Why don't parents RSVP to birthday parties?

Question

For my daughter's birthday party, she invited the whole Kindergarten class. Today was the deadline to RSVP. Out of 23 kids, 10 called or e-mailed me to say they were coming. What about the other 13? Is this common? If I don't hear from the other 13, would you assume they're not coming? Would parents actually send their kids to a party when they didn't RSVP?

Answer 1

Some always call late

They just forget, then see the invitations and call

Some never do

Some never RSVP and show up

Some RSVP, and do not show up

I do not get it

I once in a while am late.  Most of the time, I get the RSVP date wrong in my head

If I RSVP Yes, and my child get sick, or she can not make it, I call in the Morning to let the parents know

I do not get this

I do think, you will get a few more in the next few days

Answer 2

I am in the same boat you are in.  I am having a party for my Pre-k daughter this Saturday and I only got 3 to RSVP out of 20.  I have had better luck with getting a response to my emails.  I am going to send an email out requesting a response regarding the party.  It is so much easier to reply to an email, hopefully that will work for both of us!  Good luck!

Answer 3

if u have extra goody bags the kids thats showed up wouldnt mind 1 or 2 extra goody bags........they will be happy.....its better to have extras then  be short

Answer 4

Yes, most of them will come. And half of the ones who RSVP'ed to you will forget about the party. This is what happened to my daughter.  I had no idea who was coming and then a bunch of people showed up late. RUDE!!!

Answer 5

This is totally common. I would have extra goody bags just in case, and if there are extra give them to the kids with siblings. You could also call to check on if they are coming and bringing siblings just to get a head count. I have a problem going to parties sometimes because my husband travels and I have 2 girls 2 years apart. It is hard to take one without the other or find and have to pay for a sitter to attend a party of a classmate. Some invitations say "siblings welcome" (I love that and do that will all my parties.). You may get a better response if they know they can bring the sibs along and not have to find a sitter and a gift. Just an idea.

Answer 6

I know it happens as you read about it on here. But in Australia i don't find it that big of a problem. There may be one or two and I always just ask them as they have usually forgot or have yet to get the invite from the bottom of the bag(lol) It is hard. You can't really say to them when they turn up "sorry , you didn't rsvp so you can't come in" looks like you will have to ring them

Answer 7

This is a pretty common situation in many different circles. There's no question that it is rude to not RSVP on time but, lots of people are busy or lazy or procrastinating or forgetful or undisciplined. You are certainly right to be annoyed. What to do about being annoyed is not something I'm good at. But, if you want to know who is likely to come to the party, you probably should wait a couple more days and hope some more people respond and if not, then you probably need to call the people who haven't. Chances are most of the people who haven't responded are going to say no -- but, you may end up with a surprise guest or two if you don't check in with them. I totally agree that it should not be your responsibility to have to do this but, hey -- welcome to the real world!

Answer 8

I suspect some will RSVP late.  People get busy and forget.  Don't assume they are not coming though...call them a few days before the party and find out so you are not short on food etc.

Oh..one other thing...never give out invitations at school if that's what you did.  MANY kids just never take them out of their backpacks or they lose them before they even blink.  always mail invitations

Answer 9

I'd say they are just disorganized (like me).  They will probably call you a few days before the party with an apology and asking if it's to late to RSVP with a yes.

I would call everyone who did not RSVP, because I would want an accurate head count.

Answer 10

It's rude and poor etiquette.  I always put RSVP on invites and a little less then half do not RSVP and show up anyways.  Or a lot of people RSVP on the deadline at 10 at night.  It bugs me when people dont rsvp then go anyway.  There is a specific reason for RSVP.  For my sisters college graduation party, she was having a cocktail party and her invites said NO CHILDREN since there was alcohol and she did not want chilren to get into on accident, but people brought children anyway....  People have no consideration sometimes.

Answer 11

No etiquette!

Answer 12

I recently had a party for my 7 year old, but we only let him invite 8 kids from school.  I sent out the invitations 2 weeks prior.  Out of 8, 3 responded, 4 showed up.

Out of the 4 that did come, 1 had lost his invitation, 1 did not take his home until the day of the party and one of them had colored on his with a black marker and his mom could not read it!  They are actually the ones that got in touch with me, not sure what happened to the others!  It is possible the invitations did not make it home or got misplaced

Have fun!

Answer 13

it is common and frustrating. Usually those who call are the ones coming... a few will call and say they are not. but generally the ones who dont' call, don't come. generally speaking.