Why is there so much critasizm when it comes to ppl looking for babys to adopt?

Question

me and my family are currently looking for a baby to adopt but all we keep getting is ppl bagging us out about wanting a baby to adopt.We have a big 5 br house in sunny queensland and can provide everything a baby,toddler,or child could want.Its not ppls fault that they are unfortunate and cant have kids of there own.So why do they get called bad ppl?

Answer 1

As you are living in Queensland this is the proper channel to inquire about adoption.  

http://www.childsafety.qld.gov.au/adopti...

You can't just go around asking people if they want to give up their babies, it is not ethical.  If you read the information carefully, you will know that having a 5 bedroom house is not even close to being the only criteria for adopting.

I am surprised this is your first port of call to inquire about adoption.  You sound like you certainly want to take a short-cut.  Australia does not do it that way I'm afraid.  Please educate yourself a bit more.

Answer 2

One: Advertising for a baby on y/a is aganist the TOS guidelines that yahoo has outlined.

Two: Advertising for a baby over the internet can open you up to fraud.

Three: Adoption is a legal process that should be done by legal means only.

Four: If you want to adopt, go thru an respectable adoption agency. Do your research and find the best ones in your area. Talk with other adoptive parents and how they handled the process.

Five: Adopting a child can be long, you have to be patient with the process.

Question: How come you don't want a home study? Having a home study is part of the process, among other things like a credit check.

Anyway, i hope this helps in explaining why everyone gets up in arms about people advertising for a baby on here.

Answer 3

I can't speak to the process in Australia, but in the US, infant adoptions do have some ethical pitfalls.  

Probably the biggest one is: Does this child really need to be adopted?  Would the child's mother be able to parent, if she had a little support?  

There are also issues with the cost of the adoption process, being disproportionate to the services involved.  

Please take the time to educate yourself about adoption, read books from the perspective of adoptees, parenting adopted children and understanding the adoption process.  

Best of luck to you.

Answer 4

Your whole attitude is wrong.

You think that because you have been trying for "ages" you deserve a baby.

You are not entitled to a baby just because you want one.

You are not a better parent than the child's natural parents just because you have a "big" house.  Throwing money and things at a kid is not a replacement for his/her natural parents.

I personally think you should get an education, because you obviously dropped out in third grade by the looks of your spelling.  Maybe once you sound calm and semi-intelligent (you don't have to be super smart, but literacy is a good start) than people may take you a bit more seriously.

As it is, you seem like a spoiled child who isn't getting what she wants so is throwing a temper tantrum in the middle of the store.

Because, you obviously think the internet is a baby store.  

You cannot order a child from the internet.  Babies/children are not puppies/dogs.

Answer 5

I didn't know there was such a an issue with adoption until i browsed the adoption forum in YA, I find it weird that people would look at adoption in such a negative way.. i always looked at it at such a wonderful thing to give a child a mother and father and a mother and father a child..  I know there are some cases where the child gets abused, but that is in everyday life not just adopted circumstances... biological parents abuse their children everyday.. does that mean that the whole world should just not have kids?  I'm sure staying in foster care their whole life is alot worse then having 2 parents who love them.   It really blew my mind to read some of the negative answers... i really had no idea it was looked at in such a negative way.    I wish you the best of luck when you find that special child.

Answer 6

If you are really serious about adopting and are not trolling.

My advice, ignore these people who object. When i was trying to conceive and went on chat rooms where people come to talk about infertility and IVF we had trolls and jerks who shouted at us for not adopting but trying unnatural methods, against GOD's will, not Christian value, yada yada yada!!! Here on adoption i see trolls and jerks attack adoption.

Now as for your method, firstly have you contacted an adoption agency and got a home study yet ???? Thats the most sensible way to go and not look for ads in papers and advertise your requirement. Its not right!

P.S- Are you not married for 2 years and under 25 ? I do think you are getting very impatient too soon. You sound very young and impatient.

Answer 7

You've been "searching for ages", but you're not even 25 years old and haven't been married 2 years?  There's part of the problem, right there.

Adoption is NOT, and shouldn't be, about finding a baby for people who want one.  It's about finding homes for children who need them.  Foster kids NEED new homes.  Most babies don't need new homes.  Quite a few of the women placing their babies for adoption at birth would be able to raise their babies just fine if they had just a little support (most likely, they wouldn't need nearly as much as you're planning to pay for the child).

Advertising for someone to give you their child on the internet is predatory.  Simple as that.  Don't do it.  It's despicable, and makes me think you must have very loose morals if you're willing to go to any (unethical) lengths to meet your "need" for a brand spankin' new baby.

I don't believe that you're a bad person, but I do believe that you need to get educated about ethics in adoption, and what it's like to be an adoptee.  It's really inappropriate for many reasons to be advertising online for someone to give you their baby.  If you have any interest in adopting the ethical way, wait until you can meet the requirements and adopt through foster care.

Answer 8

No offense, but when I read your question I have the feeling you think babies should just be available for people looking to adopt them. I also feel like you have a sense of entitlement to adoption just because you can't have kids of your own.

It shouldn't be about you, it should be about the baby.

Answer 9

Wait! Let me get pregnant so I can give you *MY* baby! I'm sure he or she would be much happier living in your "big 5 br house in sunny queensland" than with me, his or her natural mother.

ETA: I'M the one who is stuck up? Hey, I'm not the one bragging about how big my house is. If you would spend some time here (on Y!A Adoption) and really read and absorb what you see, you'd realize how ridiculous your question is. I am so *not* jealous of you, it isn't even funny. What disturbs me almost as much as your blatant feeling of entitlement to someone else's child is your atrocious spelling. Grow up, will you?

babies, not 'babys'

criticism, not 'critasizm'

people, not 'ppl'

their, not 'there'

advice, not 'advise'

answer, not 'awnser'

because, not 'coz'

jealous, not 'jelous'

Answer 10

I wonder the same thing. I really dont understand the media when it makes jokes about Madonna and Brad/Jolie adopting kids. Those kids are close to the luckiest on Earth and will have a much better life now that they are out of poverty w/ a chance to keep shelter/food and get top education.

I see nothing wrong w/ people adopting, in fact I applaud them. They are selfless enough to use their own time/resources to raise a child who is not genetically their's and provide love to them.

People enjoy bringing down others w/ anything they see will make them feel better. If you have the perfect life but adopt and cannot have children they are jealous of everything else so they attack what they can to bring themselves up.

-If your asking for a baby on YA I really can understand the negative remarks. 1st off there are tons of morons on here who hide behind their computers and give tons of negative comments because thats entertainment to the immature people. Its also a little odd as your not gonna find any parent who really loves their baby but just cannot keep it agree give their child away online to someone they cannot see or know. There is a lot of competition for babies but it is easier to adopt a foster child who is already in a home.  Im not sure about Queensland adoption laws but it does seem like a wonderful place to raise a child. Good luck and keep faith.

-Looking into your laws on http://www.childsafety.qld.gov.au/adopti...

Privately arranged/attempts adoptions is illegal so proceed w/ care as it states that pursuing an illegal private adoption will jeopardize your attempt to receive a child.

If your not over 25 and are a relatively young couple then Id suggest being patient. Those guidelines are in place for a good reason. Young couples divorce at a higher rate, while Im sure you are the exception following the laws are crucial to adoption process. If you are a happy couple enjoy being so together w/out the child, this will make you more stable and less dependent on the child to keep you together.  When you both meet the guidlines Im sure the wait will be worth it.