Why does my child hates me?

Question

my 4 year old son come up to me out of the blue and said mum your a *****, ive never used the b word in front of him does he really think that about me or does he not know what he means, i feel hurt by it i know he's only 4 but he said it like he knew what it meant :( what should i do about it?

Answer 1

Instead of focusing on whether or not you should be offended by the things a four year old said, you should focus on where in the world did your innocent four year old pick up the word b**ch.  THAT, in my opinion is the true problem at hand.  4 yr olds repeat stupid things, and they don't need to be hanging around people who use that language.

Answer 2

a great suggestion I just recieved for potty mouth is to divert attention from the negative words... because children don't know what they mean, evenif they say it like it. when my son calls me a name, I call him one right back! but not like you think.... for instantce:

baby: your an as*!

mommy:your a banana!

I turn it into a game, and divert the attention from the negative.

if it's really bad, though, the the c or b or f words, I tell him those are words that are hurtful, but I never say "bad," because then he wants to use them when he is feeling rebellious.

your son will love you no matter what, and as mothers we sometimes take a lot of verbal c**p... just remember it is our job to love them and set limits for them so they can grow up into great and wonderful people.

if you ever need an ear, feel free to email me!

Answer 3

no! he does not hate u!.

i worked with preskool over the summer, and this 4 year old girl once said "f** you" and i got so shocked. i asked her where she learned that and she said from her brother.

he probobly learned it somewhere. tell he to never say that word again.

if hes 4 im possitive he doesnt know wat it means, so just tell him its bad and he should never say that.

hope i helped.

Answer 4

too much t.v.he doesn't know what he's saying

Answer 5

No he does hate you. He's looking for a reaction. When he says the B word to you explain to him that it's not a nice word. That it hurts people feelings if he calls them that.

Answer 6

It probably just heard it somewhere.  But I would definitely sit him down, and ask him where he heard it, and let him know it is not a nice word, and that it is a grown up word.  

Answer 7

anyone can say yr a ***** . Most dont mean it, so if your child says it , either wouldnt say anything , if he says it again , ask him does he know what it means? If he says no , ask why is he saying it. Probably tell you where he learned it from.  

Answer 8

He's a child.   He didn't say it because he hates you. He said something he knows is probably a naughty word, to push your buttons and to see what you'll do.  Kids do that.  Don't be so sensitive.  If you feel it's improper for him to say such things, say "we don't use words like that."  

Answer 9

No of course he doesn't hate you...

He most likely  doesn't know what that means he

probably herd a friend or someone older them him say it

i was totally shocked when my 5 year old  said F-U to me..

of course shes didn't know what that meant at the time but..

i know this might sound a little bad but if he says it again put hot scauce in his mouth! just little bit!

Answer 10

I agree with the people above.  However, if he continues to use it even after you explained it the best you could, don't be afraid to punish him (time out or whatever) to drive your point further home.  Children tend to curse for the shock value of it, which gives them what they want to get through the cursing: your attention.  Make sure you let him know at these times that you won't let that kind of talk be used in your house.

Answer 11

I would have slapped his hand/butt when he first said it.  You gave birth to this child and he should treat you with more respect. Again...he is only four years old.  Maybe he picked it up from another person, but at any rate you need to sit down with your child and let him know that it's a  horrible thing to say to you or any one at that matter.  Don't take it personal I am pretty sure he isn't sure the meaning.

GOOD LUCK and Happy parenting!!  

Answer 12

He does not mean it.  Ask him who taught him that though and you'll need to have a word with that person!

Answer 13

i'm almost positive he doesn't know what it means but he had to hear that word be used because toddlers don't just come up with that stuff.  try to watch who he's around and explain to them that he is picking things up and to watch their language.  i'm sure he doesn't hate you, he probably heard that used in that text and just repeating what he heard.  

Answer 14

You should talk to him and ask him where did he hear that word from and does he know what that means. Explain to him that there are some words that are making other people upset. Tell him that even grown ups should not use those words and if he ever hears any new words he's nit sure about, he should always come to you and ask you first the meaning before he can use them.  

Answer 15

i doubt he knows what it means, i'd demand of him to know where he learned it.

Answer 16

Well if he is only 4 he doesnt know what it means so dont worry about it you should not feel hurt. He could have heard it from someone else my little sister fliped off but thats because she didnt know it was bad just tell him not to say those words.