Why does my dad not like me?

Question

Its like everything I want to do, he disaproves of. I'm getting sick of it. I can't do what I like without him being against it. He's always trying to make me live my life his way. Hes an arrogant control freak and dosn't realize it.

I'm too afraid to confront him because he has an extreme temper. He then starts saying he does all this work to provide for me(and the rest of the family) and that I'm just stupid.

I want to follow my dreams but he keeps making me feel that they are stupid or just plain unrealistic.

Hes told me that snails work faster then me and that I'm really naive. It really hurt me that my own father sees me this way.

Hes confused me alot. I don't know whats right or wrong anymore. I try to make him proud by taking his advice but I still have this feeling I'm heading in the wrong direction deep down. If I don't take his advice he gets really offended and makes me feel like foolish horrible person. He f**kin manipulates me!

Whenever I plan to do something he dosn't expect. He acts fine about it, but soon after he begins to discourage me from it. He dosn't even have faith in me. Its really upsetting.

Why is my dad like this to me?

Answer 1

You didnt mention how old you were, but have you tried to express your feelings through a letter to him. You say he is quick witted and good with words, so this might be a way for you to truly express how he is making you feel without him interrupting you. It must be tough to feel like this about your Dad.

Good Luck To You.

Answer 2

Your dad doesn't see your world through your eyes and doesn't understand you well. Tell him that you want to chase after your own dream, not his and he can't really stop you.

Answer 3

It doesn't make any difference he's ur dad or not.

If a person is unhappy, she will treat you exactly the same as your dad. The unhappier she is, the nastier her behaviour will be.

Imagine something:

What if a person has a method that brings unhappiness and that person doesn't want to admit she is wrong?

How she will behave?

Well she is unhappy, but her method is perfectly ok from her stand.

Then what?

Well, of course the blame is somewhere outside of her.

Then she will try to put the blame on other persons for her unhappiness.

Everyone does it, you just have to observe to see it.

But what is happiness? How can you be happy? How can ur dad be happy?

My experience tells me that happiness is the state when you express your true self in the outside world. Then you participate in creation harmoniously. This is happiness.

Happiness is not given by someone or by something. This is the stupidest method applied by humans for thousands of years.

Trying to extract happiness from something: money, women, possesions etc.

Ur dad has to follow the bad method, otherwise he would be interested in being more spontaneous, more his true self. And if he was interested in being more his true self, he would love a little help from young people, from you. Because young people are more sincere and spotaneous and prejudice-free.

Your father's behaviour is not special, nor the worst.

Everyone is treated like you are being treated, much or less.

You have to analyze urself what you see. Don't listen blindly to people. Listen then think for urself.

Listen to your heart more. Your heart easily identifies sincere persons. You really know when someone is sincere or has evil intentions.

Every person has a heart.

A little voice inside always telling you the truth.

But it took me 10 years to figure it out. Ultimately, I've returned to this voice and listen to it. Everything got better since then.

Forgive your dad, and walk your way.

Stick to your decisions, good or bad, because only in this way you can learn what you are, right?

If you looove something, it reflects you.

If you like something, it reflects some part of you, but not everything.

If you feel something is wrong, then it is not part of you.

In this way you begin to understand yourself.

The more you find out what you are, the easier you can see what happens when you express yourself exactly as you are.

And it's a sweet feeling. The sweetest. Your hunger will be fed. Then you will want more and more:P

To conclude:

1. Manifest yourself as you truly are, in spite of others, no matter who they are (if they love you, they would love to see you happy, right?)

2. Forgive ur father for being unhappy. This is his choice. You cannot do a thing about it.

Hope this helps:P

Answer 4

Your father's father was probably hard on him too and this is a learned behavior. When a person is young they have dream and aspirations of many things and may chase after them in many directions. However most of them ever work out. So finally life crashes down with reality and you find your self doing a job you don't like, so you can pay the bills and support your family, thinking that you will go back and finish college but you never do. He doesn't want to see you wasting time spinning your wheels on some harebrained idea, its hard and frustrating for him to watch you make mistakes in life. But we all need to make them to learn.