Why do some women have their kids with jerks, then expect to find a nice guy to help raise the children?

Question

I am in my 30's and keep running into this.

I meet these women that have children by these alchoholic, druggy, in and out of jail guys, then decide once they have all their "love trophies" with these people, it's time to find the nice guy to help raise these kids with.

Don't get me wrong...I think the kids are okay, and it is not their fault. Don't women realize they are ruining themselves for good men by hooking up with losers when they are younger?

Why should we spend our resources on another man's child, instead of carrying on our own bloodline?

Answer 1

Woman make bad choices just as some men do, and we all grow up and don't want to repeat the same c**p we did while we were young.

I do know that women do have alot of kids while they are young by the losers and can't have anymore. Then expect good men to take care of them as their own. I say to men head for the hills.. Let her have it when she opens her mouth and askes what is wrong with her.

Answer 2

Because they as young girls had no self-esteem and hail from dysfunctional families.  They were socialised to believe that men are superior to women and that their value  as human beings lay in their physical appearance.  They tend to be uneducated and poor.  It takes time and life experience for them to grow up and out of this mental ghetto.

I am in my fourties and don't know any girls like this but I know they exist: they end up doing their grocery shopping at the local food bank.

Answer 3

I can't pretend to understand what those women are like or why they do this. maybe they think having a baby will make the guy change or something. i dont know. some men are nice tell the girl has a kid than they are jerks after. if that happends i dont think its the womans fault. but i hate seeing women having so many kids like that and then think a good guy is going to come along and clean up thier mess. i think the good guys should find a good girl and have kids. even if the girl has one or two already than just make sure she wasn't in with a guy that was in jail or any of those things. you dont have to go out with them if you dont want to. just fall inlove. but those guys need a good kick in the as# and the girl needs a wake up call.

Answer 4

I guess I would accept the child if I really loved the mother.   Bloodlines aren't all that special.    I'm a woman and only have reminders from my marriage (all grown).

I really think we should have these devices implanted at 10 and not activated until 25-30.   They would prevent pregnancy and wipe out the past.

Answer 5

Thank you for saying "SOME women"..this certainly does not apply to me nor anyone I know. If you avoid such women, it does not make you a bad person. Though I never say never, I don't see under what circumstance I would consider dating a man with children, way too much baggage. Some people call my standards selfish, but that is their concern not mine.

Answer 6

You shouldn't.  Why do they do it?  Because they can.  Obviously, you shouldn't let it put you off the right woman, but otherwise just avoid them if that's not what you want :-)

Answer 7

I so agree, woman put themselves in these impossible situations that makes them dependant on these jerk guys that leave us and our children .

Most men dont want to raise another mans children but ALOT of men step up and do raise others children , I applaud that and dont think they are being chumps or fools.

But i agree that woman need to be smarter about who and what kind of men they let in their lives.

Answer 8

Because when you start having s*x before you are a grown adult, you make poor choices.

Should the woman and her child be punished for poor choices, or could we applaud her efforts to change herself and her life to seek something better for the child?

If you don't want to participate in that you don't have to.

Answer 9

One of many ultimate female reproductive strategies.

Answer 10

exactly! dont even bother with those s***s, get urself a  younger woman who doesnt have any baggage or STDs.

Answer 11

i have no clue but my mom does this and its so dumb! i hate it

Answer 12

lack of self confidence in some women drives them like this