Why do so many people think that home schooled children have social problems?

Question

I have been homeschooled my whole life and I socialize a lot better than a lot of schooled children.

Answer 1

ROFLOL  Cristal thinks our kids never leave our HOSES.    *grin*   It's nice to get a chuckle out of these questions now and then.

My guess is that all these people have met many homeschooling and they have no clue because the kids aren't 'weird' and they don't know they are home schooled.

However, they meet kids who are not "normal" and find out they are home schooled and they immediately colour everyone with the same brush.    I've met some pretty odd public school kids in my time but I don't judge them all the same way like these guys do.

Frankly, I just try to ignore it.

Answer 2

Why do people never question the social problems of public schooled children? There is vast evidence that it exists.

I think it's ignorance to not realize that a school is not the only or the best setting for social situations.

Most people also don't realize the variety and amount of homeschool associations (And I'm not talking about 4-H) that are in existence. Or that many community's extra-curricular activities like sports and theatre are available to homeschooled children as well.

I realize that there are those homeschooled families whose choice was based on (way-too) strict religion that turn out odd kids, but that is not the majority.

And what about the odd kids that public schools turn out?

Answer 3

this kid left my school cause he did

so some do not all but some

Answer 4

These people are uninformed.   Give them time, civilization will get to their part of the world soon and they will realize that people do not have to be in a classroom to have friends.

I've often wondered why these same people who insist that homeschooled children  could not possibly have a social life are the same people who are opposed to organized religion.   They feel they can worship God in their homes as well as they can in a church.    Wonder why they don't apply that to learning and having a social life outside of 'organized' education???  Weird, huh?

Answer 5

Maybe due to the image they have of lonely children never leaving their house only with books under their noses.LOL

I too have been home-schooled most of my life and have no problems mingling, the only big difference I do find is that I'm a lot more independent and have an easier time making decisions than most public school kids.

Answer 6

Cuz they don't get the everyday contact with other kids and other people that normal school kids do. I mean that's not entirely true, but being in a school environment gives the kid opportunities to be in a lot of different kind of social situations that he/she may be or may not be comfortable with. And from these experiences they can learn how to deal with them.

Answer 7

Because they are to stupid to get there kids into programs....I think we have more of an advanage because we are smarter than public schoolers....

Answer 8

A variety of reasons:

1) Because they assume or falsely rationalize things rather than base their opinion on actual knowledge or broad thinking.

2) They have "perserverative thinking" or "conceptual rigidity"--this essentially means that regardless of any information to the contrary, they are simply unable to learn past their preconceived notion.

3) They've met weird homeschoolers and have assumed they are all like that.

4) They have no clue how many normal kids they've met who have been homeschooled--it's not like they walk around with it tatooed on their heads.

5) They are simply unable to think outside the box and understand how somebody could develop well socially without going to school--because that's how they grew up and their parents grew up...

Answer 9

ignorance

my kids are home schooled and they have great social skills

people think that home schooled kids don't get to interact with other kids and that may be true in some cases but here;s a good point to take...when in your life will your be in a room with30 of your peers?-the classroom is an unnatural place to socialize

Answer 10

Several years ago, it was illegal to homeschool in several states, and difficult in many others.  Homeschoolers often kept to themselves, out of necessity, and there were kids that grew up to be socially deficient.  Not all, of course, but there were enough.

However, times have changed; apparently, stereotypes haven't.  A lot of people don't realize that homeschooling doesn't necessarily mean "schooling at home" - it means having the whole world available as your school.  Peoples' perceptions are difficult to get past, unless they choose to see past them.  Unfortunately, there are a lot of people today who don't see a point in doing so.

Answer 11

because those people are completely ignorant and believe everything they are told!

Answer 12

I believe that it all depends on who is teaching you!  For instance my husband and his younger brother were homeschooled.  My husband was homeschool his highschool years.  His brother since 4th grade.  My husband is a Chief in the Navy, and his brother is an Aerospace engineer at Boeing.  Now his older two siblings are in great careers as well and they attended school K-12, and they both have great careers.  His older brother is a graphics designer, and his older sister works for a software company and among her duties include web design and web consulting.  So I believe it's the parents and the expectations they set for their children, and not if they go to school or not!  

Some students need the structure of the classroom while other's thrive learning on their own.  You can provide those needs for your children even as a homeschooling parent!  I am a teacher, and with the condition of the local school where I live I'd feel better if I taught my daughter at home.  I've even talked to a couple of friends who have said the same thing, and we even discussed team teaching so that the children would get the best possible person to teach them the subject!

You are affected by the effect of the people around you!  I went to school K-12 and my husband is very social, but he is naturally an introvert.  That is who he is.  He is VERY Smart, but I believe he would still be the same person even with going to highschool.  

Now we have family on both sides that the children are the faces in the skirts kind of kids, and it really breaks my heart.  It is because of the way the parents act, and treat the children that this affect takes presadent.  I do have friends and family that homeschool and you put their children in a group and you wouldn't know the difference!

Answer 13

Because I've met them

Answer 14

because they don't socialize

Answer 15

Empirical evidence.

Of course, it all depends upon the situation--if a child is homeschooled by parents who actually know what they're doing (in contrast to parents who are simply antisocial or religious freaks), it's possible the child could be normally socialized.

You must be one of the lucky ones.

Answer 16

because mostly they dont come out of their hoses and they dont really intererat

Answer 17

Ignorance on their parts.  What exactly does it mean to "socialize" anyway?  My children are able to get along with other children as well as talk to adults.  They know right from wrong.  They play well with each other at home and with other children when we are out.  So what's so bad about the fact that I homeschool them?  Is it because they don't act like the children in public school?  There are SOME children in public schools who are out of control.  There are SOME homeschooled children who are shy and isolated.  That doesn't mean we should stereotype either group.

Answer 18

I wonder about this too.  It is the question most asked of me (after what about time for yourself), you really would think we lock our children away from the world.  I am not protecting them from society, I am protecting them from School, disinterested teachers, bullying, curiculum and test based learning that is not particularly useful to real life. I think the socialisation myth is great propoganda by school people and I shake my head and remember to be thankful that we have recognised it for what it is.

Answer 19

My experience has been that they do, but I'm not at all doubting that there are socially adept homeschooled kids out there. I go to a big high school (3200) and the home schooled kids I know of do tend to be a lot more shy and have less of a network. That might be due to missing middle school, though. A lot of the groups were made in middle school. I just generally found that homeschooled kids didn't have as many friends, and I always assumed it was because they weren't socialized when they were little.

Answer 20

People think that home schooled children are non-social because they don't go to a public and/or private school.  That cause people to think that the reason they don't go to those types of schools is because they don't socialize well.

Answer 21

I homeschooled my six in Texas & then overseas in Saudia Arabia I homeschooled five. They came back to the U.S.A. & were tested. Their tests were very high (over 92). They did attend high school in Indiana & they received full ride scholarships to any university in Indiana. One is studying law, one forensic science & 2 attend the University of Indiana Dental School. They are extremely social. It all depends on who is doing the homeschooling.

Answer 22

because they are weird

Answer 23

I know I get that a lot and I am very social. Because people dont know  or understand it and are scared of new things, and think oh your home schooled you must stay in side your house and be antisocial. I find this funny, because how wrong they are. my brother goes to public school and its very antisocial. so there is an example public school doesn't not make you social, being social depends on a person not a school.

Answer 24

i don't know why i guess because they don't know a lot about it . like if someone from china came to America I would prob assume things about them too  because I don't know that much about day to day Chinese life. but i know what you mean i was at limited too when i was 10 and the cheek out lady was like what school do you go to  and i said I'm home schooled then she looked at me like i came from a different planet and said 'do you have any friends?' i hate that :P

Answer 25

These kids are isolated from the real world. They might socialize great with their relatives, but they cannot socialize with the general public. Usually they are being homeschooled because their parents think something will happen to them at the Public Schools.

I lived next to a family of 5 homeschooled kids. I felt sorry for them. Was your mother qualified to teach you? What is her educational background.

Answer 26

You're an exception.  Many Home-Schooled children are sheltered from social situations that are occurring in everyday life.  Home-Schooling is a way that many parents think they can protect there children from the outside world.  If you're not being exposed to society you can't deal with situations brought before you.   I don't have a problem with home-schooled children.  I know several that are being home-schooled and hate it.  They would prefer being around other children and not around there siblings and parent all the time.

Answer 27

That may be true, but are you socializing with many kinds of children from many socio-economic groups?  Most home-schooled children social with children who live similarly.  And, volunteering for the underprivileged does not count.  That is not developing a friendship and actually relating to the people as equals.

Answer 28

Well some of these people are just downright outlandish! Let me use this as an example: I have no misconceptions of public schoolers, and I do not judge them until I get to know them, yet these people are right off the bat saying that they "never get out" , "don't socialize well", etc. Well I am a homeschooler, and I enjoy a very social life, thank you. I love meeting people, and can carry on a conversation with almost anybody. I have no prejudices against public schoolers, and neither should public schoolers have a prejudice against homeschoolers, until that person talks to the person as an individual (not as a stereotype.) So, those who think homeschoolers are homebodies? You are the people who should get out more.... because you have obviously not yet met a good paradigm of a homeschooler. *Steam blows off head.* *Lol*

-Ali (homeschooled, 9th grade)

Answer 29

I'm with Mike...  Because I've met them!!!  Unless we've met the same ones, the social problem is bigger than what you home schoolers think...

Answer 30

Because public school teaches you how to deal with people.

Oh wait. *I* went to public school and I was a painfully shy loner for *years*.

I was a Political Science major in college, and one of the common things you see in political arguments is people compare the best case scenario of the policy they like vs. the worst case scenario of the policy they oppose. It's particularly common whenever you suggest that the government doesn't need to do something because individuals can do it on their own (like, oh, say, homeschooling?). People opposed to alternatives in education work under the assumption that the current system is just fine, so anything new must be perfect before being considered for replacement.