Why does it bother me so much?

Question

Im 21 and it still bothers me when my parents fight, is this normal?. I have always had a close relatiosnhip with my family and it really gets to me when my parents firght. I am not a cofrontational person..i hate fighting..i'd rather sit down and talk about my issues than having an argument. It really affects me and it makes me depressed to think they are fighting.. i know it's normal for couples to fight but they have been arguing a lot lately.

Answer 1

thats very normal

but when ure a much younger teenager or kid

it can freak u out more

but since ur already 21 , try to get over it and ull be ok

also , ure already old enuf so u can try n stop the fight

open ur own voice n tell how much u hate it when they fight

and that u love ur family n will do anything to nver bring it down !

ull be ok

good luck !

Answer 2

I agree with the way you are feeling. Do they know how it affects you? The fact is, we are all imperfect and we won't normally hurt those we love. I know they love you so if they can see how their behaviour affects you, they may tone it down. Tell them, seperately, hot it is affecting you. I won't say they will change because that is a tall order but they may think about the way they are behaving. Hope this little message helps.

Answer 3

Hi,my husband & I always argue.It will be our 36th wedding anniversary

on monday.i like a good argument it keeps things going.You are sensitive next time your mam & dad argue go out.

Good Luck

Answer 4

it is a shame your parents aren't as grown as your self i am a mum and married and i don't fight with my husband  martha's mum

Answer 5

It is always going to bother you, but if they have issues try to avoid them. married couples can work it out. Maybe there is money problems or just certain things going on.

Answer 6

I always hated that, too. It is not your job to be their peacemaker or pick sides, though. Try to stay out of it as much as you can. I know it sucks, but some couples are just that way. At least you've learned one thing you DON'T want in a relationship!

Answer 7

I would have to say yes this is normal. Even at 21 or 40 you still care about your parents and worry about arguing and fighting leading to a break up. You should approach your parents and tell them that their heated arguing makes you sad and discuss with them different ways they can communicate with each other. Or perhaps ask them if they can refrain from doing it in front of you.

I'm 41 and I have been married for almost 17 years. We try very hard not to argue in front of our kids, but some times it is hard.

You have a right to be sad about it, but you do have to remember, there really is nothing you can do. They are adults as are you so even though it's normal to worry, you need to step back and let them work out their problems themselves.  

Answer 8

Don't worry so much about it. I mean,it's normal to argue in a relationship but if your really feeling concerned about it then maybe you should sit down with your parents and tell them how their arguments are effecting you. I hope this helps!!!!!!

GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. This is just what I would do if I was in you situation!!!!! :-)

Answer 9

Just remember it is their issues, not yours. This is actually the healthy way for them to air their problems instead of holding them in and exploding and causing a great deal of damage to their marriage. When they fight, stay out of their way, but always be kind and supportive to both of them.  Just be a good daughter to them.