Why do people think they have the right to criticize teen parents?

Question

Why do they think its ok to talk down to a teen mom because shes asking questions on here?

Shes automatically a W**** because she had a baby. Just because she has a baby does not mean she has slept with tons of guys, is a bad mother or person. I just means she got her miracle from god a little earlier than most. Over half of high school and middle school kids are having s*x but yet only the ones who got pregnant are the bad ones.

And another thing teen moms are not the only ones on food stamps or wic or welfare there are people who weren't teen parents but still have those things. The government created those things for a reason to help people in need. and not all teens moms even use those resources.

Answer 1

i only think its ok when the stupid teen moms come on here and ask things like "OMG! im 13 and pregnant what should i do?" or the teen dads come on and say "Oh no, i got my 14 year old gf pregnant, how do i tell my parents?..." thats the stupid stuff that gets on my nerves, and makes me ashamed to even BE a teenager.

i dont judge harshly or anything, but when a stupid teen parent comes on here and ask questions like we care that they got pregnant and stuff, it gets on my nerves. i dont mind helping, but when ur like 13 yrs old and u come on here asking 4 help cause u got pregnant, im like its not my problem u were obviously too irresponsible, so why do i care?

like i said, i dont judge harshly, but when a dumb 13 or 14 yr old comes on here asking for help because they had s*x w/ there 16 yr old bf's and they're pregnant, i'm going to tell them how it is, and tell them my opinion. i dont think every teen mom is a w****, but its the annoying irresponsibility that gets on my nerves!

( ~ 8*

Answer 2

AMEN!

And people wonder why the abortion rate is so high.  Could it have anything to do with the ridiculous stigma that we put on pregnant teens?  We all know that teens are having s*x, but when one of them accidentally gets pregnant- often by a steady boyfriend- we offer insults instead of support.  Of course teen pregnancy is far from ideal, and I definitely don't encourage teens to TRY to conceive, but can we at least be nice to people?

If you want to get involved helping young moms in your area, I highly recommend paying a visit to your local pregnancy center.  They're always looking for volunteers!

<3 Kelsey

Answer 3

Good for you.  Don't listen to the haters.  People have to talk down on anything and everything.  Most people that talk down so much are just insecure with themselves.  I have seen many young moms do everything right and some old moms that do everything wrong.  Yes teens shouldn't be having s*x, but if they did and made a child and are doing right for that child then thats hat matters.  Age is nothing but a number and haters go in one ear and out the other.

Answer 4

Because, statistically, 60% of teenage mothers go on welfare, and that's our tax dollars.

Not to mention the children are supposed to be our future, but because of having children as children only 2% of them finish college, and only 15% of children of teenage parents finish college.

Surprisingly, an adult mught know more than a child. I know, it's shoking.

Answer 5

congrats these old ladies r just mad cuz they cant have kids anymore b.c most of these old moms look like they r the grandparents lol  

Answer 6

I really like this question. I totally agree with everything you are saying here. I guess people like to criticize because they believe that young people are not capable of caring for children. However, there are plenty of adults out there that aren't capable of taking care of children either. It has nothing to do with age when it comes to readiness of caring for a child. Yes, there may be more of a struggle with young parents due to lack of education and knowledge, but it doesn't mean they won't be successful. Many teen moms now are able to get an education, opposed to years ago when there were no programs or funding for child care.( Which I must add, these programs are available to EVERYONE, not just teens.)

  And it is true, not all teen moms are on welfare or other resources provided by the government. And you are correct when you say that it is not only teen parents using those resources.

  It is a shame that people don't look at the BIG picture.

Answer 7

"got her miracle from god "

actually, hon, God would consider that a sin. (unless you're married).

Answer 8

Because people have the absolute right to criticize anything or anyone they choose, whether you like it or not.

And I can't help but notice that you are presently exercising that same right to criticize and judge other people based on their opinions/actions.

Answer 9

First of all, people do criticize high school and middle school kids who have s*x. Second of all, having a kid before you're married is naturally frowned upon in society because you haven't completed your education. You don't have an actual career and such you'll need to support a family. And clothes aren't the only things a kid will need. Only for that age, yes. It will just get harder and harder. Plus, if you do pursue college studying will be next to impossible what with a child around. Not to mention arranging your college schedule around an infant? Good luck with that. The reason why people think they have the right to criticize teen moms is because what they did is not only impractical, but it's completely irresponsible as well. You have plenty of time to have children later in your life. Stop being so overly defensive. People have their opinions and have a right to their opinions. That, itself, answers your question.

Answer 10

Good for you! I'm happy things are working out well for you! Good luck in the future!

I'm also 17 (almost 18) and my little guy just turned 8 months. Me and my boyfriend are still together and we love him very much! We do still live at home because our parents asked us to stay home until we finished school. However, if we were to move out, we could afford it. We are moving out when I graduate in January (yay!). I'm planning on staying home for a year and then attending university or college..depending on what career I choose.

Like you, we always have the things we need. We're not on any kind of social assistance. His baby milk, baby food, diapers, and wipes are constantly stocked which is how I like to keep it, just in case theres a rainy day or something. He has a closet full of clothing and lots of toys.

Me and my boyfriend get comments too about being great parents. Even from people we don't know that see us out and about. We both have reliable cars which makes getting to the store and doctor easier!

People are just narrow-minded and stereotypical. They would be the first ones to say anything if we ran out and had abortions or gave our baby up for adoption so there's no winning situation for us. They don't realize we can actually make something of ourselves. I even read a post on facebook that said all teen moms (not fathers) should be shot and our babies aren't important. It takes two to tango baby.

Like you said, there are many bad adult parents. How many of them are divorced, on welfare (not saying divorced or people on welfare are bad but if we aren't with the father or are on assistance, we're bad), are drug and alcohol addicted, prostitutes, can't support their child, and neglect, abuse, molest, and murder their own kids. Quite a few of them!

For anyone who would like to comment on my post, please email me instead of posting it on here where i'll never see it again. I'd love to hear from you!

Keep your heads up young parents! Let them talk. We're already the bigger and better person for not listening to them.

Edit: I got pregnant on birth control so it wasn't planned.

I ALSO BELIEVE BABIES ARE A MIRACLE FROM GOD. FOR THOSE WHO SAID IT'S A SIN TO HAVE A BABY OUT OF WEDLOCK..IT'S ALSO A SIN TO MURDER ONE TOO ISN'T IT?

Answer 11

I don't slander teen moms but I know alot of people do they are just judgemental.

There is a road for all of us to take we have to make the best of it!

Prevention starts at home. I mean the teens mom you have to prepare him or her for the real world and what might happen. Things can still happen but if it would be talked about more maybe it can be prevented.

I too had my son young and did the same thing you did. Took a stand. Keep doing what you are doing. Even though you have had a child young it doesnt mean its the end of the world. B

My only advice as a mother at 26 now is to be prepared. I mean don't just focus on your child. Make you and his daddy something. Schooling  leading to a good amount of resources as they grow.

At 11 those jordans my son wants along with all his special gels and hair styling products and clothes are VERY expensive. Have the means to pay for him.

Good luck keep with up the good job mommy

Answer 12

Whether the pregnancy is intentional or a mistake, people should not judge any teen mother so harshly.  

People feel that it is wrong for someone so young to be engaged is such sexual activity simply because it's a careless act. There are too many teen pregnancies in this world, and these teens are not ready for such a responsibility.  

Many people frown upon teen mothers, not because they aren't good mothers, but because they could have gone further in life without the setback of working around a child.  It's a consequence that has become such a statistic, that people can't help but want to see young people learn not to follow the same path.

So, when they see an un-wedd teen mother, they just wonder why.  Why didn't they think about the consequences to their actions when it happens so often?  People wonder why the same thing keeps happening, and why these teens can't learn from it without experiencing it.

Still, no one has the right to place harsh judgement on these teens.  Everyone is entitled to make mistakes.  We all do.  No one is exempt from making the same mistakes as those before them.  History will always find a way to repeat itself as long as the mentality of people remains the same.

Answer 13

R U SERIOUS?!!!!

IM A CHRISTIAN AND I KNOW ITS NOT RIGHT FOR TEENS TO HAVE A CHILD!

MIRACLE FROM GOD?! GOD WANTS PEOPLE TO HAVE CHILDREN IN WEDLOCK! HE ALSO DOESNT WANT TEENS HAVING BABIES.

STOP ACTING LIKE ITS OK FOR TEENS TO HAVE A BABY!!

those girls make stupid choices to sleep with others. and then they have to suffer the consquences.

the bottomline is that being a teen is a time to have fun and still be young. if you have a child your life isnt about you anymore.

you have to admit that teens should wait.

Answer 14

I agree. I'm a teen mom ( almost), and the only place people tell me c rap is on here !

I gave into s*x ONE time, and used protection...but my little blessing is on her her way ! no more s*x for me. But I'm taking care of my responsibility.

Answer 15

I agree with you.

Honestly, I admire anyone who has an unwanted pregnancy but decides to go through the pregnancy and then either puts the baby up for adoption or keeps it. Just because you ****** up doesn't mean the baby deserves to suffer by dying.

I think the only "bad" parents are parents who cant afford to cloth their children or feed them dirt.

People are consider teen parents "bad parents" are just stereotyping. ANYONE can be a good parent, and ANYONE can suck as a parent. It's different for everyone, the age of the parents truly doesn't matter.

Answer 16

o my gosh, that touched me:) i am to a teen mother. and 15 years old, and about to have a baby in November:) and i am happy for the blessing of having a baby:)  i know i have to grow up really fast. but my parents are trying to make it ware i don't have to like they r trying to take all the responsibility of the baby.  and yeah i am really sick of people calling me a w***e for being pregnant well for all though's people, i am not a w***e! because i know who the daddy is! and i don't sleep around! and the daddy is still here for me! he didn't ditch me like most guys would! he is still hear for me:) anyways how did you get through it? sorry i need advice to get threw this? like what did you do to start off?

Answer 17

they do, unless you live in china, ever heard of free speech?

Answer 18

(a) how would a stranger on y!a even know they're speaking to a teen mom unless someone volunteers the information?

(b) half the questions asked by teen moms are incredibly provocative.  they express the height of immaturity, ignorance, and bad parenting.  sure, they're asking for answers from people, but one still fears what environment the child is currently in

(c) teen parenthood will never be a good thing.  the vast majority of the time it's underpaid, underworked, unmarried, immature people who get themselves in this situation.

(d) sure, not all teen mothers are on wic.  a LOT of them are being supported by their parents.  very few of them are supporting themselves, they can't.  very seldom are you talking about someone with a high school education (at least), or even a job.

(e) people think they have the right to criticize everyone.

Answer 19

I also hate it when people call teen moms horrible names. Just because they got pregnant doesn't mean anything. Its not like they sleep with a hundred guys. I totally agree with you.

Answer 20

i completely agree with you!

like i cant even start to say how much it pisses me off when people call teen moms s***s and say they cant take care of there baby and stuff like that. it just makes me so mad!

my best friends mom had her when she was 17 and shes an amazing mom! infact there extremely well off.

where as my mom, who had me when she was 30 something is an awful, abusive person.

im gonna stop now before i get into a huge rant.

i know its a little late haha but congrats on your son (:  

Answer 21

Honestly, it's just a stereotype that people have for teen moms. And why do people have that stereotype? Because it really shouldn't be that hard to use protection. Unless you are trying to get pregnant at a young age, then use some freaking protection. I don't know why you'd want to have a baby at such a young age, just so you can make it harder on yourself. Teen mothers are often portrayed as being careless, and welfare families, because they USUALLY don't have the money to support another human being, and they USUALLY were careless, because they could have been more careful.

You're a teen mother, so I'd like to ask you, did you use protection when you slept with your boyfriend?

Answer 22

honestly i'm not judgemental to the girls who it happened to on accident like from rape or if the condom broke or if their birth control failed.

but if your intentionally having unprotected s*x and then wondering how you get pregnant thats when i'm judgemental. and if your a teen girl who thinks you can take care of a child when your like 15 and you think you know everything about a child. thats when i am

but in your case honestly i'm happy for you. i'm glad you have your life together=] and i wish you the best of luck in life. and i just want you to know that life maybe a little bit harder since you have a child. but your strong and you can make it through=]

Answer 23

Why is this so important to you? Bad moms come in all ages. BUT teens do not need to be having s*x much less having children. Children cannot raise children. So you and your boyfriend are still together? So what? And if you need people to tell you that you're a good mom then you must have doubts about yourself. If you were not breastfeeding you would have WIC I'm sure. But the fact remains that teenagers are not mentally or emotionally equipped to successfully raise children. Are you saying you never get help from your parents? BULLSH*T! No teen can be a great mother all on their own.

Answer 24

Because they are small minded.

And to the person who said babies should only become in wedlock, as that's what god wanted, can i just say when the human race started there was no such thing as marriage, and people had babies at a younger age than say 16. I'm sure Adam and Eve weren't married!! Lol!!

And good on you =D keep it up!! Prove them t**ts wrong!!

Answer 25

You need to put a filter on what you take in from strangers.  You are young, and you can benefit from getting advice on here.  But you can't put your self esteem on the table every time you ask question, it isn't for discussion.  We all know things happen.  You're main objective is to take care of that baby.  Just brush off the haters and don't worry about it and work on being a good momma.

Answer 26

i can tell by your question your still a bit immature!  just bcuz you've got diapers and you and your boyfriend are still together playing house, doesn't mean it's going to last.  teen moms that i know live in a fantasy world and think babies stay babies, but they don't.  babies grow up, get more expensive, and who's left paying?  parents, grandparents, and taxpayers.

you say you're a good mom, fine.  but understand this:  it'll only get more challenging from here on out and people are entitled to their opinions on this subject, bcuz it effects everyone!