Why does this make me almost cry?

Question

Okay I'm a 17 year old guy, half black half asian. I moved from an extremely small and remote town to a big city 2 years ago and I have no social skills when it comes to meeting new people. It takes a lot of time for me to get comfortable talking to girls. I'm tall, in shape, and all that stuff but I still have problems with it... Lately a few girls from my high school graduating class have been talking to me a lot and hanging out, and it makes me think about why I've never had a serious relationship before. Everytime I get close to it, I s***w it up. Today, I was talking to a girl that is beautiful, smart, talented, and just amazing. Today though, we were talking for hours on the phone, then I just thought to myself "she's great... but like always, she's just not the one for me" and within seconds I began fighting tears. The last time I cried was when I was 12. I haven't cried since then, not even at funerals of close people. Today was weird though... It just gave me a real sense of hopelessness when it comes to relationships. I have no confidence anymore that I will find the right girl. I know i'm 17 and i'm young, but I just get really lonely and it would be nice to have someone with me... Since I moved, I don't have many friends. Also, my previous town had no black people or asians, so I mainly just had white friends. When I moved here, all the blacks and asians kind of just exiled me because I don't talk with an accent or anything and my family is very well off. Sorry I'm getting off topic.

But yeah, I'm not one who shows emotions like this in public. I tend to hold it in, because even though releasing emotions is a good thing, it isn't a good thing to do in front of people you aren't close to, it's just a sign of weakness. Also, my parents left me with the house to myself for 3 weeks, and it's been one week. I am extremely lonely and depressed and I haven't gotten out of the house once...

Please, please help me. I'm not suicidal right now, although every now and then I consider it. I just need someone to give me a little hope that I will find the right girl for me... Please.

Answer 1

You should join a social club where you can openly talk about your feelings without worry. You should get to know one girl who you think is the perfect type of girl, and don't get on her just to be dating, but become friends first, we girls love guys as friends, my BFF is a guy and i trust him with EVERYTHING! When she feels like she can trust you and taklk to you about anything, then start taking her out to the movies and to dinner and stuff and progress slowly. Make sure she is the open type of girl, the one you can cry on her shoulder to and will still be there for you. Whenever you feel like crying, just go for it even if your on the phone, girls tend to be more sensitive, in stead of saying something mean like what up with you, we say nicer stuff like whats wrong, what bugging you. I know i'm like that anyway. Also, the reson you dont feel like God is helping you is because you dont believe, once you believe he will help you.  

Answer 2

Honey, don't be hopeless. I became an aunt when I was 15, and fell in love with children.  I started wanting a baby when I was 18. I got engaged at 18, with no plans for a wedding.  By the time that I was 23, I had been to 7 family weddings of girls younger than me.  I had gone to 9 baby showers etc...  I was so heart broken.  He finally told me that he didn't want to talk about it again until we were 25.  It got to the point that I couldn't even see a baby without crying (in public).  One day at work, a guy from another area was filling in.  Between jobs, we talked.  Then a few months later, my room mate asked if I wanted to go see a movie.  This guy was with her, and sat between us.  My room mate told me that I should leave my ex.  She finally convinced me, and I married the guy from work 2 years later.  I have a beautiful baby boy who just turned 2 in June.  I know that you feel anxious, and that everyone else is living while you are just existing.  I want you to know that I was 26 when I got married, and 31 when I had my baby boy.  I could have had a baby with my ex, but I wanted a different life than most people.  Sometimes, it takes a little extra time for some of us to find our dream.  It just means that you will know it when it happens, and you will cherish it like no other.  I promise.  

Answer 3

y do u think that all the girls u talk to arent the ones for u? y do u push them away? u feel like crying because u r alienating urself from relationships. maybe instead of waiting for 'the one' to come to u, the next time a girl shows interest u just go for it, she might turn out to be the best thing in ur life. as for the emotions, dont be scared to cry, if ur uncomfortable doiong it in public then do it in ur room, just let it all out there is nothing wrong with that, it isnt a sign of weakness, its just normal human behaviour

Answer 4

I feel for you you are so young and at your age should not be left alone for three weeks. Is there a place for you like the boys and girls club where kids your age gather?  I would try to get into some kind of a sport where you will meet others. Do you work? Even if you do not need the money that is a place to start to meet people. Or volunteer some place.  Even if it is a senior center you might meet someone that can teach you a new skill.  And there just might be that special someone that volunteers too.  Find a church youth group

Good luck