Why is everyone always on everyone else's back?

Question

Do you ever feel as if the world is always commenting on your parenting constantly?

Example:

He drinks to much milk, put cereal in a bottle for him. (2 months old)

I was "starving" my son because I waiting till he was 6 months to give him solids.(4 months old)

You don't give him juice? (7 months old)

He needs shoes. But he wasn't even walking. (9 months old)

You need to cut his hair. (12 months and even still, even after I said no)

He still sits rear facing? (16 months old)

You are starting to potty train him way to early. (now at 16 months old)

Why can't I just do what I want? Do you get this for anything you do or don't do with your child? Why can't people just leave me alone?

Answer 1

You actually listen to those that notice small things like that? wow, I just pass it off like its annoying advice. in one ear out the other.

Answer 2

It definitely is frustrating, I mean your the mom right? I know how you must feel, and I definitely believe in the no juice rule! ( It gives them the squirts) your frustration is understandable! It is rude when someone questions your motherly ability and I understand completely why you want people to leave you alone. Next time someone says something like that you should just say go do that with your kids and leave me to mine.

Answer 3

AMEN!!!!! I hate it when people offer their unwanted opionions and advice. If they would mind their own go@!danm business I would be happier. Let everybody do what they want with their kids, its not their business what you do with yours!

Answer 4

i totally understand what you are talking about. Even my mother wonders why my son can't speak in a whole sentence or understands everything that we say to him (he's 30 months). Some people used to think I breastfed him for too long when he was 19 months.  

Answer 5

Relax, Tell them that every baby is different.  

Answer 6

You can do what you want. You are the parent of this child, not the other people. You are supposed to do what you think is best. Everyone has their own opinions on how children should be raised so their is no getting pass all the advice. Just let these people know that your child is healthy and it's up to you, not them, to make sure he is where he needs to be. I have the same problem. I usually thank them for the advice and tell them I will think about it. Or you could always tell them to mind their own business. Whichever floats your boat.

You can never give a baby to much milk, I didn't start solids on my daughter 'till 7 months, She is now 13 months and I still don't give her juice. I don't think I ever will. That's why we have fruit. She only wears shoes when she is in public walking. Still sits rear facing, Will never cut her hair, and well, I'm not to the potty training stage yet but will be doing it no later than 2 years of age.  

Answer 7

unfortunately, you can't control what other people say.  this stuff completely drives me crazy, but other than coming back at them with a smartaleck response, the only thing you can do is listen politely, explain that you have made a deliberate decision to parent the way you see best, and tell them you appreciate their concern.

Answer 8

When it comes to stuff like that I always say two things:  (1) You're never going to be able to satisfy 100% of people 100% of the time and (2) people are always going to have opinions on how to do things, some are just more vocal about letting theirs be known.  I know sometimes it's easier said that done but take it with a grain of salt...don't sweat the small stuff!

Answer 9

It's irritating, isn't it?

I just let it roll off my back!

My mother-in-law told me to start cereal at 2 weeks!  I didn't.

I was told that I was starving them so I started solids early.  I won't do that again.  Nothing bad happened but it wasn't necessary.

I don't give them juice either and they're 14 months old.  lol

Mine JUST got their first pair of real sneakers today because they're walking around outside and I need to protect their feet.  14 months old.

Nobody told me to cut their hair- but they're girls.

Mine are forward facing... but I don't blame you for rear facing.  I just have really really big girls.

I'm going to start potty training soon too, by the way.  :-D

Answer 10

Unwanted advice can be annoying but it is always gonna be there. People want to add their 2 cents to everything because they think their way is THE ONLY AND BEST WAY. Which is obviously not true. If you go out asking an opinion or advice then that is different and you just need to prepare yourself to accept the answers you get that you don't like without getting annoyed. Or don't ask for it in the future. Now if you are just strolling along and someone butts in and makes a comment then that is rude and a reason to get a little annoyed, but I think that HARDLY ever happens.

I am sure you at some point have given unwanted advice and someone found it annoying. Really only doing it to "help" or give advice or teach, people don't do it to annoy you or drive you crazy.

It sounds to me like if it annoys you so much for someone to say, you don't give him juice? Then you should become a recluse and never leave your house.

You may be defensive about your style of parenting and that is why it bothers you so much when someone makes a little comment. There is no reason to be. Everyone has their own way of doing things and you will enjoy life much more if you let little things like that just roll off your shoulders. Who cares what other people think about how you're parenting as long as you know you are doing a good job.

Answer 11

wow first off my baby is only a month but those ppla re wrong on almost everything! for one, a baby cant drink 'too much" milk, its the only thing they're supposed 2 have at 2 months until at least 4 months! (most drs recommend 6) secondly, my mom didnt feed me solids til I was EIGHT MONTHS! and I didnt die of "starvation" I was perfectly happy with just breast milk which was all I had til 8 months and the occasional formula

as for juice, its not necessary for a baby under 12 months to drink it.

as for cutting hair that's a manner of personal choice and taste and since he's only a baby and doesn't really have much interest in his appearance yet and you're the mother, thats YOUR Call not theirs.

i know how uf eel bc my bf's grandma has like mentioned giving my baby whos only a month water like a million times and each time I have 2 tell her "my breastmilk is ENOUGH for her at this early stage in her life" and she still doesnt get it, sheesh what is her obsession with water anyway I feel like telling ehr lol.