Why do people assume you have to be married??

Question

me and my partner have been together 7 years this xmas, and have a son and a baby on the way with our own mortgage etc, and are very happy, but people always ask, so when you getting married?? we are engaged, but not in any rush to get married! the thing is we are very good with our money, and dont want to get into dept paying for a wedding! i think its pointless missing out on holidays each year etc, just to pay for one day of a wedding!! we got engaged as thought it would be nice, but not really bothered about planning a wedding plus out of all my friends who are married their relationships arent that good!! we prob have the best one going! for example my married friends husband has been having several affairs! so is marriage the best thing you can do!! does anybody agree with me?? XX

Answer 1

My wife and I lived together for 6 years before we got married in 2000.  We were in no hurry, and we actually lived together longer than a couple of her siblings were married.  I've always thought of her as my wife, and we have always felt married.  You don't need a ceremony to feel married in your heart.  At the end of the day, it should just be a ceremony to confirm what you already feel.

Answer 2

It's just the traditional norm, but do what is right for you. Don't care what the other people think.  There are advantages and disadvantages to both, so you are the ones that have to figure out what is best for you.  You live your lives and let them live their's.  The first time I got married with a wedding and the second marriage I had was a simple park wedding with a couple of friends and the justice of the peace and I was just as happy and it was a fraction of a full wedding and much more comfortable.  I don't think that people really go to the wedding except for respect for the couple, but it's the partying afterwards that gets them going.   If you do get married, just do the JP thing and have a BYB party afterwards. lol

Answer 3

  In the first place if you're talking about being married so you are one in the eyes of God, you can do that very cheaply by a justice of the peace. It sounds like what you're talking about is a reason to throw a party and you can always find one of those.

Answer 4

people assume that because it's the normal thing that happens. usually when people get engaged they get married shortly after-it's what you expect basically.

but if that plan isn't for you then that fine. if you're both happy the way you are then don't worry about it.  

Answer 5

You are right.Marriage is a out dated concept.If you love someone you don't have to be married to prove it.You can live together just as you are and still be very happy together.Besides all marriage is is a piece of paper these days.

So don't let anyone tell you otherwise as long as this is what the 2 of you want and are happy together that is all that is important.

Answer 6

Well, If I was in your shoes, I think I would want to get married. Getting Married is basically making it official. But like you said your friends marriages are failing, that's probably because they we rent ready. But you and your fiancee has been together long, have kids, your own mortgage, and your very happy!---Why not get married? Yes its a relationship on paper, but it's legal and your in the sytem that he's yours, and your his. I think you are just bragging, lol, im kidding. But yea go for it. And just save up on money, it doesnt have to be a celebrity wedding.