Why do some adults immediately think all teenagers are "up to no good"?

Question

I am 14 and I have made mistakes in my life I can admit to but I have changed a lot over the past year. I have a boyfriend and my dad immediately thinks that means I'm going to have s*x and stuff, my dad often calls me a tart and it does hurt my feelings obviously. I just want to know why some adults are like that? so answer please thanks :]

Answer 1

They've been there before and know what can go through a teenager's head.

Not all teenagers, but a lot of teenagers are up to no good. I agree with you, I don't like being judged just because of my age. Talk to your Dad, maybe he doesn't realise that it upsets you so much.

Answer 2

i know how it feels, my best friend called me a s**t because i snogged someone? ;/ i mean, how pathetic, & my dad moans saying ''i told you not to get involved!'' when i tell him i've broke up with my ex. thats why i just never tell him anymore. my mum is dead so its more harder then it already is.  

Answer 3

*sigh* parents!! i get on really really well with my dad now, but i never used to.

i'm 23 now but when i was 13 my dad saw me holding a boys hand (and that is ALL i did by the way! and all i had ever done) and he called me a s - l - u - t   !!!!!!!

i reminded him of it the other day and he cant remember it and denies it!!!!

he also wont admit to being over protective...its as much their fault as the teenagers half the time.thinking about it - they are normally going through a mid life crisis kind of age when their kids are teenagers lol

its a bad clash......its even worse if you are their first child, as i am.

the test child!

Answer 4

they don't think that's ALL kids get up to - but they don't care about the other stuff.  They don't care and aren't there to ruin your fun, they just care to stop you doing drugs, having s*x or breaking the law.

Answer 5

sounds to me like you have done something in the past that lost his trust. i have always told my daughter that it takes years to build trust and only seconds to tear it down. tell him that him calling you a tart hurts your feelings and ask him not to do it again.

Answer 6

well i'm a parent of a pre-teen who acts liike she's 17, in the aspect of disrespecting me, but i haven't had to deal w/ the bf stuff yet, so i dont know what a "tart" is, but if you honestly aren't sexually active, maybe you could explain to him that just because some teens are sexually active doesn't mean that all teens are, tell him that by him calling you a " "tart" is very childish for name calling, & that it's very disrespectful, & that if he wants you to have an honest,& open relationship with him, he's got to trust you, but that too does mean if he asks you personal questions you should answer him truthfully w/out asking him why he asks.as a parent i am more likely to trust my child if she lets me in her life, as in tells me how things in her personal life are going ya know like w/ friends, etc. if she's having any sad,mad, or happy feelings, & why she has those feelings.sometimes in order to be the best parent we can be we need to know what's going on in your lives.

Answer 7

Remembering my own youth and that of my daughters and now watching my grandchildren grow up I'd say is because they probably are up to just that. It's probably something that every concerned parent goes through.

Answer 8

uhm. b/c they've been there before! lol.

also.. if you've given him a reason not to trust you alone with a guy, then he has good reason not too.. you're just going to have to regain his trust back  

Answer 9

Because they have it shoved in their faces every day by the media.

Answer 10

Most parents are usually just trying to be cautious. You are their baby still in their eyes and always will be. (I know my parents definitely still think this way of me.) They care and most likely are just trying to protect you. A lot of parents know more than we would usually think. As you get older, your dad should learn to understand that you are growing up and becoming more mature. Try talking with your dad, like actually having a sit-down conversation with him. It might be awkward at first, but the both of you will feel better after you get to understand where each other is coming from.

Answer 11

A "tart"?

Because teens are secretative.  Because your dad knows what he was like (and maybe still is) at 14.  He knows that your boyfriend MAY convince you to do something you thought you never would because maybe your dad did the same to a girl back then.  Because maybe he knows what your mom did at 14.  Because 14 is the age of sexual curiousity.  Because parents are just going to think that way no matter what you tell them.

Answer 12

Children have to earn the trust of their parents and if a child  does something to break that trust it makes it harder for the parent to believe them in the future. Sure all people make mistakes and do things they probably should not have but breaking trust is something much different. Lying is the biggest breaker of trust. You can do something you were not supposed to do BUT if you lie about it and deny you did it your parents will have a very hard time believing you even when you are telling the truth.

Tell the truth........ALL the time!

Answer 13

i think the reason why they think that is cause of what's currently going on...with things like knife crime and 14 year olds becoming pregnant they see those few cases and think every teen will either be pregnant or carrying a knife round with them...but i know that they were like that in some way...when my dad was young he used to pick fights and pick up dead birds and stuff (he was a skinhead apparently) your dad probably hasnt told u the bad stuff he's done