Why is it so hard for people to uphold their marriage vows?

Question

I am not married, but I am a little afraid of getting married. I see it all around me and it scares me that people just can't stay together...

Answer 1

Because there is temptation all around us.  There is always going to be someone more attractive than you or makes more money than you.  That is why you really need to make sure you are marrying the right man.

Answer 2

I don't believe its that hard to uphold their vows cause my parents have been married for 20 years and still going my husband and I have know each other for 6 years and been married for 2 so I wouldn't agree that its really that hard.

Answer 3

they sure can hold up their hard p***s or someone else's hard p***s, though, sad, isn't it?

=(...

Answer 4

Life is too short to dedicate your life to a loser.

Answer 5

People who know and believe in Love uphold their marriage vows.

People who cannot respect, care and understand one another and rate "having s*x" more important than "making love" have a hard time.

Answer 6

temptation is so hard to resist!

Answer 7

the concept of monogamy was created when people seldom lived past the age of 35

Answer 8

People change spouses like underwear. I don't blame you for being worried. I was with my spouse for 10 years before we got married because of that reason. I never wanted to be the girl that had 3 ex husbands and 5 kids all with different fathers

thank gosh in my case it worked out as I have been married 21 years and have 3 kids (all with the same father)

Answer 9

Its not hard to honor your marraige vows.  It's hard to keep all the distractions out of your relationship.  Work, preassure, in-laws, outlaws, overbearing friends on both parts.. at the end of each day if all you have is bad day at work and the a nagging or griping spouse about why they are late or their chores havn't been done, and do you realize how much I sacrifice for you.. yada yada yada... well then its just like changing the channel on TV.  NEXT!  If you got together for the good things great.. just keep the bad things out.

Answer 10

They aren't interested. They don't want to work to keep a marriage together when they can just get divorced. It's easy. And realistically, it's probably better that they get divorced because they shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. Those are the people who treat marriage like a dating type relationship. They figure they'll do it until they're done and then they'll get divorced. To them, it's just breaking up because they don't realize what marriage is supposed to be.

Answer 11

because a lot of people get married for the wedding and not for what it stands for.

Answer 12

I often see guys start to cheat on their wives as result of a diminished s*x life.  Most often s*x gets less and less once the honeymoon is over (the guy is still horny and the wife does not want it as much). Not to say this is right or a good reason to cheat, but it is the accelerant as to why it most often occurs.  

Answer 13

Because most people don't take them seriously.

Answer 14

because people are weak and it is easier to end the marriage than to work at it.

Answer 15

I have upheld my marriage vows for over 11 years to a man who thinks so little of me and really doesn't love me but only the convenience and comfortability I bring him. Marriage can be wonderful if with the right peron who has the same goals for their marriage. Marrying too young can and most likely will be disastrous, as in my case. I love him and do not regret marrying, but I do wish things would have turned out different. Whether I stay or go, my heart will never be like it was with him! Many, many scars!

It takes work, commitment and an unselfish heart. Don't be afraid just don't take it lightly!

Answer 16

People marry to young without ever knowing the definition of commitment. Then the first thing that the partner does to upset the other seems to be a reason to call it quits. How well you work through problems dating is a good precursor to how well you'll do in a marriage. It is never just one partners fault, it always takes two.

Answer 17

If 2 people really love each other, they will uphold their vows.  My husband and I have been together 6 yrs...neither of us would ever think of cheating.  We are best friends (I think that is the secret)...and do everything together.  

You can find someone faithful and honest!

Answer 18

Over 40-50 years, there will be some slipups!

Answer 19

The BIGGEST MISTAKE people make is jumping right into bed and having s*x FIRST,and THEN getting to know one another.Whether it is between singles, or jumping on the marriage wagon after a few weeks or a few months.

Most people also enter marriage or ANY relationship wanting complete and total control with the idea in the back of their heads of"if they don't do this or they do that I will tell them about it and if that doensn't do any good I will kick them to the curb."Married or not.

Selfishness is the thing that causes the most divorce, both people trying to force the other to change or accept them as they are.

When 2 people are not hoping for the other to change, or wanting them to change and thya have dated a yr or 2 no s*x and REALLY know one another and have not IGNORED the warning signs and red flags, and they accept one another as is,and are happy with one another as is, and are best of freinds as well, then chances are their marriage will last.

Most people do not do this though.

Answer 20

changed in there beliefs my wife said we were to young to get married after i found out there was infidelity on her part she said she was only with 2 other guys before we got married and that made it ok for her.

Answer 21

Theres so much temptation all around these days, I think that's why it's so hard, and people marry for the wrong reasons. I highly believe before getting married that a couple should date at least 1-2 years and live together as well. I wouoldn't worry too much if you have never had trust issues and you love each other. Don't let the stats get you down, believe it or not there are still happily married people out there! Just live life and have fun.  

Answer 22

Yes to uphold a marriage is not only one person job, but is both and is very difficult. Find the right partner is even difficult. People will change everyday. Today at this moment he is a good husband but doesn't mean that after a few years, he is still faithful to you. A good wife can be with the husband during bad times. A good husband can be with the wife during good times. That means from poor to rich, the husband still love and be faithful to the wife, then he is a good husband. But if the wife can only be with the husband when he is rich & healthy and leave him when he is poor. Then this is not the right women. I find that is always timing. If you found him at the right time that means may be he had been taught by his ex-girl friend how to be a good boyfriend. Learn his lesson already, when he be with you that time, he will not do the same mistake. Then you are lucky.  

Answer 23

Funny you should ask that. In my situation a lot happened in a short time of meeting and marrying my wife. So many stressing life issues came up within a 6 month period of time that it was overwhelming. Our marriage never fully recovered and led to my wife resenting me for not being the man that she wanted me to be and me being hurt by my wife (feelings of abandonment and unloved. Marriage takes a lot of work and can be worth it. I'm not sorry I married my wife, I'm just sorry it didn't work out as we planned and I'll spend the rest of my days wondering what we could have done better after counseling didn't work.

Answer 24

I know how you feel, but you have to know that if you are willing to put the work in you can make a marriage work

Answer 25

Because people would rather walk away then work it out.  Marriage is hard and it always has rough patches.  I think a good marriage is not so much about love as it is about commitment.  If you are fully commited to one another, you can work through anything.  If one person is not willing to work through the tough parts, the marriage fails.  I think divorce is on the rise because it is so much easier to walk away than it was 40 years ago.  I also think it has everything to do with the American mentality of "I want it all and I want it now and no one can stop me".