Why is there a link between unattractive males and irritating persistency in approaching/ dealing with women?

Question

I notice I don't have problems with attractive males...they generally know how to 'act.'

Answer 1

Are you sure, it's them? and not you?

You perceive the unattractive males as...well unattractive therefor there advances of unwanted attention are an irritant.  While the attractive male you see it as fun, flattering, and welcome it.

My guess is that the two males arnt acting that different, it's how your reacting to it.

Or...they are desperate...come give em a break.  

Answer 2

Because if an attractive female or any female for that matter isn't attracted to the attractive male, then he moves on and can quite easily find one that is

The unattractive male needs to be more persistent to get what he wants, so he will go after the same person more than once and pretty frequently till either all hope is lost or she gives in and gives him a shot

Its sales 101 and Job hunting 101

Think of the attractive guy like the superstar salesmen who will make where ever he works a ton of money, most places will be beating down his door to higher him and he will let a good looking job prospect walk if they give him too much c**p because two similar prospects that he won't have to work so hard for will take its place

The unattractive guy is a mediocre job prospect so he needs to be persistent when trying to find a job and work harder to get in the door

Answer 3

could it be your encouragement of the pretty boys gives them confidence to approach you

Answer 4

i think it's a matter of perception. if you find the guy unattractive, you'll find his persistence annoying. if you find the guy attractive, you'll find his persistence sweet or exciting.

Answer 5

Maybe they haven't had the confidence or experience of approaching women to date.  

Answer 6

There have been studies on this, and it's actually a well-known phenomenon.

In our society, most people can recognize their own level of sexual and romantic appeal (basically, if you're about an "8," then you know that you're about an "8.").  The difference between most men and most women is, most women are very reluctant to approach anyone they perceive as 'out of their league,' whereas many men will approach anyone they see as having equal or better sexual attractiveness than they do.

So, suppose, for example, that we have a social group of eight people, four women and four men, and each gender group contains a "2," a "5," an "8," and a "10," respectively (using the standard 1-10 scale of sexual attractiveness).  So, in our society, each man is likely to approach women he sees as his equals or betters, while each woman is only likely to approach men she sees as about her equals.  So, let's say you're the "8" woman in this group; you're likely to find yourself hit on by the male "2," the "5," and the "8," while the "10" will probably focus his attention on the other "10."  The result is that you'll find yourself hit on by one man who's about your equal and two you see as unattractive, while the very attractive one expresses more of a polite disinterest in you, which about explains the phenomenon you've been observing.

Answer 7

Attractive men sometimes have the same proclivities; it's just that we don't notice them because they are attractive.  It may also be that attractive men have more opportunities to learn how to deal with women.

Answer 8

that is a GOOOOOD question!!! I mean ugly women don't in general go around flirting as much as attractive women do. So why DO old, bald, fat etc males bother good looking women?

Answer 9

To be fair, I think there is a little bias there. We probably don't mind the attractive males as much... period. After all, they are attractive.

But I think you may have a point. When my current boyfriend and I met in college, we flirted a great deal. He took his cues pretty well from me about what was appropriate in terms of these interactions and thus came across as charming (as well as attractive).

And there was another guy on campus (at roughly the same time) who was not at all attractive, also vying for my attention. He was clueless, irritating, persistent and sometimes downright insulting. As for me, while I never treated him with the warmth I did my current boyfriend (that would have been dishonest) I was kind to him. Perhaps that alone was too much encouragement.