Why hasn't my mom accepted my pregnancy yet?

Question

I am 18 wks pregnant with my first child and she still hasn't accepted the fact i am pregnant or that i am having a child. I am 17 i am going to be 18 in a couple of months. I graduated high school a year early and i am going to school full time and working. My mom has told me once you take care of the pregnancy then you can be involved with your family again. My fiance and i have decided we are keeping the baby and we plan on getting married as soon as i turn 18. My sibling just know i moved out and don't even know i am pregnant. My grandparents on the other hand know and are very supporting of me and the baby. People are saying my is hurt and is still lashing out at me how long will it take her to accept the fact she is going to be a grandma early next year. I am living with my fiance and his mom. He leaves for boot camp on tuesday which is going to be hard but this is what he wants to do and i am behind 100%. I know i am going to be a military wife and i am ok with that. I am letting him follow his dream of joining the marines. I love him and support him. People are telling me i am being selfish by carring this baby to term which i don't think. Today is a big gettogether at my grandparents and me and my fiance are going and i am oviously pregnant what do i tell my other family members cause my mom doesn't want me to say that i am pregnant actually she wants me to hide it. I am excited and i am going to be a mom wan't perfect timing but i am doing the best with the timing. What do i do.

Answer 1

just come right out and say it I'm pregnant they should support you and your fiance your mother will fall in love with the baby when she sees her for the first time trust me

Answer 2

you should not have a baby and go to work. plus, you are only 17. YOU ARE SO YOUNG!

Answer 3

u sound very proud of ur little girl and ithink u should tell maybe wen ur mum sees that everyone else accepts ur pregnant she mite get her act together n support u like she should if not shes just being selfish take care of u n ur baby girl u know exactly what u want u should go for it congrats and best of luck with ur wedding xx

Answer 4

whats done is done. yes you are young, but the reality is, is that you are pregnant. i think your mom wans the best for you but at the same time i think she is ashamed and feels old.for her to tell you that you cant talk to her until you take care of it (abortion) is selfish. for that reason i would not want her in my life at all. when you go to your get together, and people start talking,  let them know. and forget about your moms selfishness. dont take anyones c**p to heart. people are going to talk. and since you made the decision to keep this baby, then you need to make the decision to be an adult about the whole situation.  so be mature about all the c**p your going to get, and be proud of that little girl.  its all smiles today. dont let ANYONE get you down. and your mother will eventually come around. and if she doesnt, then its her loss. take care. good luck. and s***w what other people think. you are not the first 17 year old girl to get pregnant. you cant change the past, so dont dwell on it and dont let people step on you.  :)

Answer 5

You are just gonna half to be happy for yourself and the baby, I really cant say why your mother wont accept the fact you are pregnant maybe its because she thinks you are too young and wanted you to do more with your life then being tied down with a baby right now, You should just talk with her and ask her why she is doing this too you. I know how it feels my mother did the same thing to me and while I had support from my husband and my sister I was ok with it but the most part I wanted my mom to support me that's the one truly person I needed. If you talk with her and she still can't accept the fact then I wouldn't worrie about trying to get her to accept it, when shes ready she will come around just give her time. Hope the Best for You!

Answer 6

honestly, who cares what your mom thinks.. you are happy, you are in a stable relationship and you dont live under her roof or rules any more.

Dont hide your pregnancy if you dont want to.

IF your mom keeps this up, its only going to be her loss in the end, no one elses.

Go to the gathering, show of your baby bump and s***w the ones who say you are selfish...

Answer 7

You Mother is unhappy because she knows you are too young to care for that baby financially and may have doubts about your ability to be a Mom at your age. She may also be thinking you are throwing away your young life to be settled into a Motherhood while the best years of your life sail past you. I have a Grand daughter who is Pregnant at 15 and now 16. She is due in 3 weeks. I love her and I will love her baby but I am not happy for her decision to have this baby when she is a child herself. She has all these big dreams and claims to have all the answers too.

Answer 8

She is in denial because she is disappointed that you are having a baby and you aren't married. You will understand how she feels when your child is a teen.

Why don't you make the announcement that you are getting married before you tell the family that you're pregnant?

Answer 9

she will after u have the baby. trust me, my mom thought she was going to kick me out, but nooo she fell in love witht hte baby. it just sux living with her because she critisizes my parenting all the time. i was the exact same age though when i got pregnant.

Answer 10

if you are 18 weeks you are too far along to get an abortion anyways. so just explain to your mom that this is what you were dealt and you are dealing with it the best way you know how and accepting the baby into your life. Even if she doesn't want to be a part of your pregnancy I couldn't imagine that once her grand baby was here that she could deny the love she feels for that child. (if you can forgive her for turning her back on you) My mom got pregnant at 19 with my older sister and my grandfather did the same thing, telling her that she needed to have an abortion and that it wasn't acceptable..he didn't even come to the hospital to see her, but once he saw her for the first time...it was over. he could not deny that my mom made the right decision and was living with her choice. Good luck, hopefully everything will turn around for you.

Answer 11

That is very sad that your mom hasnt accepted it yet. My mom didnt want to accept mine either. Im also 17 and pregnanct i will be 18 in a week. Im 7 months now. It took her a very long time to accept it i mean she knew it was happening but she was so upset with me. Now we are great. I think once your mom sees that beautiful baby she will be ok. It sucks it will take that long but it might. You are not being selfish by caring your baby and dont let anyone tell you that. Enjoy your pregnancy and show it off like crazy because 9 months goes by so fast and your gonna miss it!

Good luck hun!!!  

Answer 12

Your mom should be proud to have raised such a responsible young lady.  Taking responsibility for a baby at your age is a tough thing and you need all the support you can get (especially from your family).  

You mom is clearly just having a difficult time digesting the fact that her child is having one of her own.  You and your fiancee have made the choice to keep the child and she needs to get over it.  If it were me personally, I would not make any effort to hide it from the family.  What are you supposed to do at family outings in the future once the baby has arrived ~ get a sitter and pretend she doesn't exist?  They may not notice you're pregnant now but they're likely to notice you carrying an infant around in several months!  Your mom needs to deal with this.  It's wonderful that your grandparents are so supportive and perhaps others in your family will follow suit.  Your mom will come around eventually.

Congratulations & Good Luck!

Answer 13

You can't and shouldn't hide the fact you are pregnant.  There will be more people there to help you then those who are acting like your mom.  If you already know that you are going to stay in school and you are working, then you are doing the best thing you can do for yourself and your family.  It will be hard for your fiance to be away in the military, but you obviously have people who are there to support you.  I would tell everyone when you are ready to tell them.  Your mother can't tell you what to do.  You are an adult and you can take care of yourself.  Tell her that she can either be there for you or not, but you are having a baby no matter what.  Don't let anyone convince you that you should abort the baby.  It is too late for that anyways.  You can do this, and you can do it with support or not.  You are doing the right thing, and congrats on your pregnancy.  God bless you!

Answer 14

She may not support you until she looks at her beautiful granddaughter. I am so sorry she's acting this way, but all you can do is just go on with the pregnancy. As for the rest of the family...just tell them. Maybe once your mom sees everyone else being happy for you maybe she'll shape up.  

Answer 15

I think that your mom just hasn't accepted that your growing up. I bet she fells like It was just yesterday that you were walking for your first time! If you haven't, try talking to her and see what's bugging her.

Answer 16

Honestly, you are just going to have to be proud of that baby and that you are doing what you feel is right. People are always going to have their opinions and you can't change that. You shouldn't hide it just so that you don't offend your mother.  

Answer 17

You don't seem selfish and actually sound pretty responsible. Your mom is probably still in shock, and there could be a number of reasons why she is against the pregnancy. Maybe she thinks you are limiting your life choices, she might still see you as a child, and maybe she thinks she's too young to be a grandma.

You have to give her time to come to terms with it, and I'm sure she will eventually have a change of heart when she meets her grandchild.

Answer 18

My daughter was the same age when she got pregnant and my wife also was the same way I believe it is harder on moms. But to see my wife as it got closer to my daughters due date was unreal I mean she really got involved she would buy all kinds of girly clothes for our future granddaughter and she and my daughter's future husband helped coached my daughter through child birth. My granddaughter is almost three yrs old now and my wife just adores her. So give your mom time she will come around.  

Answer 19

Your mother is having a difficult time accepting the situation because you have disappointed her.  Why don't you tell her that you know you have disappointed her and you expect to make the situation better by getting married.  Your significant other should join the Marines now if that's what he really intends to do.

Your mother will get over it.