Why is foreign adoption so difficult, is there an easier way?

Question

My husband and I would love to adopt a baby girl, the problem is everytime I look into a specific country or agency we don't meet the criteria. Examples, you have to be married three years and not have more than four children living in the home. Even though are home is quite large and there is plenty of room. We have only been married a year but together we share six children. Our income is great and our home is nice so why is this so difficult. I don't understand the cookie cutter mold, I also learned that korean adoption you can't be older than 45 when the baby arrives and right now my husband is 44 (I am only 34). Is this hopeless or am I not looking in the right direction?

Answer 1

My adoptive parents had been married for 7 years, were 34 & 35, and had a 3-year-old biological son when they went looking for a baby girl.  Their home was quite large and their income was great.  They went to church and had nice cars too.  Sounds ideal, doesn't it?  Even today, they would pass a homestudy with flying colors.

But adoption is not supposed to be about these criteria alone.  It is also supposed to be about offering an emotionally healthy environment for a child who needs a home.  

What my aparents' adoption agency didn't bother to find out was that my amother was insane (it ran in her family), and my afather was an abusive misogynist.  Unfortunately, it doesn't appear that more than a few agencies in the entire country are doing psychological testing even today.

The criteria you say you fit really shouldn't be any problem at all except maybe you should be married for another year.  If it is a problem, you ought to look into adopting from the foster system.  There are well over 100,000 children in this country who need a permanent home.

Answer 2

You need to talk to some of these girls on here that are 14, 15, 16 and pregnant and scared and don't know what to do.

I know a girl who gave her baby away to a couple from her church, it was an open adoption.  I haven't seen her since the baby was born though.

Answer 3

The easier way is to make your own babies. If it's charity you're after donate to causes that help families stay together

..if you are looking for a bit of exotica...travel to another country to concieve. good luck, and have fun

Answer 4

Just keep looking. Most do have a minimum time that you've been married, but I know that in terms of the maximum age requirement, they are concerned with you age, not your husbands, so you're in good shape there.

Answer 5

Restrictions are imposed by the agencies to protect the child.  On average, the criteria are thought to help procure homes with more attentive and longer lived parents.

I wish we could say the agencies had the time and resources to scrutinize every person who wished to adopt.  Your unique situation would then be fully evaluated.  Sadly, they do not afford this time, leaving open problems for both the adoptee and potential adoptive parent.

Please disregard the advice of the first respondent.  Yahoo Answers is not the proper place to discuss the distribution of unborn children.  It is frankly unsavory.

Answer 6

You should have no problem adopting a child out of U.S. foster care. Is there a reason you are set on international adoption?

Answer 7

Please don't harass a young girl for her unborn like what Nan said