this age know and are already embarassed about it.  So  she will correct it herself.

Answer 12

I like the answers from Kara and Jude.  So ditto, but also try not to be too alarmed.  See if there are other behaviors that have changed as well, like more crying, or sleeplessness.  If that is the case, there may be something else going on.  Otherwise, just try to work with her through this phase.  When I started a new and demanding activity in my life, my daughter expressed her displeasure the same way.  She was 5 at the time.  I found ways to spend more time with her and to give her more attention.  It went away instantly.  I hope that your daughter's problem will be resolved just as easily.  Best to ya both!

Answer 13

Babies aren't old enough to understand everything. Why do you excpect from a 4year old baby to behave maturely? Talk to her. Tell her what's your problem about being leaked.