Why don't some of our post teenage kids respect our judgement?

Question

Why don't some of our post teenage kids respect our judgement?

Answer 1

EVERYONE thinks that their generation has so much more to offer than the one that is coming after them. Our parents' parents thought they had all the answers, our parents think THEY have all the answers and now, we as parents of kids in the tween and post teen years think we have all the answers. These are bogus reasons for pushing advise on someone who hasn't asked for it. Our grandparents didn't like it when they were told what to do, our parents didn't like it when they were told what to do, and we didn't like it when we were told what to do.

No one has all the answers or best suggestions, but what matters is the delivery of the suggestion.

Personally, I hate it when someone says: 'Well, if you ask me, .........' I didn't ask you.

or 'If I were you I'd......' You aren't me.

or the classic: 'When I was your age I would never......' Yeah, but you aren't my age now, are you?

(fill in the blank with what's going on in your life and house!)

You can guide a person with the way you carry yourself  without saying a word.

NEVER give advise when you haven't been asked for it. If someone wants to know your opinion, give just that, nothing more.(see list of don'ts above)

I know my parents have it bad about pushing what they would do "if they were me" and don't have the whole story about what is going on exept what they want to hear.

Selective hearing comes to mind in this area.

I see it all the time with teens who want to be adults and make mistakes that could have been avoided if they had only asked for help.

With this being said, a bought and paid for lesson is more beneficial to the purchaser than a gift of advice any day.

Answer 2

Oncethey are past teenage years, they are legal adults; they don't have to listen to you. They want to make their own desicions and as a parent you must learn to respect that. Parents are merely guides; not forceful instructors.

Answer 3

The best way to teach is to guide, not preach.  (lol look at me rhyming like a dumbass!)

Answer 4

One of the main things that I would think is that you're not allowing them to grow up and to experince their lives as they want to.  Once you're child is an adult and really before that, you have to step back and let them learn on their own.  IF you don't they will never learn how to make their own decisions.  You have to allow them to be adults and let them live their own lives, even if you don't agree with what they are doing.  Part of being an adult is not having to listen to any one else about how you live your life as long as you aren't hurting anyone.

Answer 5

Do you mean like people in their 20's? I do not see why you expect them to defer to your judgment since they are just as much adults as you are. People should always respect their elders though.

Answer 6

Generation that thinks they know it all.

Answer 7

youre gonna have to be a little more specific than that. I understand that most teenagers are crappy....but there are some that listen, and are smart and wise! Try communicating in another way, change your style..

Answer 8

you're a bad parent.

Answer 9

They know better than that.

Answer 10

Because they think they know or just simply dont care

Answer 11

cuz u dumb

Answer 12

What do you mean? You want them to listen to your judgment? Well, they probably want to make decisions on their own. Or it could mean that your kids are worried about your ability to make judgments depending on how old you are.