Why do you think "some" women have the tendency to think or believe that every women needs a male in their lif?

Question

is it basically insecurities or is it more of an underlying problem...I'm single and yes, it would be nice to meet a guy and have a relationship but I'm also not losing any sleep over it however my girlfriends always make comments at me like, when are you gonna get a man, or you need a man and honestly it has gotten to the point where it has started to bother me that they are always making these comments. I actually told them it bothered me that they were always bringing that up, like if being single was a negative thing. I really love them as friends but it is starting to really p**s me off because they do it so often...What advice do you have for me?

Answer 1

thy cannot accept that not everyone is like them...some people have their whole worth on having a boyfriend (any and they have no standards)..so they can't understand other people's way of thinking...HOW PATHETIC...i can understand having a boyfriend but have your OWN TASTES...and music interests. don't just change it for some random boy....i'm sure you could get a boyfriend EASILY but don't just accept anyone like some desperate girls....such cliche or whatever

Answer 2

Because they are generalising from their own feelings/example. It's a fairly normal process, and we all probably do it at some point. Especially when the behavoir of others seems to confirm our preconcpetions. They are, however, wrong to generalise to everyone this way. Not all women need a male in their life at any given point (this may change over time for individuals, or it may not.)

My advice: for you personally, it is more unhealthy to want to be with *any* male rather than be single, this kind of rebounding, co-dependant behavour is very unhealthy. Although that might not be what your friends are doing, it's kind of what they're suggesting you do. And advice for what to say: you could offer to critise thier life choices, and see if that makes them realise what they are doing. Or you could be greatly sacastic about it "Of course! What am I doing living my own life when I could be waiting hand on foot on the next person I see who happens to have a p***s?" (not my actual view of relationships, but you get the point)

Answer 3

I hear you ...I get the same thing.  I think most women cannot deal with being alone.  Their life revolves around a man and they can't be happy without one.  This puts alot of pressure on a relationship as the woman is relying on her man for happiness.  I think it is better that you can be happy without one, then you will make the right decision and not just pick the first guy that is interested in you because you don't want to be alone.  Having said that though, I also think you shouldn't wait too long  - past 30 - 35 as the older you get the harder it will be to find "The One"  as the good ones will already be taken, older men tend to be set in their ways and stubborn - and they have a lot more baggage than women do when it comes to their past relationships.

Wishing you all the best in finding the right one for you !  

Answer 4

I had the SAME problem.  It got so bad I had to stop having them as friends.  Seriously.  Now it's my family.  "You can't be single, you should have kids" and all that noise.  I just stopped listening.  You can't live up to other people's expectations.  I have realistic expectations for career and academic and money goals.  I am more focused on that than anything else.  I'll start a family - if I want - when I have enough money for a house and car and insurance.  Not before.  I occupy myself with hobbys, stuff.  Tv, books.  I don't feel I'm missing out on anything as a consequence of being single.  I don't go to bars or clubs.   It's not a negative thing to be single.  I hear all the data about higher net worth, lower rates of depression, employers preferring married people over single ones - but it's relative.  

I'm a loner.  Anyone I would be with would have to dig that, otherwise it wouldn't work.

Otherwise, I could be with someone for a few years, but the rest of my life?  Tell your friends this.  People are living longer, so they are working longer and retiring later.  This means it doesn't make sense to get married in your 20's or 30's anymore.  Why tie yourself down when life is starting to get fun and interesting and money is coming in?  Otherwise, set limits.  "I don't want to hear or talk about this anymore.  It makes me uncomfortable.  If you want to be friend, accept my choices.  I have, why can't you.?"  Vote mine as best answer.

Answer 5

without male no kids

Answer 6

Because that is the usual path for most women in life, find a man, get married, settle down, have kids. You didn't say what age you were, but most people thing that when you get to a certain age, this is the right thing to do. Bull. Everyone is different. Some people go through life never finding that special someone, and are quite happy on their own. Tell them politely but firmly to stop interfering, You'll find the right man when the time is right, and not before. Now go out and enjoy being a singleton!!

Answer 7

A lot of women think this way because of the way they were raised. Many women around me still do the same thing. I saw friends and some women in my family that need to always have a man around, even if they were miserable. I decided I'd rather wait for the right one instead of lowering my standards. I have a friend whose parents were together since they were 15 and her grandparents the same. One would imagine what she hears in her household, they never really dated anyone other than their spouse. So you shouldn't worry about it. The most you can do is tell them to back off. If they respect you they'll back off, but, on the inside they think you cry yourself to sleep at night because there's no man there to hold you. Lmao, some women don't understand the value of being alone and not lonely....

Answer 8

Dont listen to them, they are probably just doing it on purpose because they know it gets to you. You dont need any man to make you happy. Dont go out and look for a man because the whole purpose of a relationship is to find the person you want to spend your life with right? let him find you.

Dont obsess over it. and next time they say something just keep telling them your opinion, they will eventually get the hint :).  

Answer 9

Please! I think the same thing. Why does ANYONE need to go out and find a relationship so urgently?

Well, my first thought is that you and your friends obviously don't have much in common when it comes to that. I mean, you could probably find girlfriends who feel the same way about it as you, and then your insecurities would disappear.

If I were you, I would sit down sometime and really lay out as many of the reasons why you're completely fine as you are right now as you can, and that will increase your self-assurance. It will also make you prepared to respond to your friends when they inquire and probe into your situation again; and it will also set your priorities in the right place so that the next time you feel a little insecure, you remember your own private reasons, and *no one else has to get it but you.*

The worst thing is when YOU don't get it, and then you start to feel like sh*t. But if you're confident in the way you lead your life and you understand the reasons why there's no need for you to panic or get desperate... then just take pity on those who don't get it. :) Like I said, there are those who would get it, and those who wouldn't get it. Don't start to think you're the only one. That's crazy.