Why do you think some people fear open records or think they are a bad idea?

Question

Why do you think some people fear open records or think they are a bad idea?

Answer 1

Probably because they don't want their child to end up hating them or pushing them away because they're not biologically theirs.

Answer 2

I was adopted at age 9 from an orphanage where my mother dumped me and my sister at age 4 [Gran died].

Our adoption was closed record - in our 20s, my sister and I hired an enquiry agent [private investigator] and he tracked down our birth mother. We flew to where she was and met her. It was a total disaster. Among other totally inappropriate behaviors, she flew into a rage when we declined to give her all our money.

Thereafter, the only contact we had from her was her insisting on a handout. My sister was in therapy for years.

When you ask why some people fear open records, I can answer, from direct experience, that we don't want to be harassed by "relatives" hitting us up.

Answer 3

Oh, what tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.

There are plenty of tidbits to hide from agencies who've been less than scrupulous, to public figures who don't want their indiscretions known.

Answer 4

Hi Jgf,

Most adoptees believe equal access to birth records is a good idea.  Those who don't are under no obligation to access theirs.  Many natural and adoptive family members also support equal rights for adoptees and for all citizens.

The ones who do not support it appear to fall under one of the following groups:

1) Adoptive parents - The ones who do not support open records generally come from the older generations that followed the mindset preached decades ago by the adoption industry that sealing the records completely erases the adoptee's other family and makes him/her more the adopter's.  Some adoptive parents may feel they still need sealed records to insure them a place in the adoptee's hearts.  This is not realistic and appears to be about meeting the needs of an adopter who would think that, rather than the adoptee.  

2) The adoption industry - This includes the agency social workers, the adoption attorneys, everyone who makes a lucrative living off of legally brokering babies.  Their reasons include both a fear of losing business, and a fear of past wrongdoings being exposed.  By the way, they are right - sealed records do shove dirty little secrets & lies under the carpet.  Interestingly enough, they will never cite any of that as their true motives.  They will tell you they are protecting the adult adoptees & the natural families from each other!  They employ expensive lobby groups to try to keep records from adoptees.  Do you really think they would do that if not to protect their own interests?

3)  There are some members of the general public who do not fully understand adoption.  All they know is what they hear in the media or they may remotely know a member of an adoptive family.  Once they really educate themselves on the realities of adoption, they seem to move to the supportive side of the issue.  For example, there are misconceptions out there such as all adoptees automatically receive their records at age 18 or 21.  That is only true in 6 states.  Another is that open adoption means open records.  It does not.  Many people don't know that birth records are permanently sealed upon a finalization of an adoption in both open & closed adoptions.  One of the biggest myths is that natural mothers do not want to be found.  Over 95% do!

The truths are getting out there, slowly but surely.  Change is inevitable.  All the fears that were predicted to occur in the states that have open records, have not happened.  Kansas & Alaska have always had open records.  Nothing bad has ever happened.  They have lower than average abortion rates and higher than average adoption rates.  Nothing bad has happened in Oregon or the other states either.  For over 30 years, records have been open in other countries such as the UK and in Australia with no ill effects whatsoever.  Read the Evan B. Donaldson report that explains there is nothing to fear with restoring rights to adoptees.  (link below)  They are an independent group that has done extensive research over many years, based on real, hard evidence, and they are recommending restoring rights to all adoptees in all states.  

To sum it up, there is nothing to fear.  It is a matter of equal rights for all citizens.  Restoring adult adoptee's rights back to what everyone else has is the right thing to do.  Thanks for asking.

julie j

reunited adoptee

Answer 5

I was adopted in 84 from Washington state (at 3 days old)... With the right that when I turned 18, I could open the records.... well... laws have changed, and it's just not that easy... I now live in Georgia (and I have since I was 14) and in order to open my records... I have to buy a plane ticket... fly up there.... get the court to sign a petition to let me see the records... once I get up there, I don't even know how long all the legal work will take... All I want to do is thank my birth parents!!!  even if they want nothing to do with me!  I just want to say THANK YOU, for loving me enough to let a family who could take care of me and could provide for me, have me!  Even if I get a door shut in my face, I want then to know I owe my life to them, and I can never thank them enough!!!