Why do people assume that I someday want kids?

Question

I won't get off on a rant or anything, but I don't want children, wouldn't date/marry someone *with* children and don't plan to have any.

It's just not the lifestyle I want.

I want to have fun, party till I burn out, travel...basically, have a blast in life, because I've only got one to live.

Heck, I couldn't even take care of a plant or goldfish, much less a kid.

And I'm probably so f*cked up that I wouldn't want to bring any offspring into this world.

I'm not one of the 'childfree' people who sit around bashing parents...just, like, I don't want kids. Yet everyone questions my decision and says "Oh, you'll change your mind".

I'm 26, will be 27 this winter, and I think I'm quite old enough to make up my mind about such an event.

But, like, why do all these naysayers abound?

Answer 1

It's because you'll never know what's around the corner. You could meet the person of your dreams tomorrow and everything could change. And I hate the fact that you think just because you have chuildren that life stops being fun and that you could never do the things you want. That is not the case at all. I know people like you who felt the same way and then the woman had an accidental pregnancy - she and her hubby considered all the options but decided in the end to have the baby. They haven't looked back since and are the most devoted parents I've evr known. So never say never!

Answer 2

Do as YOU wish. Does it really matter what others think?

Answer 3

The only people who should have children are those who really want them.

My wife and I decided we didn't want children. My parents were disappointed but they got over it. My wife's parents never commented. Now that we've been happily married for 49 years, we have no regrets about being child-free.

Answer 4

They assume that you're just going through a phase. They think that, hey, you're in your twenties, you're all for partying hard and having fun. They think that you'll eventually settle down after a while which is why they say "You'll change your mind later".

Mississippi150

Answer 5

Hey, not all childfree people sit around bashing parents. The word "childfree" simply refers to anyone who doesn't want kids; and by definition, that would include you.

I am childfree too (though also not of the parent-hating crowd) and people always assume that I want kids or that I'll change my mind.  Why? From my experience, it seems that it's usually for one of two reasons.

1. They are so closed-minded that they can't believe that someone would actually want a different lifestyle than their own.

2. They feel overwhelmed by parenting, and envy the childfree who don't have to clean up Cheerios off the floor or change diapers; and may regret having children or wish they had waited until they were older to have them. However, they will never come out and say so; because then it will sound like they don't love their children. So, instead, they berate people who choose not to have kids.

Answer 6

It's your decision and if you don't want kids that's fine!

your just living your life having as much fun as you can without children which is fine

there are a lot of people that don't want children

Answer 7

Well, that is what most people do so it's often thought that everyone will do it.  My mom actually told me that she doesn't think that I'd like it, too much of a free spirit and too independent.  I think she's right too.