Why do people think common courtousy is the same as chilvary ?

Question

Courtesy: as both men and women can be courteous to each other this term is not sexist. For example, in the supermarket it is courteous to hold the door open for the person behind you.....whichever gender that may be.

Chivalry: this term is sexist because a man can only be chivalrous to a woman. The man regards the woman as 'the weaker s*x' and therefore, protects her because of her 'frailty'. For example, a woman waits in the car while the man opens the door for her. How many women do you see doing this for their men?

Why do alot of women deserve common courtesy and chivalry and men just deserve common courtesy ?

Answer 1

when is the last time you even had a date, guy

Answer 2

I feel that way and I feel BOTH are for BOTH men and women.  Chivalry is actually an archaic term that has to do with the days of knights and ladies and is a standard of ethical behavior.

I do not know your purpose in repeating this question over and over, it's redundant.  I see, you created this name tonight and all you have done is ask the question...that means you are trolling.

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This

chiv·al·ry Audio Help /ˈʃɪvəlri/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[shiv-uhl-ree] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation

–noun, plural -ries for 6. 1. the sum of the ideal qualifications of a knight, including courtesy, generosity, valor, and dexterity in arms.

2. the rules and customs of medieval knighthood.

3. the medieval system or institution of knighthood.

4. a group of knights.

5. gallant warriors or gentlemen: fair ladies and noble chivalry.

6. Archaic. a chivalrous act; gallant deed.

[Middle English chivalrie, from Old French chevalerie, from chevalier, knight; see chevalier.]

Word History: The Age of Chivalry was also the age of the horse. Bedecked in elaborate armor and other trappings, horses were certainly well dressed, although they might have wished for lighter loads. That the horse should be featured so prominently during the Age of Chivalry is etymologically appropriate, because chivalry goes back to the Latin word caballus, "horse, especially a riding horse or packhorse." Borrowed from French, as were so many other important words having to do with medieval English culture, the English word chivalry is first recorded in works composed around the beginning of the 14th century and is found in several senses, including "a body of armored mounted warriors serving a lord" and "knighthood as a ceremonially conferred rank in the social system." Our modern sense, "the medieval system of knighthood," could not exist until the passage of several centuries had allowed the perspective for such a conceptualization, with this sense being recorded first in 1765.

Synonym Collection v1.1  

Main Entry:   courtesy

Part of Speech:   adjective

Synonyms:   affable, attentive, chivalric, chivalrous, complimentary, courteous, debonaire, deferential, gratis, hospitable, ingratiating, obeisant, obsequious, parliamentary, servile, suave, urbane

Answer 3

because there are just some things that men should do, that men should ALWAYS do, and that women shouldn't be obliged to. We should always hold the door. Women may, but aren't necessarily required to, it's courteous but not needed (exceptions apply in the case of burdened, handicapped, etc.) Men should always be willing to take the bad seat, to let the lady have her choice of where to sit. We should always offer our coat when it's colder than we anticipated and she's wearing a lovely dress that isn't keeping her quite warm enough.

We should bring flowers for no particular reason. Men should always offer (not insist) to take the heavy load, the difficult to carry object. We should always stand closest to the curb, sit after her, and be willing to deal with the insects and rodents and other things that nobody wants to deal with. It's part and parcel to our masculine nature.

To deny what makes our genders different emotionally, sociologically and tempermentally is just as destructive as forcing archaic gender roles. We must recognize the differences and celebrate them for the best they can be, while working to shed the worst aspects of them.

And so yes, only a man can be chivalrous. Only men SHOULD be chivalrous. It has been with us for a long time and it is and can be a very good thing, affirming to the best in the masculine psyche and beneficial to all.

Answer 4

And this says what about women who 'expect' something of Chivalry from me / men?

I do not regard woman or women as 'the weaker s*x' ~ in general terms.  But that would not stop me from being either courteous or chivalrous to a woman or to a man in the circumstances where the context suited or merited that behaviour.

I understand your point and to a degree agree. However, it is a broad brush you are using to slap over us all.

Sash.

Answer 5

If they say chivalry is just common courtesy they think we'll be confused and not notice the hypocrisy when they claim they only want equality.

Answer 6

I don't like chivalry. I think it's a double standard. I think we are equal, so why not treat everyone equal. Common courtesy is fine, but when you are going out of your way, to do stupid things like push in a chair, open a car door, and stuff like that just because it's a girl and not a guy, that bothers me.

Answer 7

You see, what people fail to realize is women being protected by men isn't social engineering, its genetic engineering. Men have protected women and treated them like goddesses in most society because they make life and ARE physically weaker.  

Answer 8

Is this what feminism is now? Fighting wars against men who show respect to women.

Answer 9

I agree. Common courtesy is all we need.

EDIT-Originata--What "wars?" No one is "fighting men," the point is that respect can be shown through simple common courtesy. Why does there need to an entirely SEPARATE set of rules for how to show respect to women and how to show respect to men? And IS it really respect, then, or something else, entirely?

Oh, and the asker is a guy, BTW.

Answer 10

Most people consider a man holding a door open for a woman to be chivalrous because so few women would even bother to think of holding a door open for a man.

Yes, it SHOULD be an act of courtesy, but until women step up and act in a courteous manner, I think it falls in the realm of chivalry.

Answer 11

Chivalry is just an old-fashioned ideal. I don't think that the men of today who are considered "chivalrous" believe that women are the "weaker s*x" and blah blah blah. I think that they consider it a form of common courtesy. I don't think it's sexist, it's kind of nice actually.

My husband is a very polite man. I suppose he could also be considered "chivalrous". He opens my car door for me, etc. He doesn't do it because he thinks I'm weaker, he does it because he feels that it is a form of caring for me and treating me well. He is also polite towards other men (although not to the extent that he is to me) by opening doors for them and such.

Anyway, the point is, chilvary is not always such a bad thing and shouldn't be looked at as an insult.

Answer 12

Simply because the man is in love with the woman and his actions to obtain the same feelings from her , that is, to get her to fall in love with him. are actions of Chivalry.Just for the girl he wants , not everybody

make sense? holding a door for some one is just common courtesy, one does not do it for any feelings in return.

you ask,"Why do a lot of women deserve common courtesy and chivalry and men just deserve common courtesy ?" Generations ago, the male chased the female, a girl never called a boy on the phone, the boy always did the calling to the girl. like wise when going on a date to a dance, the prom, a movie , etc. and the boy always spent his money, never the girls. boys that were really in love with a certain girl would give her his class ring , if she accepted it, they were referred to as "going steady" if for some reason the girl fell out of love with the boy, she returned the ring and the relationship was over. as generations pass relationships  are changing, women want equal rights and to be treated the same as men. So girls, pull out your wallets and spend some of your money on him instead of yourselves. you'll find that  having a boy being chivalrous over you was a bit more satisfying than having to coax him into it. And in the long run, cloaks the answer to , "does he really love me or is it just for s*x"

Answer 13

I don't know. Maybe you and your feminist pals can write a petition to the publishers of dictionaries to get rid of the chivalry. Maybe if you write to the PC brigade, they will ban the word.  

Answer 14

I have always believed a man opened the car door out of respect and honor, and or is according to his own beliefs and customs.  Trust me were I frail I would not be in that car; yes I know what you mean.  The term is only sexist to those who view it as such.