Why is life so ****?????

Question

Im 22 and recently had a arguement with my dad which ended up with him kicking me out. its realy upset me i dont ever want to talk to him agen after what hes done. i lost my mom 2 years ago and am still sufering the pain of losing her she was my best frend. my dad has hurt me so much its made me depressed and take it out on the closest people to me. i find it so hard now to get close to people because im scared of getting hurt. im so confused with life and why things happen. wohat would you do????

Answer 1

It is never as bad as it seems. Your Dad and your argument with him isn't  the problem. The problem is with you and your dad's problem with your mom's death. You and him have to come down to a compromise and deal with it!

Answer 2

Sounds like you and your dad are both missing your mom, and taking it out on each other by blaming each other inside.

If's not unusual to feel confused at your age, and not unusual to take out bad moods on the people around you at any age.

The fact that you understand what you're doing means you are 1/2 way to taking care of the problem. You have to make the mental effort to quit taking your emotional issues out on the people around you and do something else with that negative energy. It's time to find yourself a volunteer position to help kids younger than yourself through emotional upheavals, using your own experience to steer them away from the negativity.

Once you have yourself under control, it's time to confront your dad with the truth - you need each other to lean on, not snipe at. You'll probably get along much better when you live apart than when thrown together all the time, and after a cooling-off period, you will be able to speak more man-to-man than before.

You also might consider finding a counselor to talk over the wealth of emotions you are experiencing just so you can put them into the correct context and use that energy for something positive rather than dwelling on the negative.

Answer 3

Don;t take it out on teh closest people too you.

You need to learn dettachment, start thinking positively and love your self.

To do this all is no easy task but it's not suposed to be.

Have fun.

Answer 4

You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and start working on your own life.

If you can't move on from the death of your mother after 2 years, you have serious problems. People die, get over it. Stop living in the past and focus on the present, 1 day at a time.

Answer 5

Life is what you make it.

You're 22, you don't need a relationship with your father and I'm sure your mother would be PO'd that you are still mourning her death.

Answer 6

I believe you should resolve your difference with your Dad, maybe even go to counselling for a while. You remember your mother because you are not in a good relationship with your father and this conflict remind you of her and your lose, Which makes you depressed.

Seek profession help, resolve your problems and remember your mother for all the right reason. She would certainly want you to live a happy life.

Life is tough no doubt about it but you can have to rise to a level to solve Life's problems. So dont give up life because Life has not given up on you ;-)  

Answer 7

Reminds me of meeting this girl sitting outside Euston Station a couple of summers ago.

She had left home.  I told her how if she gets what Jesus died to give her - His Spirit she will have a whole new outlook and purpose for life, better in every respect.

She decided to go back home rather than do the right thing!

Answer 8

Sounds to me like both you and your dad are still grieving. It's okay to be confused, angry, sad, and depressed. But do try to get help if you're feeling so depressed that you can't function, or if you feel suicidal. You can work through this. You'll never fully get over the loss of your mom - but you can move on from it. She wouldn't want you to isolate yourself and sink into serious depression. Just consider that maybe what your dad said or did to hurt you was out of his own grief. Hopefully you'll both eventually be able to reconcile. At 22, it's good for you to be out on your own. Join some groups to help you make new friends with similar interests. Just don't hide away dwelling in your own misery. The thing with your dad will work out eventually.

Everything will come full circle again and things will get better. It's the natural order of things. We all have sucky parts of life and really good parts. You're just going through one of the sucky parts.

Answer 9

Ecc 12:1 ¶ Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth, while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them;

Ecc 12:2  While the sun, or the light, or the moon, or the stars, be not darkened, nor the clouds return after the rain:

Ecc 12:3  In the day when the keepers of the house shall tremble, and the strong men shall bow themselves, and the grinders cease because they are few, and those that look out of the windows be darkened,

Ecc 12:4  And the doors shall be shut in the streets, when the sound of the grinding is low, and he shall rise up at the voice of the bird, and all the daughters of musick shall be brought low;

Ecc 12:5  Also [when] they shall be afraid of [that which is] high, and fears [shall be] in the way, and the almond tree shall flourish, and the grasshopper shall be a burden, and desire shall fail: because man goeth to his long home, and the mourners go about the streets:

Ecc 12:6  Or ever the silver cord be loosed, or the golden bowl be broken, or the pitcher be broken at the fountain, or the wheel broken at the cistern.

Ecc 12:7  Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was: and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it.

Answer 10

22? Whole life ahead of you, thats all I have to say!

Answer 11

Acts 2:21

John 3:15-21

Romans 1,3,6,10

Answer 12

I'm so sorry about your mother.

You need to stay calm and talk to your dad when you both calm down. Me and my dad are currently arguing on an almost daily basis but we always work it out once we have both calmed down. Arguing when you're annoyed can make you and your dad say things that you don't actually mean.

I can't tell you why bad things happen no one can. but  just know that it will make you a stronger person. I'm 22 and have two kids that I didn't plan but I'm stronger for it.

And learning to trust people not to hurt takes a long time but you just use baby steps, and eventually you get there. It's hard but it's worth it.

Answer 13

Was the argument about getting your own place and a job, by any chance?  I could understand the father's decision in that case.

I'm 19 and I'm out of the house.  And life is pain.  It is a truth all humans learn, eventually.  If it wasn't sooner, it would have been later.

If you don't have a job already, get one, or try.  I know how hard it can be.

Two, find somewhere to live, even while trying to find a job.  You may have to eat some humble pie and ask your father what to do on that subject.  And you should also try and make up, and actually try to not be so upset with him.

And when all else fails, option C: join the military.  They'll take care of you.  Sort of. *evil grin*

Answer 14

The pain you feel from your mothers death is a profound pain that is to you, your mother, and God alone.  Our parents teach us everything, hopefull this includes how to die.  

Can't do much about your living arrangements, but I can give you a tip I used when I lost my daddy.  I'm kinda an exercise freak ... so, I found myself walking lots.  Each good thought I lifted my eyes to heaven to store the good there ... and when I came across the bad stuff ... well, I scraped my foot to indicate that I'm burrying the bad stuff.  

With thanksgiving, you can get through this!!!

Answer 15

Turn A New Leaf I Suppose, Get A Different Job, Stay Away From People Till They Start Missing You I Suppose

Answer 16

Be alone until I calm down.  Not seek help from the internet.

Answer 17

Pray.

Answer 18

Be strong and believe in your self. my dad used to lock me out.

Accept that things will be tough for a while,but you ll emerge a fine human being.  Yes it does hurt when you get close to people and you get let down. but i ve never regreted being close to someone because that s how i ve learned about people. And the expierience of having close human contact for that time is worth it. Over time you will meet people that stick with you and you with them. This makes the pain worth it.

Go for it and live your life, it s a new and exciting world that is emerging around us. And as you go through life you may see others around you struggle and be there at the right time to offer comfort and respect. Be wary of fools who would suck the life out of you and trust your inner instincts. all the best    rog

Answer 19

Be patient your dad is still grieving for your mum.

Answer 20

If you would only try Love you would destory evil, and that is no lie,

I no of a young man was the same way and he change is father from

evil with love. don't let him make you anger with evil you got to control

your anger. with Love, your Mother is steal there you are the only one to bring her Love out. I will say Peace be unto you in the of Lord Jesus

Answer 21

You're lucky you made it to 22.  If you have a head on your shoulders, you should have a college degree and a job by now.  Walk away, make your life, don't look back and one day, he'll need you more than you need him.   Welcome to the real world!

Answer 22

first try to calm down.then try to go to your dad and talk with him,discuss everything with him because if you search the whole world for someone that loves you more than anything u will find only your mum and dad and as u said yr mum had passed away so donot let the days deceive you and go to your dad before anything goes wrong....believe me after u go to him you will be very happy.

Answer 23

Family is family.  Go out and live your life, go to school, get married.  Remember, though, you only have one father.

Answer 24

You're probably better off living elsewhere anyway.

Move on and try to make the best of your life.

Answer 25

Aw man, that's awful! :(

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother... it sounds like your dad might still be holding onto some anger about it. I don't know him, so I can't say for sure.

Everyone goes through bad things... I know that sounds generic, but they do. It sounds like you have a lot of bad things going on at once... I promise you, life will get better. It always does somehow.

Keep your head up. Do you have someone to stay with now? What are you going to do now that your dad kicked you out?

Do you have friends you can talk with? If you want to talk, my e-mail is always open.

Answer 26

Start fresh.

Tomorrow is a new day, a fresh start, a new beginning.

No one can change my mood or attitude. No matter what "they" do to me.

Life is good. Now start making some plans!

Carpe diem. Seize the day!

God love you!

Answer 27

My beloved mother recently past on to the next phase of her existence also.  Though I am assured that she is in a better place, it still caused me to grieve dearly - still does.  You've been offered some good advice, except from Gly, so I won't bother with much except to say don't give up on your father.  Family relationships are most valuable and precious and should be guarded.

Here's a cyberspace ((hug)) for you.  Keep your chin up.

Answer 28

Life can be hard . Buck up and be a man.  You must keep on keeping on. When I was 22, I had been to h**l and back (viet nam),  been kicked around  quite a bit, been on my own for  4 years , had a job and  was renting an apt. No brag just fact.  Get a job, rent a place and  get on with your life. First prove that you can stand on your own two feet and then go reconcile with your father. I am sorry for the loss of your mother. It is a great loss but you must get on with your life. I'm sure your father is just as sad as you are to lose your mom and you can use this as common ground to start the reconciliation process. Forgive your father for any wrongs you perceive he has done. Remember if you do not forgive others neither will Jesus forgive you.  If you are a female you must still buck up and keep on keeping on. Good luck and God bless.