Why is it some people who are not part of the triad constantly answer on behalf of the triad?

Question

seems odd to me. Kind of like having a guy tell me what a period is like!

Answer 1

We are lucky to live in a society that embraces free speech. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, even if it seems to the rest of us to be erroneous. What I don't like is when someone "poses" as a member of the triad when they really are not. Everyone knows someone who seems to know everything about everything... even when they don't know squat!!!

Answer 2

I tend to take seriously only those with experience. Someone who reads the same books we all have without experience is pretty much overlooked by me.

I'm not here to be "in" or be "popular". I'm here do discuss my experience and perhaps learn from others experiences.

Answer 3

hmmm.  imo, there is no triad, because that would mean equal sides.

first mothers are not considered equal in the long run.

Answer 4

Simple.  That person either fears NOT being "in", or needs the ego boost of pretending to be "in".

Answer 5

Carnie,

This is really hurtful behavior.  To direct this question at Gaia Raain again.  She is a prospective adoptive parent and has every right to answer questions here.  Why do you care what another person says here so much to warrant a personal attack on them?  Now that IS odd.

Answer 6

I am not part of the triad, I have never claimed to know how any of them feel. BUT!, I am a mother, I am a daughter, and the thought of living my life without my son or my mother is NOT ok with me. The thought of anyone being ripped from their heritage so the adoption industry can make money and AP's can have a child at the expense of a family is NOT ok with me. So while I may not know how they feel first hand, I can only imagine the pain and confusion that is inflicted needlessly on the child and his natural parents, and I want to stop that however I can

Answer 7

Once upon a time, I was the perfect parent....and then I had kids.

I must admit, when people who have no connection with adoption express their opinons on how things should be done, I do read them respectfully.  Sometimes they make a lot of sense...and obviously there are times when they are shooting in the dark...and I do like your analogy. lol.

I sense that people asking questions take the opinons of those with genuine experience a lot more seriously than those who do not have direct experience....but occasionally - albeit rarely - someone who is able to take a step back from the situation can see things from all sides and maybe offer a less biased opinion and whilst there is a possiblity of this happening I am perfectly happy to consider their opinon.

Take care

Answer 8

I think that maybe you assume that people have no contact with adoptees, adoptive parents or natural parents.  I think it's reasonable for anybody to answer from their perspective, so long as they are clear of where they sit.  Many adoption reform advocates are siblings or spouses of triad members.  Are their opinions of no value too?   If you post a question on here, EVERYBODY is welcome to post their answer.

Answer 9

Tell us again how you had a closed adoption and it hasn't affected you negatively.  I disagree.

Answer 10

I was JUST thinking the same thing today. I saw where someone was asking why people adopted and there were tons of answers from people who have NOT adopted, so really how can they even say.

There was another one questioning the differenances and likeness of adoption and pregnancy. There were again tons of people who have not done BOTH and some who have done NEITHER trying to prove their thoughs to be right.

Then of course you have the people want to tell women to not look back, becuase the child has a better life. I find that particularly odd because there s no way to know where the baby is coming from or going to over the internet.

Yep lots of people speaking on BEHALF of rather than just speaking of, other people.

Answer 11

Hmmm...not sure, but it's interesting that someone who has nothing to do with the triad themselves is asking this question.

Googly, what does religion have to do with anything?  And how do you get "stalker".  I'm really curious where that comes from.  I haven't seen any "stalker-ish" behavior from Gaia.  Seems you may be having some mental issues and need someone in a white jacket to pay you a quickie little visit.

Answer 12

Because they are looking at things from an outsider's point of view.  I usually pay attention to an outsider's point of view, very often they are informative, they throw common sense into the mix, and they can make you see things you wouldn't normally be able to see.  This is not always the case, though, so you have to be discerning.

Answer 13

they cant help it they know it all

Answer 14

Now this really IS a "stupid question"!

Because last I checked, we lived in America and people are free to answer whenever they want to.  It's a little thing called freedom of speech.

God bless America.

Answer 15

Because everybody has an opinion, even when it's none of their business.

And those who have no experience tend to give the most ignorant and harmful answers.

Kind of sucks, doesn't it?

Answer 16

I would love to know exactly who you are referring to.