Why does cyberstalker try to invert the situation?

Question

saying that she was being stalked and she has proven folders against the stalked... so mad that...

Answer 1

Are you being stalked by someone online? Or do you know someone who is stalking another person? Who is mad? The reason I am asking these questions is that I am not clear if you are being stalked and I was stalked for 3 years by one person, a few years ago. Let me tell you the basics: This chick would always turn the situation around and blame me. It is rare to have a female stalk a female, but it happens and she was a nut!

She would make me feel guilty for not answering her emails and I was not even home and near a PC to see her emails! She would follow me online and respond in usenet groups right after I did. I thought I was doing something wrong or going nuts!

Finally, I got the nerve to tell some mutual people we knew what was happening. I was told she did it to them too. So there are at least FIVE others and I witnessed what she did to them. One of my friends said that I should just ignore her emails like she did, but she would never tell me the details of what happened. Once I finally told people what was happening, I found out I was not the only one she did this to!

She even took it to RL and wanted to know my last name, complaining that she needed to know since we were "friends", and since she already had my phone number (yes, I was stupid to give it to her b/c she pressured me to do it), I eventually had to change my number b/c she would call and harass me. She threatened to call-my-elderly-mother for crying out loud. This lady was in her -forties- and I was messed up over that stress.

The way she would -invert- the situation is to say or type well, "I have emails from you that say..." or she would make-up-things and post in forums.

Everyone, listen, if YOU are being stalked, you need to change some things and where you hang out. If you have to make a MySpace account Private, do it! You need to give the person absolutely NO attention whatsoever, or it will never go away. I hid. I changed my emails. I changed my phone number. And, just to be safe, I changed my last name legally a few months ago. Hah!

Be careful and give the person NO attention. The internet is big enough for you to hide, if you need to go that far. Please be careful who you give info out to and remember that people are not always who they appear to be. Be very careful what you share about yourself. It could be dangerous as I'm sure you know, and I don't want to see anyone hurt. Be safe!

Added note:  To answer your question, no, I could not sue this person because in 2000-2004 there were not too many cyberstalking laws that could help me. All I could do was to report it to her Internet Service Provider as abuse. Even then, I had to explain how it was not just ONE email it was the combination of ALL of her behaviors. Yes, I am very safe now, thank you.

You said the person that is being stalked is an "ex", and I say he should hide. Hiding is easy on the internet, and there are also better laws now for justice, but he needs to keep that private and keep records. Tell him that when he is provoked to not respond at all. This makes the stalker happy that she got attention from him. That's what she wants, a reaction. I hope this helps. Good luck.