Why do people say that children need to be exposed to disrespectful behavior (bullying)? Isn't it more?

Question

important to learn to be respectful toward others?

Home school graduates have a record of becoming respectful adults. An attribute not shared by the majority of their public school peers.

Answer 1

Just where did you come up with your statement. I doubt from a valid source and I would reject its supposition.

Answer 2

I know someone who was bullied at school and he has raised his 2 children to be bullies and says (I kid you not) that IT IS BETTER TO BE A BULLY THAN BE BULLIED.   But these 2 children bully  their relatives as well, including older Aunties and not just their classmates.   When I commented on this, he said that he knows they (his kids) will be able to look after themselves when he is not around to do it for them.   What do you say to someone like that?

Answer 3

Alot of people say homeschoolers are isolated. They say it's good for kids to go through bullying and teasing because it helps them build character and learn about the "real world".

Who on earth would truly mean something like that? You WANT your kids to be bullied and teased?

No human on this earth deserves to go through that. I don't care who you are--nobody deserves that.

Homeschoolers are at an advantage--they learn how they should treat people and how to respect others.

If the kids in public school act one way, that doesn't mean all kids should act that way.

If jumping off a bridge built character--would you want your kid to do it?

Answer 4

People say it for basically one of two reasons (or both):

1) Lack of knowledge.

2) Lack of being able think truly logically.

What people are doing when they say that kids need to be exposed to bullying and all that is *rationalizing* reasons to have a child be in public school. Now, while being rational is good, there is only so far that rationalizing can take us--we can rationalize ANYTHING into 'truth'. This is why one of the definitions of rationalize has become "defend, explain, clear away, or make excuses for by reasoning" http://www.wordreference.com/definition/... . Just because it seems logical and sensible doesn't actually mean it actually is. Logic depends on the premise being correct and that correct premise requires a certain amount of knowledge.

If you were to look at it from a psychological perspective, looking at what we know about adults' psyches after having lived and witnessed abuse as children, is that they are LESS likely to be able to maturely handle it as adults than those adults who were never exposed to it as children. It's part of the reason why females, in particular, who have grown up in abusive situations or had an abusive relationship as a teen tend to end up in other abusive relationships and unable to find the strength to leave. There are other examples of adult issues being the result of influences and events in their childhood.

Looking at it all from a sociological perspective, it still doesn't make sense because it means that children will grow up perpetuating the behaviour seen around them (whereas many adults seem to think that witnessing disrespectful behaviour on an on-going basis gives a CHILD the opportunity to overcome that; which is attributing a whole lot to a child since adults would have a hard time with it!). It's why they speak the language they speak, why they dress the way they do, why they engage in a myriad of behaviours that are dictated by the society we live in. Children are wired to do it and to expect them to do otherwise is unfair.

Answer 5

well i was homeschooled from 5th to 8th grade and am now in 9th grade and have already gotten into 12 fights and  suspended because i fight everyone for what i belive in if they say sutin that i dont like i start throwin punches u dont belive me look at my record on Hollywodhills.net and look up 9th graders then look through the alphebetical order and find Michael Moreno (i dont know why my name says mikey m on here how can i change that) and click on it and ull see ive been in 12 fights already.i belive that sometime u need to fight in life but that dosent mean u have to go to school to do it necassarily

Answer 6

Public school is considered the "norm". I am not sure why. Basic blanket brainwashing is all that it really is. I was so shocked at the things children do not really learn now in school because it might offend African_americans, Indians or believers/nonbelievers. KIds should learn history as it happened and not some watered down dilluted version of it.

Some parents think the negative socialism molds our children into respectful, moral and leading young adults. I can not understand how underage teen drinking, teen drug use, teen pregnancies, cliques, gangs, school shootings, boy/girl relationships helps our children become better adults. It does the opposite.

They also negate the fact that just about every college out there will tell you that homeschooled children score higher in every area on their tests than public schooled children and are generally better behaved, on time and more respectful students. Do the research yourself if you do not believe me.

Answer 7

Good question.

Everyday we encounter rude people, on the roads, in the stores, in the work place.  We hear stories of out of control kids, bullies, teen pregnancy, and just a general lack of respect for humanity and the environment.  Where did/do most of these people get socialized?  In public school.  

When I look at our society, I am not seeing much in favor of the argument that kids need to be in public school to be properly socialized.  

My two boys are not secluded from other kids, but they get the majority of their values from me and my husband, rather than from 30 other kids in a stuffy classroom with one adult who does not have the time to give moral instruction.

Answer 8

In my experience observing both public and home schooled children: I would say in general home schoolers are more respectful to adults and children of all ages.  Having a parent active in raising them and teaching them right and wrong makes a world of difference.  I am a mother of four, the first a public schooler, the younger three, home schooled.  I can see the difference in attitudes all around in my children.  Also comparing them and other homeschoolers to neighbor kids, I see a great difference.  To you homeschoolers, keep going, it's worth it!!

Answer 9

Absolutely, and even more important is the fact that it is the parents job, as well as their responsibility to make sure they do not place their children in situations that they may not be able to handle, physically, or emotionally; all in the name of "toughing them up", or "learning to deal with difficult situations" to handle "real life".

Children, and young adults will learn that soon enough, when they are more mature, and also more secure in their abilities to handle difficult (bullies) people.

When young people are treated respectfully by peers, and adults alike, and yes, heaven forbid are shielded from this kind of unacceptable behavior, they are more apt to see the "wrong" of it because they have not been desensitized by being exposed to it daily.

Since most home schooled students are not immune to these influences, they are also not exposed to them often enough for it to become a crisis in their lives.

Home schooled parents therefore can use these as teaching moments to point out that this is unacceptable, and offer pointers in how to deal with such situations.

When a child, or young adult is bullied , or treated disrespectfully by peers, or other adults in the schools there is too much emotion, and drama to teach the child, or young adult effectively since the hurt feelings are clouding everything else.

This can therefore leave life long scares, and negatively influence how this young person deals with others later in life.