Why do married people say this?

Question

Married people are always telling me, "I wish I were single"; "If I were single, I would ...". It gets on my nerves. If they didn't want to be married and committed to someone, I feel they shouldn't have gotten married. I take offense to it because I feel like they're patronizing me and trying to make me feel better about being single again.

Answer 1

Marriage takes work, cooperation, and lots of compromise.  It's easy to call it quits and move on rather than to work out your differences.  Those that do enjoy a marriage that gets better with age.

Answer 2

People don't realize that marriage is hard work and if you are not willing to put in 100% you should stay single. People change and things change in a person life that make them believe that they may have been happier when they were single. Don't take the offense use what they are saying as a warning to not rush into marriage and enjoy being single while you are.

Answer 3

maybe there right tho lol

Answer 4

Because being single has its advantages. Unlike when your married, if you get really sick of someone, you can just get rid of them. When your married, you have to work it out. Plus, when your single, you don't have to check in with anyone, you have your own money so you can do whatever you want with it, and best of all, you can come home whenever you want, or not. You have much more freedom and options. That being said, I'm still happy that I'm married,  crazy as that sounds.

Answer 5

they probably are, but I would NEVER say that. I am very happy in my marriage and my wife is wonderful.

its just a matter of finding the right mate, and communication.

Answer 6

Many marry the wrong people for the wrong reasons.  

I love being married and I would not trade it for all the Chippendales men in the whole wide world.  

Answer 7

It might not be the way they truly feel. They may have moments when they're fighting with their spouse when they've thought this, and they pull on those feelings when they're trying to figure out what to say in response to your situation.

They may feel a bit awkward because they're not quite sure what to say to help or make anything better, so they try to empathize the best way they know how. It doesn't really mean they always feel that way.

If you feel like they're being insincere or patronizing, then next time the conversation steers toward your divorce (break up?) just change the subject. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. And if someone does slip another line like "if I were single" by you, just say politely, "Thanks for being so understanding, but I don't really want to talk about dating right now."

Answer 8

They say it because that is how they are feeling at the time.  Single people say they wish they were married and what they would do.  So it is like the saying the grass always looks greener on the other side.  Being single is hard and being married is hard and everyone needs to vent sometimes.

Answer 9

Get a life girl.  Do not dwell on what others say.

Answer 10

cause sometimes marriage isn;t all it is cracked up to be

,,

i am one of those people ,i can;t wait to be single again ,

Answer 11

It's probably a misguided attempt to make you feel better about being single. They don't realize that it actually makes you feel worse.  I had the same sort of problem when I was trying to get pregnant.  I had a lot of trouble getting pregnant, and needed help.  I had friends who were pregnant, and they'd be like, "I wasn't even *trying* to get pregnant...it just happened!"  I had one who actually said "We weren't planning to get pregnant for another year, so this really came as a surprise to us...I don't think we're ready...I cried for three days!"  I wanted to strangle them, but they thought that it would make me feel better if I thought they weren't happy in their position or something.  In reality, it would have made me feel better to think that they *were* trying, and *were* happy, and really appreciated being pregnant.

The only thing that I can say as a married woman, is there are good and bad aspects to being single, and good and bad aspects to being married.  You have to find the good in your situation and take advantage of it now. When I *was* single, I loved being single.  Now that I'm married, I love being married.

Answer 12

I agree that marriage is not for everyone. But Like anything people complain one way or another.

The Grass is ALWAYS Greener!!!

Answer 13

Marriage is not for everyone. But there are a lot of very happy married couples in this world. I do think that there are a lot of people that are in lust when they get married and not in love. There is a huge difference.

Answer 14

I agree completely. I didn't meet Mr. Right until I was 42 years old.

(I'm 45 now). I heard that line of c**p too many times when I was

single. I knew they meant well but it annoyed me. I was always

tempted to say something like "Yeah, it's so great spending weekends

and holidays alone. But the really great part is having no one to talk

to at the end of my work day. I wouldn't trade it for anything". I truly

hope you meet your special someone soon. Being single is hard-

Keep your chin up and your heart open.

Answer 15

i can answer this one for you.not everyone marriage is great.and for those of us  who live with some one who don't make us happy we fill that way..but you seen to live with some one who does make you happy so .ignore the rest of us who live in misery