Why?!?!?! is what i thought

Question

Okay;; i know i might be in love with the jonas brothers and stuff but, my reason i like them is because they are clean and honest. But im not gonna talk about JB, so all u haters wont be leaving rude things. but, here's my life:

I moved when i was 9 going on 10,

i had a best friend in the whole wide world named maggie,

she meant everything to me,

we grew up together,

i moved cause of my dad's job,

and I was shy and didnt want to make friends,

music: screaming in every song.

i wore black and painted everything black and i cried,

the cuts were hurting and my heart was always broken,

my itching got worse,

i itched my body and i bled and cuts were everywhere. my legs were pale with red and cuts.

my life went down the drain,

i hated life,

i disobeyed my parents regularly,

and things weren't well,

emo was me,

and Hawthorne Heights and Armor For Sleep made me fall asleep every night,

my habits were lazy,

my heart was sinking,

then ever sense my grandma had her stroke for 3 years she couldn't walk or talk, i grew up next door to her. she was really close to me,

i loved my grandma,

and i saw other girls in school bringing their grandmas to school and i cried. my thoughts were on depression.

My darkness grew.

She soon was in the hospice,

and the day before she died,

i held her hand and told her it was okay to die,

then, i sang her favorite song through my crying,

she smiled at me,

my mom said that tonight she might fall asleep and rest,

so i woke up the next day and she was dead.

i cried and cried.

i threw up that night.

Things were worse and worse,

my schoolmates encouraged dating,

and that was bad,

i got my heart briken so many times.

and through all this *Lexi* was my hero from then on.

i thought suicide,

but then i thought to myself,

there's so many people who would miss me,

so i changed everything and i became myself,

and i cleaned up my attitude,

now my life is better,

it was tough.

but anyone who wants to say anything about this go ahead.

:)

Music is my medication.

Answer 1

That was interesting. So your life started spirralling downward because you moved.  Why do all emo poeple like hawthorne hieghts. But i am sorry for your grandma and mother dying.

Answer 2

What's the freakin' question?!?!? All i read was "blah blah blah"

Answer 3

I think you went threw an emotional phase in your life, men I was there too, but it's nice to see that you changed :)

Answer 4

Look in you local phone book under "churches."

Find a Church of God in Christ church and start attending.

Once you develop a firm foundation you will truly be on the up and up in Jesus who will never bring you down!

Answer 5

wtf is all this about?????????????????????????

i just scrolled down to the bottom........

Answer 6

I don't get it, what did that have to do with the jonas brothers intro you wrote?

10 is so young to already be thinking about suicide, good job getting everything back together.

Answer 7

write an autobiography why dont you

Answer 8

I want to congratulate you on getting your life back on track regardless of all of the hard times that you went through.  That is wonderful that you cleaned up your attitude and changed everything around for the better.  Music is a good medication.  Good luck!

Answer 9

ur strong!

Answer 10

thank you for posting this....

whenever people ask me how things are going with me, I always try to say with earnestness: "it could be worse" and I really try to mean it...but your post has given a whole new meaning to my usual response.

I hope that people who feel they are victims and choose to wallow in self pity...believing that life is hopeless, will read your words. Tanks again.

Answer 11

Whats the point of this? Its not even a question.