Why do we fall in love with the people who can't love us back?

Question

Why do we fall in love with the people who can't love us back?

Answer 1

ahhh i know exactly know you feel right at this moment hurts like h**l doesnt it

Answer 2

for the learning experience..  the  challenge..  and  getting to know  another person  intimately!!...

Answer 3

Because we're human.

Answer 4

because thats life, full of rejection :(

Answer 5

Because we are stupid and long for emotional abuse. @_@

Answer 6

Well, I've never had a serious case of this, but I do know that last year I had a crush on a teacher who was around eight years older than me (yes, he was actually a teacher-in-training, but doesn't that count?). I liked him because he was everything I liked about a boy, but I never had to worry about getting to close to him. I have to problem with relationships with people older/ younger than you, but still, it was fun to have a crush on him!

I guess what I'm trying to say is, even though he probably couldn't love me back, I still liked him. You don't fall in love with people with the first thought in your mind "Are they going to love me back?" (Okay, sometimes that is the first question), but the real question is, "What do I love about them? *lists off reasons in head*".

Answer 7

You're question is so rational!!! Unfortunately, we fall in love with our hearts, not our heads.

Answer 8

you know you remind me of a song of t.a.t.u the russian band . i only want what i can't have .. i only need what i don't want

Answer 9

I don't know.  I wish we didn't, though there's a certain measure of pleasure to be gained from knowing that there is someone who is as wonderful as you can imagine out there... somewhere... even if you can't be with them.  There's also a lot of heartache of course.  :o(

Answer 10

So we can have the fantasy. In a strange way, it's actually safer isn't it?

We fall for someone, knowing that they can never love us back, and that's where we stay...trapped in a fantasy and daydreaming about them, And even though it pains us to be in that position, the actual person can't really hurt us cause we don't have them to begin with. Does that make sense?

Answer 11

Some people are hopeless romantics. What's more tragic and romantic than a love unrequited? I'm not saying "you" are, but just saying. I've been guilty of that very thing on occasion. Sometimes it's not so much falling in love as it is falling in love with the fascination of falling in love with someone. I think there is a fine line there. Perhaps.

Why do some people like to fornicate with a Chicken-Pot-Pie? Well, Ok, I guess that's not quite the same thing. (I'm sleepy, sorry)

And sometimes people are accustomed to rejection and sorrow and out of familiarity with it both consciously and unconsciously arrange or fall into disappointing situations.

Or maybe someone's just really hot and you can't help it. =P Happens to everyone, I guess.

I don't suppose that helped at all, did it? *hugs*

Answer 12

I don't know. Ive been hearing that a lot lately. Thank god I don't let myself do that...I'm not willing to set myself up for heart break and rejection.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=OBiW44cWu4...

Song that reminded me of this question

;p

Answer 13

Cause thats the typical curse of a LGBT person now or days

Answer 14

Because the chase in half the fun. :]

Answer 15

I know the feeling, i know the feeling. i'm going though it RIGHT NOW. sometimes i feel like my gf just does not know me. I don't know why we fall in love with the ones that don't love us. its sure hurts though

Answer 16

I don't know... but I have the same annoying habit. :/

Slowly growing out of it, though.

Answer 17

I ask myself that everyday.

I always fall for someone who doesn't love me or even like me :/

Answer 18

Why do u have to ask this question???....you are making me depressed again.....

Answer 19

It's part of the mystique of love. To want something you know you can't have makes it all the more alluring and exciting. I'll end here.

Answer 20

Perhaps, because we sometime misunderstood admiration with love.....

Answer 21

you should ask my boyfriend that....

Answer 22

I seem to have a knack for this ability. I always find the losers. It's like I have a neon sign on my forehead that says "Losers Apply Here". It sucks, but I still believe that there is someone out there that wants to love me just as much as I want to love them. Fear not, you will find yours when the time is right.

Answer 23

i know it hurts it happen 2 me twice from my friends brother and  he left me 4 another girl  then he left her 4 my cousin i guess its just the person  or something  they don't know how to love

Answer 24

or maybe that's not love at all, we just feel like being challenged and we have to prove that they could love us. who knows? nobody could even point out what real love is?

Answer 25

Why?  I'm not entirely sure I can answer that.  We love the people that cannot love us perhaps out of compassion; the fact that nothing can happen makes the idea more tender and sweet.  Perhaps we do so out of desire of the forbidden.  Yet we may fall for these people because we can love them fully.  While they may not be able to receive any love, they can also not be ready to reject it.  The love grows inside of us unbounded.  Or, maybe our love simply sucks away all the love they could possibly get for us; put simply- we might be hogging all of the love!

Sometimes the people can't love us back, because they are fictional...  don't worry Aladdin, I don't care that you're a beggar.  You could be MY beggar...  just wish for me...

Whoops!  I trailed off at the end.  =)

Answer 26

i always think about it too...... must be like nolovephobia or like stayawaywhensomeonelovesyoubackphobia...... ....i dont know i was in a rush to know but now i just dont care anymore its annoying those are the kind of people who cant be in a relationship

Answer 27

I know what u mean why does chris have to come between me and Tara J lol

seriously i guess cause we don't choose who we fall in love with it happens when we least expect it and with the person we least expect

Answer 28

Hi, I don't think it is something we choose to do, it is almost out of our control, sadly it happened to me, I became infatuated without knowing and my perception painted a beautiful reality that I thought was there, but it came as shock when I discovered that my eyes were fogged by something I yearned to have.

So, I think depending on the person, the reasons of wanting love maybe different, but love is a beautiful thing when you find it, you'd want to share it with people you care about & know, and sometimes with people you don't even know.

Strangely, it's one of those mysteries in life, I still cannot explain why I felt so strongly for this girl in my class, I thought I had a soulful connection with her, and this holiday I found out on her profile that she was interested in Men- so it really hurt, but I must let go

(thinking of Bonnie Raitt's song lyrics in my head: ''I can't make you love me, If you don't, You can't make your heart feel something it won't''),

it's difficult because I let this take me so deeply that my Heart started to dance or her, so in little steps I walk away, hoping for a rainbow to save me from sadness.