Why do some people always say, "I'm so sorry" when they hear of someone divorcing?

Question

I mean, obviously they're getting a divorce for a reason and it's more than likely going to "better" themselves or their children or both.

Answer 1

Cuz it's a hard situation to go through. No matter what happened in a marriage, its never the case that it was 100% bad. You're grieving the loss of a partnership, a relationship and a stable life. Why WOULDN'T you say "im so sorry"?

Answer 2

mostly they don't know what else to say and they just want to be supportive.

Answer 3

Well, why does someone say "I'm sorry" when you hear that someone got laid off, or fired, from their job?  Even if they get a better job eventually, don't you think that it is hard facing the fact that you failed at something?

Should we throw a party instead?

==edit==

The women who got angry at you because you were simply trying to be nice (by saying "I'm sorry") sound like they were b*tches anyway.  Obviously that is why their marriage failed in the first place.

Answer 4

It's a standard cookie-cutter response; they should not have been offended. It's just a figure of speech for expressing your concern with their well-being. You can't possibly be expected to know all the intricacies of their relationship, but divorce is never a pleasant experience - even when you are better off without each other, you are still letting go of something, some dream you had long ago of being together, and this is what the generic "I'm sorry" covers. The couple was out of line, and the very fact they took offense says to me that their emotions were very raw and they we not so glad and happy with the situation - they were simply trying to convince themselves they were.

Answer 5

its just because a relationship is over and when it is recently still hurts, and we say im sorry cause theres no other way for saying i know u r in pain , i cant help u but im with u , cause just the person who is divorcing can get over the pain.

Answer 6

It doesn't stop it from being a hard time for that person.  One can still feel sorry that their marriage didn't end up being what they hoped it would and feel sorry that they had to go through the hardship of divorce.

Answer 7

Whether the divorce is something desired by one or both involved, it's still a very hard thing to go through...I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I wanted out of my divorce, but I was still very saddened by it....it's the end of something most really wished could have worked...I mean, who gets married thinking they will divorce? I'm sure nobody does. So, saying "I'm so sorry to hear that" is totally understandable to me. I am sorry it didn't work for them, sorry that person has to go through the stress of it and sorry that the kids have to go through it. Even though it can be an ending of chaos for some, it's the end of something that started out happy....and to me, that is sad and worth saying I'm sorry for.  

Answer 8

don't you think it's sad when people lived their lives in love with someone and then they end it? thats why people say i'm so sorry..because it's HARD

Answer 9

they are sorry that the relationship didn't work out...not for divorcing.

Answer 10

Because divorce is very traumatic regardless of whether it's a mutual decision.  It has a terrible effect on everyone initially.  Not everyone parts on good terms, and many times people end up divorced because the other spouse left them, not because they, themselves, wanted the marriage to end.

Answer 11

I say when you were getting married, you were in love. When you divorced, you lost that love. That was sad so people say"sorry".

Answer 12

I rather hear that. Some people keep asking me "Are you still married?"

Yes, I'm still married...why is That hard to believe? You don't have to like my husband...I chose him, not you.

Answer 13

They say it due to the death of the relationship- not the divorce.

Answer 14

Because you pledged your life to this person. You put your effort and heart into it for many years. No one wants to be alone or go through the heartache of splitting up with a partner.