Why don't they like my loving boyfriend?

Question

It seems like my Dad and my brother don't mind him. Well my brother is now married and has a baby and lives about 10 to 15 minutes from my boyfriend's and my apartment and I never get to see them. My brother and I always set up dates where we will plan to hang out and stuff all 4 of us together and it never goes through. I know my brother more than anyone in the world and before he was married to this woman he had never backed out on family plans. There are even times when he has missed going to see our Dad (we have different moms) and I think it's mostly because of his wife. She doesn't seem to like any of our family. She NEVER calls me or treats me like a sister-in-law. I always thought when my brother got married that because he and I were so close, I'd be close with his wife too. I used to do everything with his past girlfriends. She just doesn't like me or something, and I've heard comments that she's made about my boyfriend. My mother doesn't like my boyfriend because I live with him, and it hurts her feelings that I moved away from home, but I'm in college and have a job so I would have had to live up here at School all summer anyways so even if I didn't have a boyfriend she would be upset. In general though she's okay with him, but sometimes she has flat out just told me she doesn't really like him. I don't understand why my sister-in-law and my mother do no like him. He has never done or said anything to bad to them. My little sister adores him and she loves spending time with him and I at our apartment and when she's there, he makes sure that she gets to go somewhere fun. We took her to the movies and to golf and ride go-karts. He has takes us to hockey games and football games. We are taking her to a concert for her birthday. So the problem is my sister-in law and my mother. My sister-in-law doesn't even really know him. She's seen him like 3 or 4 times. This boyfriend of mine, treats me like a princess. He does anything and everything for me. He loves me and tells me I'm beautiful everyday of my life. He takes me places and buys me things and I do the same for him. We are best friends. I don't understand why they don't get that. What is it that they don't like about him? I don't know. I mean they were my age once, and they know what it's like to be in love. Why aren't they understanding? It makes my boyfriend upset when he's in their presence and they make him feel like a bad person or not good enough to be apart of our family or something.. I don't really care because I'm going to marry him. I'm in the middle of college and he's at the tail end of grad School. We are getting married in a few years. I don't understand. WHY DONT THEY LIKE HIM?

Answer 1

My little sister use to have a boyfriend that soon after she married. My mother did not like him for nothing and always talked bad about him but she really didn't know him. The reason she didn't know him was because my sister hides to much of her life and when she brought this guy to her home (which my sister lived with my mom) she introduced him as her boyfriend and he was very nice but my mom did not like how he made himself home to quick. He slept with my sister in the living room and he walked around the house like he was very comfortable. Now he can feel like this but when it comes of first meeting parents you should show respect to the point where you know its not time for you to act like this. So this gave my mother an opportunity to talk bad about him. Two months later they married. Immediate family members where not invited into there wedding not even me and I'm close to her, I showed up anyways. Then they divorced a year later because the way his direspecting ways and childish acts. Pretty much they seen something in him that you don't. That doesn't mean don't be happy. It just means they are being older parents to you. Bring him over to their house more often. Or go out to a restaurant together with the family so they can get to know him. It wouldn't hurt. If he is not a nice guy you will soon find out. But If he does turn out nice you will be okay to know you made a good decision without them and they will also see. Also, try having an open conversation with your mom and find out why she feels this way. good luck.