Why is it that i can always help anyone with most of there problems wether its being a good listener?

Question

or anything else in my power; yet i can never help myself with my own issues?

Answer 1

Simple, you can be detached when dealing with others and look at their issues objectively, you cannot do so with yourself.  It is impossible to be objective and honest with ourselves.  We each have 3 selves, the person we project to others, the person we wish to be, and our true self.  We might be able to discern the fronts that others put on, but we cannot unmask ourselves.  

In essence, looking at your own problems is like looking into a shattered mirror and not realizing it is broken.  You can see all the pieces, and they look connected, but while whole it is disjointed.  Furthermore, we can often "listen" to others and hear what they want or need without them ever being able to come to our conclusuons.  We cannot talk to ourselves, as we already know what we are feeling and thinking, and we often bolster out image or tear it down to our own contentment.  

Simply put, you are into your own problems too deeply to be of use to yourself.

Answer 2

It's one thing to be willing to listen and empathize with others and an entirely different matter to understand yourself.

The first thing you might want to work on is to take responsibility for your own life, words and deeds. Next, be completely honest with yourself, the good and the bad. Understand when you have been at fault as well as applauding yourself for the good you have done.

One thing that has always helped me when dealing with a tough issue: Write the Pro's and Con's on a piece of paper. Then study each of your answers, again being completely honest with yourself and taking responsibility for your part in the situation, what ever it is.

Work on loving yourself above all else. By loving yourself, I mean being comfortable with yourself, your personality, your body, etc., in all situations. Understanding that you are a worthwhile person no matter what others may think or say. When you get to the place where you are able to be honest and accepting of yourself, everything else seems to fall into place.

Personally, I had to get to that place for my own survival. I finally decided to love myself and ignore those who didn't care for me, because I know that I am a worthwhile person. If they don't want to get to know the real me because of my weight, height, skin color, s*x, age, whatever, then they are responsible for not having a good, caring friend.

Good Luck.

Answer 3

Most of the time, people just need to spill their emotions out and hear themselves say the problem out loud to figure out the answer, or they just need a little push or a word of encouragement. I know that with me, most of the time i just need a friend to look at me (they don't even have to be listening) and let me talk, and i usually figure it out myself.