Why does my husband ignore me?

Question

Its like every single thing, it literally takes 10 times sometimes for us (me and our children) to speak to him, even just his name, before he even answers, all he does is talks on his phone, watches TV, goes on the computer, goes to work, goes to his friends house.

He tells us that he loves us, dont get me wrong, so I do feel like he really does, but he just ignores us so much, its really starting to get us down.

Anyone have any advice?

He does do cooking a couple of times a week, just like I do, I do try doing his food too, (African food)and am OK at it, so you know, we do live to each others cultures etc. And do get on, just am getting so annoyed with him ignoring us.

Answer 1

Try getting involved with some activities that he is interested in also. It sounds like you have lost common ground to cross together as a family unit

Answer 2

send him a tender Letter

that you love to hear him because you miss him even when you are there

and when he talks about anythign even about football give him full attention and let yoru kids remain silent

sometimes if i feel that no one listens to me i let peopel talk and remain shutting my mouth all the time

Answer 3

first he loves you and the kids i,m sure

my husband as all ways been this way and yes he does me the same way  acts like his all ways mad or in another world or his nose in the tv  and i all so some times have to raise my voice it can be many things  this is the way he is or has a lot on his mind

try picking out one ot two days a week for family night

talk to him a bout that and see what he says

hope this helped a little bit

Answer 4

U don't say how long married?  Girl this could be a danger sign!  Do not ignore it, it's time to ck the computer, cell ph, land line calls and see who he's spending time with.   It could be nothing and then it could be he's leading a double life.

Communication is key and he isn't going to talk with you immediately if all of you overwhelm him.  But this is a warning sign of a man going astray whether it's another women, outing, new friends something is occupying his time and thoughts.  You can't be accusing, striking up conversation or dinner dates need to go into action immediately.

Don't lose your intimacy with each other.  Take a shower together and just lay in each other arms and do small talk.  Make yourself desirable and shower/fresh when you go to bed.  

Answer 5

try to find something that you and your kids can do to keep you busy. start getting out of the house.he sees you guys as a permanant fixture in the house,shake things up. find ways of doing other things and giving him time to miss you guys.

Answer 6

honey just talk to him about it.

im sure he will understand. dont start an argument though, thats the last thing you want happening. maybe plan to go somewhere on the weekend as a family. and let him get closer to you and the kids. im sure he's just tired from work at the end of the day? maybe? i dont know your husband. but the best thing to do is.. talk to him :)

Answer 7

sounds very familiar..think he's stressed out about something.....men do have a habit of clamming up when stressed...he's zoning out when he gets into the comfort of his own home with people he feels safest with because everywhere else he's getting his head melted...doesn't want to talk about it til he's fixed it but in the mean time is causing more problems for you and him.........try to find out whats worrying him........get him to realise that your home can still be ok no matter what so long as you're all working together.............  

Answer 8

I'm going through the same thing and feel like I'm invisible sometimes,maybe we're to different,because we come from very different backgrounds,continents and culture.I wish I could tell u why but I really don't know.

yankeeboy -may be right

Answer 9

If your kids are old enough to write, then you and them all sit down and write him a letter.  Tell him how lost you all are without him in your lives.  Let your letter sound as if he's DEAD, because  he is!  He's not there for the needs of his family.  He's not caring for any of you, if he's NOT listening.

IF the letters don't work, then I'd suggest a long family talk.  Make him turn off his phone, computer and TV and listen to all of your fears of him not being there.

IF this then doesn't work, suggest he move out  until he can be a father and husband with his whole heart, not just words.