Why does love hurt so much?

Question

Why does love hurt so much?

Answer 1

love dosnt hurt at all you got to know how to use it

Answer 2

The word "love" must be understood with the concept "VALUE".  We love becuse we value something or somebody.  

Just because we value something or somebody, does not mean that we DESERVE to gain what we value.  That hurts!  

Basically, love is WANTING.  When we want something and we get it, that's great.  Does it hurt?  No! That's wonderful.  If I can earn what I want and pay for it it, I deserve it and get it.  What's the problem?  But if I want something that I can't pay for, or can't trade anything for it, that hurts.

Love, even romantic love, follows the same rule.  The person you love is the person you VALUE.  But no relationship can be balanced if there is NO TRADE and this is true for merchandise as well as for romantic love.  You can't force one to love you.  And deception doesn't go very far. You must deserve to be loved.  How?  It depends on your values.  If you value beauty as the main reason for having a romantic relationship, you'd better be worthy of it; if you value tenderness, empathy, nurturing, someone else who values those qualities will be attracted by you, if you have them.  If it's intellectual depth that someone wants...well, you got the idea.

Most people want a mixture of all these qualities and have trouble identifying exactly in what hierarchical order they will select.  All of us have a hierachy of values.  We are just not educated to know them consciously, so when we love, we do it subconsciously, we respond to SOME values and ignore others.  Then we find out, as a surprise, that we acted according to upsidedown values: we might have followed the least important and ignored the VERY IMPORTANT!  That hurts!

Answer 3

Love is the essence of life.  It propels us and makes us grow by challenging us to reveal ourselves to another and look into them without the barriers and social defenses we are accustomed to.  As such it can harm or heal.  Love itself isn't good or bad, how we react to it and what state we're in when it comes knocking determines the size of the wound.  

In the end though, even the most agonizing love is life.  It reveals your jealousy, anger, compassion, lust, and everything else.  With this knowledge you can grow into an instrument better equipped to give and receive love.

In short, love hurts when you haven't yet learned to love and it's hurt is intended to teach you to love.

Answer 4

i GUESS it's because you got deeply involved to someone, and it hurts. i also think you are too serious of things. its  just fine if u tke it easy. WE ARE INDIVIDUALLY CREATED, YES WE NEED A PARTNER BUT WE CAN STILL LIVE BY OURSELVES.

Answer 5

I believe love hurts so much because it is the ultimate thing / object that we all strive for in life.  It is the feeling behind it that makes it ever so sweet, and at the end of the day that is all that matters. We just want to love and be loved in our lives.  

It hurts because in some situations we have it, right there... in our hands, and it is the most wonderful feeling.  Then, in a blink of an eye... it is gone! And we have no power to change things or bring it back!  

Other times, we are so lonely.... and we feel like we have so much to share, and yet we have no one to love and no one that loves us in a romantic unconditional way.  

In some sense, it is great to experience this hurt, because it makes us appreciate and not take for granted the loves in our life. We learn to cherish them more, and treat them special.

Thanks for reading!

Answer 6

Love hurts only when it is spurned. Why? Because it is a rejection of one's very self. To love another is to give our heart to another, which makes us vulnerable if our love is not reciprocated.

Despite the hurt, for our own mental health, we must continue to love because love is part of what it means to be human. Freud once said something profoundly wise: “in the last resort we must begin to love in order not to fall ill, and we are bound to fall ill if . . . we are unable to love.”

Answer 7

Real love doesn't really hurt at all.