Why do i ruin myself? please help me!

Question

i dont know why but i do things to upset myself like if i get a new shirt that looks good an me ill rip it up so i cant wear it or if i buy a book i love ill throw it in water and it will be unreadable even if i make myself a nice warm drink ill throw it down the drain before i even sip it, if i buy a nice makeup ill throw it on the floor and spread it everywhere so it cant be worn. its extremely impalsive! and i cant stop it. serously i try so hard not to do it but i cant. i feel like a mentel case, why do i do this? i just cant understand. i think ever since i gained alota weight and struggle so bad to get it off with little results for years this may be a factor. yes i seeked councelling!, but ive been on the waiting list for 5 months for a counceller and still many months left to wait!

Answer 1

First of all, you should see another counselor.

Also, all this self-sabotage may be a way that your body is trying to stop itself from going forward into something. THis often happens when someone is afraid of imminent change, or more likely, when they are over something like a bad relationship and dont want to move forward out of fear of getting hurt again. Your behavior usually is a sign of a situation similiar to what I just said.

Please seek more help and more importantly, PLEASE dont hurt yourself.

Hope this helped!

Answer 2

Why do you want to torture yourself?  Your body is your temple. Your not hurting anyone but yourself..Sounds like you are mad at yourself.. You have to accept who you are and do something positive to change yourself..Work on changing one thing at a time..

Answer 3

Go to a doctor. They can get you into a counselor right away.  

Answer 4

well if your fat, your punishing ur self for being fat obviously new shirt and u rip it up is cuz u dont feel you look attractive in it, you poor ur drink out cuz u prolly feel its gunna make you heavier, a movie prolly ruin it cuz what will you do while ur watching it sit down and eat somthin.