Why do some parents who homeschool their children feel that their kids are superior to those taught by..?

Question

Public schools? Now, I didn't say all and I didn't say many, I said SOME. There is a woman that I work with and she's constantly gloating about how well her child is doing and that I probably didn't learn or know half of the information that she was being taught (woman I worked with wasn't the one doing the homeschooling, but it was her child). Anyway, I found that really rude seeing as how I learn quite a bit of new information each year in public school (I'm going into 11th). I'm not trying to argue that public schooling is better than home schooling, but I don't see where some parents (and homeschooled kids sometimes) get off telling public school taught children and their parents that their daughter/son is better/smarter/etc./etc. There's very few people I know that go to public school like I do that would gloat about how much better public school is than homeschool, because most of us quite frankly don't care, but I've heard tons of stories from relatives, etc. of homeschooled parents/kids putting their friends/co-workers publicschooled kids down.

Answer 1

Well the parent sees himself as paying money to give his child the best knowledge blah blah

its actually quiet normal for parents to act like that i dont know why human nature ? Most people who act like that are the ones who werent fortune and suddenly got what they wanted .. ignore them

and these kids grow up without being able to communicate and deal with people .. now you can just prove youre better than them

Answer 2

I don't really understand it either unless they are feel that somehow their child.s performance makes them look better. I homeschool, my kids are average and I love the flexibility that our family enjoys. My son is working on his work today so we can hit the beach tomorrow and miss all the crowds.

Best of Luck!

Jana

http://www.purehomeschooling.com/

Answer 3

Here is my take: some, not all, home school parents judge themselves against the failures of others.  Since they believe that schools are failing their children, they've jumped to the faulty conclusion that all kids in school are failures and that their children must therefore be a great success.  Those parents haven't learned the critical thinking skills yet to measure their children's successes.  They should measure their children's success by their accomplishments, not by the failure of others.  Look at it this way, just because I get an "F" on an exam, doesn't mean that you necessarily get an "A".  You might have earned a "C-".  

There are also home school parents who feel the need to justify their decisions because their motivations to home school are questioned. But why should they justify the decision? It is theirs to make and not others to question.  

As for the lady you work with,  It's like that Shakespeare quote "thou dost protest too much"...If her daughter is really that educated, she doesn't need to prove it to you.  Your opinion should be of no interest to her. She shouldn't need your applause.  Outside opinions don't make her a better mother or teacher.  Next time she starts to boast, cut her off with something like, "I'd rather not discuss this now - I'd really like to get to work".

Answer 4

Because most are evangelical Christians, who also think that they are superior to other people and hide behind that fact with a "humble" face claiming to care about your and other people's souls. They only care about themselves and their personal families, outsiders are taboo!

Answer 5

   I  get stirred up when people put home schooling down.   My natural tendency is to snap back with a rebuttal.  It doesn't happen often but when it does, I am going to defend  our decision to homeschool.

One person told me that the competition of making good grades would be good for my 11th grade son.  My son  was in public school until 8th grade and good grades meant nothing to him.  He had friends who made good grades and they did his homework for him.  How competitive is that?

One lady expressed herself with the concern that my son was missing out on the prom and all the fun things that juniors and seniors do in high school.   My son dates a public high school girl and can attend her prom, IF that were important to him.   He has a full social calendar and tons of friends.  He actually has time for fun because of his.homeschooling schedule

So, in answer to your question.  Many homeschoolers are on the defensive.  I expect the criticism of homeschool comes from people who actually have no experience with homeschool and base their ideas on archaic notions.

I see the same kind of pride that we take in our homeschooling among various schools in our public school system.   Public school kids argue between themselves which school has the best social  programs, sports teams, and academic advantages.

We are proud of our homeschool and proud to be able to control our schedules and curriculum.

Answer 6

People have a tendency to believe their children are better than others.  Because there is an emotional attachment, and their own kids are more important to them, they sometimes feel that they are "better" than others.

I've heard this from both sides.  Parents of public schooled, and private schooled kids do this as often as homeschooling parents.  People in general just gloat about their kids.

:D

Answer 7

Personally, I don't. I don't even know anyone who goes to a public school or whose kid goes to a public school and I very much doubt either of my parents know anyone associated with the public school system. The only public school within about 500 kms of my house was closed down approx. seven years before I was born.

All I know is that when I did once go to school, the teacher tried to tell me that twins were the same age and therefore neither one was older than the other!! Well, I may have been only 7 yrs old and just 'down from the bush' but even I knew that what she was telling me was a whole heap of bulldust and twins are *not* the same age; one twin is always older than the other if only by a minute or two. And that was from a teacher in the prep school of a supposedly academic school in a country which routinely scores considerably higher than the USA in the various International Education Surveys & Educational Attainment Surveys.

Oh, and believe me, if you find 'some parents (and homeschooled kids sometimes) get off telling public school taught children and their parents that their daughter/son is better/smarter/etc./etc'......that is definitely no more and no worse than the innumerable public school kids and parents who get off telling home-educated kids and their parents that their daughter/son is some sort of anti-social, deprived, friendless freak with no hope of a future and no social life who is doomed to grow up to be incapable of emotionally separating from their parents and/or resenting their parents for somehow ruining their life, their future, their childhood etcetera, even though the overwhelming majority of peer reviewed evidence points to the contrary. You've only got to take a look at some of the opinionated (and uncited; they're *always* uncited) comments which get posted on just this one board by public schoolers on an almost daily basis to see that.

Answer 8

First, Casey, children do NOT need public school in order to learn how to socialize.  They can learn that quite well without going to public school...and much better I might add.  (Sorry to prove the author's point, but you have proved mine by proxy.)

My point is that homeschoolers often will tell how well their children are doing or speak of their homeschooling because they are often asked to justify their choice by non-homeschoolers.  This may not be the case in your situation.  However, many homeschoolers get so used to having to justify their choice that it just becomes automatic.  The parents of "traditional-schooled" students don't typically have to justify their choices so it's hard for them to understand why we would be asked to do this...yet they'll then turn around and ask us to justify our choice.  

Most of the time, it's innocent.  They'll ask, "Is it easy to homeschool?", "How do you know your children are getting the education they need?", "How do you know they're equal to their peers", or the ever-popular, "What about socialization?".  However, there are those who will point-blank say, "You can't possibly be giving your child a good education if you're not a certified-teacher."  Thereby putting you in a position to either ignore them, or justify your education choice.

How each homeschooler chooses to handle this is different.  Regardless, I would hope it is handled with love and grace.  If it has not been, I apologize.  It should have been.  If you're not asking her anything about homeschooling and she's constantly bothering you, then you may just have to ask her to please stop.

Answer 9

It's nothing at all to do with HS, some parents are like that with their PS kids too. They don't gloat about PS itself of course, just how their son is on the football team or their daughter won the spelling bee, or is doing soooo well at piano classes {picture nose in the air}. I've seen it with pre-schoolers, the parents just love showing off that their 4 year old can write their own name, like it's a Nobel prize! It's simply in the nature of some people to be like that. Go figure.

p.s. mcc - 7 points of total bunk.

Answer 10

There are some parents who think their children are superior to other children in all walks of life.  Some people are just that way.  

Answer 11

While it isn't very polite, I wouldn't take it personally if I were you. Homeschoolers and homeschool parents are almost constantly being criticized for their educational choices. A lot of them deal with family members, neighbors, even close friends telling them it's wrong and their kids will be behind and not learn anything and be outcasts and so on, usually not really knowing a thing about homeschooling but just making assumptions. Some homeschool families have even experienced the dreadful situation of a friend or neighbor calling Child Protective Services because they're convinced that homeschooling a child should be illegal and that not sending a child to public school is abuse. Of course the kids usually don't get taken away as homeschooling in itself is not at all abusive, but can you see the point? Most homeschool families can take these comments in stride, even the ones that are addressed directly to their children "Do you want to be stupid when you grow up? You'll never have a real friend"... But there are some of course who are wounded by it and end up building up this shield of success stories and reasons why homeschoolers are better and ways to put public schoolers down. It's not right, but it is a defense mechanism. When you find yourself defending your educational choices and freedoms on a daily basis, it's easy to slip into the habit of just trying to make it known that your way is working before anyone says anything.

Something you could do is maybe tell your co worker this. "I'm not against homeschooling. I know it's working wonderfully for your child and I know it works wonderfully for many children. But we all have educational freedom, and my family chose public school. Everyone is different and for me, Public school is working wonderfully. I dont try to put you and your child down for homeschooling, so can you please stop doing it to me for public schooling." And let it end there.  

Answer 12

its in a parent's nature 2 brag about their kids especially when they're homeschooled bcuz they can c their child's progress and make them learn more quickly. im not excusing them but frankly i agree with u no one cares and its rude for people 2 think that homeschooled kids r superior 2 public schooled kids. besides if ur homeschooled ur only learning half of what u learn in public school. in homeschools they only teach u about wat u need 2 learn 2 get the grade. in public schools u learn wat u need 2 get the grade and learn how 2 get through life. they cant teach that in homeschools because u have 2 experience it.

Answer 13

The couple of things that I think Homeschool students are significantly lacking is:

1 - the ability to apply facts and knowledge to real life problem solving.

2 - people skills and I don't mean social interaction I mean the ability to deal with icky people, bullies, mean people, in other words how to navigate life.

3 - the ability to have to work with people you may not agree with or have as friends (a valuable work and life skill)

4 - the ability to be able to advocate for or defend their opinion with others who do not agree

5 - the access to information that may not be 'approved' in their homeschool curriculum but having exposure allows you to see that all things are not just black and white.  You better understand the shades of grey.

6 - the understanding of the concept of 'paying your dues' and some humility when starting a new job - 'some' are so arrogant that they are impossible (although truth be told that is not limited to only  homeschool students)

7 - the ability to work in group process with people who may not have the same values or criteria as you.

PS for those of you who think that what I have stated is bunk - try to supervise or manage some homeschooled students as adults sometime - they have great knowledge but little skill in working with others.  Whomever is doing the homeschooling needs to figure out how to address that issue during any instruction.

Answer 14

I don't think my children are superior to any other children. I do think their education is superior to the education the children in our state receive in the public schools.  The school system in our area has a high drop out rate (20%), and many gang problems, causing teachers to have to focus on more on discipline than academics. We have a very high rate of private school attendance and homeschooling here. Most homeschoolers in our area do not homeschool for religious reasons.

Answer 15

I certainly don't think my kids are superior, but I do KNOW that the education they received being home schooled was far superior to what they got when they were in the public school system.  There are some very good public schools that have wonderful teachers, but they just weren't in the district we lived in.  I wonder if some of the "superiority" issue you have gotten is from people who have been bullied by others who are anti-home school.

Answer 16

Because they can concentrate on teaching their own kids. In schools, it is different because it is a group of kids; sometimes a big group and so the attention given may not be enough. Intelligence differs from one kid to another. So their kids owe it to their parents for teaching them well in homeschool.  

Answer 17

Oh its their way to try and justify that home schooling is better then public both have their advantages but really kids need public school to learn to socialize, and interact with kids their own age.

Answer 18

If you are a homeschool parent it's natural to want to brag about your student/child.

Sorry if that person makes you feel bad.  I don't think they are trying to attack you verbally.

Answer 19

The same reason some public school parents gloat that their children are superior to homeschool kids.

In an group, you are going to find some jerks.

The vast majority of homeschool parents spend their lives biting their tongues while their educational choice is dragged through the mud.  

All the best.

Answer 20

Because they (the parents) want to prove that they're superior to the professional teachers.