Why is my 4 year old pooping and peeing himself?

Question

i have 4 year old and an 8 month old so i know it may have to do with the fact that older kids get jealous. that being said: my 4 year old was almost perfectly potty trained (few accidents at night, no biggie). now all of a sudden hes having daytime accidents. about a week ago we put a tv in his room (yes his time with it on was limited). so he was watching it and just decided to p**p in his underwear. not diarrhea though actual turds. so we (father and i) decided maybe it was that he was too wrapped up in the tv so we took it out of his room. the a few nights later as hes eating dinner he pees right there at the table. he got in trouble and stood in the corner and we talked about it. then a few days after that he was at the dinner table again and pooped in his pants. once again no diarrhea. I'm just bewildered as to why he is doing this. we spend time with him, we make sure he knows that he should just get up and go potty he doesn't have to ask. please help me out here any thing anyone knows could be help-full. if its only the jealousy please include the psychology behind the reverting to baby behavior.

Answer 1

You're absolutely on the right track - he's having some anger, and the one thing a 4 year old can absolutely control is where he pees and poops.

If you make sure he knows he's making his own choice you'll just need to wait it out. Prepare yourself for probably a few weeks of mess until it starts to annoy him just as much as you. I wouldn't give ultimatums or put him back in a diaper, because that will just prolong the control issues.

Answer 2

I agree that the new baby could be the reason.  At 8 months old, I am sure that the new baby is starting to get more active/mobile and demanding more of your active attention (e.g., not just nursing).  Also, he may be at the age where he is starting to think his big brother's toys are cool and trying to take them?    He figures that babies have it better - more of mommy's attention, can play with all my stuff without getting in trouble - what is the point of acting like a big boy.  My oldest took some backwards steps when his little brother was about the same age, and I attributed it to jealousy and tried to just give him more attention and also to make sure that we did not let the baby play with all "his" things.  I also made a big deal about him going on the potty - kind of like i did when he started training ("Hooray!  You are such a big boy!  I am so proud of you!  Mommy has to change your baby brother's diapers because he cannot do cool things like you can do...")  Ultimately it is a phase and it will pass.  Don't make a big deal about the "accidents" - just clean them up and remind him that you love him.  

Answer 3

Look at how much fruit he is eating (not the sugar but the salicylates) - limit them to peeled pears only

Look at how much preservatives he is eating in his food (stop with all the supermarket - or what I call party food. Eating fresh food like veges and meats and rice.

Only cook him food for 2 weeks. Cut out anything in a packet for 2 weeks only particularly if he has dry skin

If no change, then move onto other reasons for his behaviour.

You may think this response is odd or I'm nuts but I've answered these questions so many times and I have received emails of thanks so many times.

Answer 4

if he used to be going to the bathroom then it probably is just him wanting more attention. just strait up ask him if he feels like you pay more attention to the baby then him. if he says yes then just arrange a day were your husband takes care of the baby and have a day of fun for just you and your son. it will show him that you care about him as much as the baby. don't forget to tell him how much you love him and show it by giving him hugs and kisses. i hope that helps.