Why do some men pull away when things get too emotional?

Question

I have a male friend who is really close to me. Our relationship is one that cannot be described in words. Any who a few days ago he admitted to having feelings for me and finally told me he loved me.

This took place on Aug. 7. Now I have not heard from him since. I have noticed this pattern in him. He will be really sentimental and close to me and when he finally allows himself to be vulnerable he will dissappear for a wk. or so. What's the deal? He's hot and cold. I have noticed this pattern for a LONG time.

It makes me not want to open up emotionally anymore because he runs off, lol.

(i'd like to mention that we are NOT having s*x)

Answer 1

Iv been a lonely person for years and I was the lonely guy

but your the girl  you don't desert this Its not fair you deserve better

I wish I could tell you to stay with him but people need love so do you

look your young  find some one else this guy sounds like he has mental problems

a normal man would never vanish just like that and this guy dose

you mentioned that you never had s*x with him good don't

because if he ever got you pregnant he will truly disappear

and then you will be left alone with a baby and then no man will want you until the child is in school

you also mentioned that you tried dating well good for you

keep on dating trust me you will find a better man

don't trust this dude he sounds mental

I wish I could say some thing positive but by what you wrote this dude is crazy not only that but you pored out your hart to him and he is still gone  do to him like he dose to you

disappear  

poof!!

ps

you sound like a nice girl I wish I new you I would never leave you

From you friend

Toxicink.

Answer 2

Ok, I didnt even read the entire saga, however, men pull away when things get too emotional because they dont know how to deal with it. Men like to feel like they can do anything and they are completely lost when trying to deal with emotional issues. You have to make it easy for him-whatever that means concerning your relationship. If he really cares about you and the relationship, he'll stick around to work it out.

Answer 3

My painful experience in a 23-year old marriage that I just got fed up with the rigid and painful patterns. Some men AVOID and/or DENY emotions.  In my case, I allowed myself to deny that my needs were not being met until I finally decided that my relationship is highly toxic.  Remember, you don't marry a man to change him; it may sound trite but it is very true.  Be true to #1--You!