Why do people deny, lie and threaten when they mess up?

Question

What happened to the good old fashioned apology? Do they think you'll respect them less if they admit their mistakes?

Answer 1

With men in particular, I think it has a lot to do with pride. There is a complex link between masculinity and pride.

Hardly anyone, however, is able to immediately concede their own wrongdoing to the other person. It's just human nature to defend yourself when attacked (verbally or physically).

I find it's best not to let it get to you, as when people deny stuff the most passionately, that's actually a sign that they're aware they're at fault.  

Answer 2

Because people never want to be the wrong one and  it is easier to lie, deny, etc, then be sorry and apologize. It also has alot to do with how a person is raised and the morals they are brought up with.  I think that in this day and age, families don't spend enough time together.  It seems the parents need to do everything they can just to make enough money to pay bills that they don't have time to raise their children or to even spend with their children.  The whole way of life now a days is totally different.  And I honestly think our society is going further and further the wrong way.  It is one of the reasons I refuse to have children of my own.  Even if you are one of the few parents who raise your child right, there is so much wrong, violence, and just negative stuff that your child then has to deal with.  And i think alot of people just take the easy way on things, like not apologizing.  

Answer 3

Because it's a dog-eat-dog world and they know that some people will exploit their weaknesses and mistakes. Of course, the word 'mistakes' has a very broad meaning to it. Do you mean 'mistakes' like honest to goodness mistakes, like forgetting you left the iron on and burning a shirt or do you mean 'mistakes' like "Oh, I made a mistake and slept with my friends wife"? Or are you just one of those high-handed perfectionists that sees no difference between the two, and figures all accidental mistakes are an act of wicked malice, the result of fiendish plotting against you? Like when someone tells you, "Oh, c**p, I totally forgot to bring your crock-pot back, I've just had so much on my mind, what with my father dying and all", to which you respond in your head, "Okay! You've won this round, a*****e!". If you're like that, then up yours. I can understand why people get tired of apologizing to you. If you're not like that, then I apologize. I'd rather live with or work with an easy-going type than a perfectionist, and quite frankly I wouldn't give two $hits if he made some kind of formal apology to me or not, just as long as I know he's trying to improve, and he really didn't mean anything by it. Yes, he's more likely to forget social convention and etiquette, like forgetting to say 'thank you', but he's obviously far more humble than the perfectionist. I'd rather have his friendship than some fake-*** apology from a perfectionist that's really all an act, anyway. They're not saying it out of concern for me: they're just saying it to save face for themselves. It's what's in their heart that matters, and not what comes out of their mouth.

Answer 4

My guess is that they don't give a fig what you think - they care about their projected persona. They can lie and make it look like you are the one who is wrong/rude/misinformed to the masses to maintain their reputation if they are manipulative enough so why face the music if they don't have to - you're the one who was wrong.