Why do newly wedded couples smash cake in each other's face at the reception?

Question

What is the history of this custom? What does it symbolize?

And...

Doesn't anyone find it disrespectful when the 'winner' holds their hands up in victory and emits a weasely sneer?

Answer 1

Its a sign of sense of humor.Come on people,how lame are you all!No sense of humor,what a boring marriage you'll will have.

Answer 2

I don't think its an atrocious thing, but I certainly wouldn't do it.

You pay for the dress, and for your hair to be done, and your make up to be done, and then rub sugar into it? No thanks. :]

Haha yeah, I wouldn't do that, but, hey, each to their own.  

Answer 3

I don't think you should shove the whole cake in someones face, but you know a cute little thing like putting a little frosting on the other persons nose or something is cute....

I guess it is a point of preference.  I would NOT want to ruin the wedding dress though~

Answer 4

My fiance was warned and in response said that he would never do that to me.... I think it's terrible!!!!  

Answer 5

It's petty and dumb. I didn't do it.

Answer 6

"Smashing cake" is not a tradition - people started doing it for laughs, but it really isn't funny. I have seen more brides start to cry because their husbands smashed cake in their faces and ruined their dress, hair, or makeup that they spent so much time on, and more grooms get seriously pissed off because their wives smashed cake in their faces and looked like shrews. Seriously, it's tacky and disrespectful. I knew - KNEW - I would never marry my ex-boyfriend when he said he loved to see couples smash cake in each other's faces.

But feeding each other cake is related to the promises you make at your wedding - you're going to share everything now. What's mine is yours. We're going to take care of and provide for each other. So violently smashing cake in somebody's face really doesn't do much to reflect those promises.

I was at a wedding this past weekend where the couple very gently fed each other a small piece of cake. It was tasteful, respectful, and lovely to watch.

Answer 7

I never thought of it that way as a 'competition' I always thought of it as just something fun/silly thing to do. It's a celebration have some fun with it! I'm not going to be all dainty and ladylike with my guy if i ever get married cause that's not who I am. (I'll totally make him think it's just going to be a simple little thing too that makes it twice as fun) And I'd never expect him to be all dainty with me cause that's not the kind of guy I want. How good can a relationship be with out some good ole fashioned food fight fun?

Answer 8

I didn't know the history behind it.

However, I wasn't sure I wanted to do it but tried to keep an open mind to what my fiance wanted.  When I asked him, he said he didn't think it was a good idea. YAY HUBBY!!!  So, we just fed each other and it was sweet.

We have a sense of humor but felt that wasn't the time or place to be inappropriate.  Our wedding was about our relationship and how special it is.  We tried to make it very sentimental and respectful.

Answer 9

I can't imagine ever smashing a cake in my husband's face.

And if he smashed one in mine, he shouldn't hold his breath for honeymoon s*x.

Answer 10

My husband and I didn't do this. I find it disgusting. Why would you want to start your union off "competing" against each other?

When we were discussing getting married, I brought it up and told him I wouldn't want to marry someone who would even think about doing that. He agrees.

I did find this about history:

This actual history of the wedding cake was originally a cake baked with barley or wheat. The cake would be smashed over the bride´s head at the reception, as a symbol of good luck and fertility.

However, in these days, it can be construed as each person trying to gain the upper hand in the marriage. I think it is a total sign of disrespect.

On that same note, let me just finish by ranting about these new cake toppers that are out there - the ones such as the bride dragging the groom by the collar behind her, for example. These toppers are tacky and beyond tasteless. If you are not entering your marriage with someone together out of mutual respect, you do not need to be getting married. You will only soon be finding yourself among the "divorced" statistic.

Answer 11

Weddings are all about tradition, but there are some new traditions that I could do without.  If you watch America's Funniest Home Videos you see what kinds of stupid ideas people have for weddings, things they think will be funny or cute, but they end up just looking dumb.

The idea is that the bride and groom cut the cake together and each give the other a piece, or each takes a bite of the same piece, symbolizing their new life together or whatever.  Sometime in the (recent) past a couple decided to feed each other the cake and people liked that so it became another 'tradition'.  You can see it's only a short step from feeding each other to smashing cake in each other's faces.  Maybe it was funny the first time.  8^<

Answer 12

It is very rude.  If my hubby tried it, he would be chasing for days! We have been married 21 years.   Respecting the person is what it is all about!

Answer 13

WHAT !!!! do you know how much those cakes cost!

Answer 14

Because they're childish and immature.  I think it's horrible, tasteless and tacky.  I mean, I've seen wedding dresses RUINED by couples doing this--all it takes is the right glob of frosting that's been tinted the right color (usually red) to hit that dress, and there's no getting that out.  

Answer 15

The original idea was for the bride and groom to feed each other the first piece of the Wedding Cake, but over the years, this has almost turned into a food fight. I think it probably started with Generation X, because before that we were still feeding each other the cake as it was done traditionally.

Answer 16

That's interesting history...I just thought it started as something playful but then over time it got out of hand as a competition.  Thankfully you don't see this done much anymore...people find it very tacky and gross.