Why she doesn't stay asleep?

Question

My almost-8-month-old sleeps while I bottle feed her. She is soo asleep, it looks like nothing can wake her up. But, when I put her in her crib, she wakes up, stands up, and cries, and does not go back to sleep for hours. Right now, my husband is with her so I can have a break. This has been going on for almost 2 weeks. She wakes up a lot during the night. She used to be a better sleeper. I don't understand. Is it separation anxiety? Have experienced this?

Answer 1

Proud Mommy has good suggestions.  I too had a daughter that would wake up and wanted mom.  My husband and I were getting exhausted.  What we did was go into the room, but did not pick her up.  We laid her down and talked quietly to her, even sang to her and rubbed her back or tummy until she calmed down.  When she was drifting off to sleep, we would leave.  It took almost 2 weeks, but she finally learned that mom and dad weren't going to pick her up and give into her crying and whining.  She would wake up and play with a toy we left in the crib for her or she would talk or sing to herself and then finally fall back asleep.  These parents that run into the room everytime the child squeaks and pick it up and fret and stew about the child not sleeping are causing their own problems.  It does not hurt the child to fuss a bit.  

Answer 2

She could be teething. Im going thru the same thing right now with my 9-month old. She wakes up constantly screaming. try giving her some baby tylenol, and walking around with her or rocking her to sleep. It seems to work most the time with my daughter.

Answer 3

I had the same problem with my little one when she was that age too. It is separation anxiety and yes it will get better when they get older. Just keep with what you are doing and she will soon get to sleep. My doctor told me to try this: When she gets up after you put her down and she starts crying pick her up without saying a word and put her over your shoulder until she stops crying and goes limp like she is asleep and then put her back down. It took about 2 hours of doing this the first night but she finally got so tired and just fell asleep. The next night it only took about 3 times of doing this and she went straight to sleep and then the next night we could just put her in her bed awake and she would fall asleep. Good luck, I know its nerve reckoning but it will get better.

Answer 4

it because she wants to be with you..she is snuggled and warm when your holding her, therefore when you put her down, she wakes up cause all that is gone.  some suggestions would be for her to sleep with you, make sure she is wrapped in a warm blanket, or last but not least, let her cry it out..that IS ok.  sometimes it has to be done, and honestly, they sleep better afterwards and learn to soothe themselves.

hope this helps and good luck..i definally know the feeling.

Answer 5

She is falling asleep in your arms, all nice and warm and cuddled up with mommy.  Then, she wakes up all alone in her bed.  How would you feel?  It's like falling asleep with your pillow and blanket and then having someone jerk them away from you.  

Try the Ferber method?  It worked great for my baby, although we did it at 4-5 months, I think.  It works like this.  Feed your baby and put her to bed while she is drowsy, but not asleep, it is very important that she be AWAKE at least a little so that she is aware of the transition to her bed and of the fact that you are leaving her in her room.  She will probably start to cry.  Go out of the room and out of her sight and start timing.  Let her cry for five full minutes.  Then, go in the room.  Do not pick her up.  Your purpose for going back in is simply to let her know that you are still around and that you have not abandoned her.  If she cries louder when you walk away the second time, don't worry, it's expected.  This time, let her cry for 10 minutes before you go back in.  Again, don't pick her up, just pat her a little and let her know that you are still there.  Walk back out.  15 long, miserable minutes this time, if she's still crying, repeat above.  Then, you go in at 15 minute increments for as long as it takes.  She will eventually go to sleep on her own.  An 8 month old baby is very capable of soothing herself to sleep - with some practice.  You may have to do this for a few nights, but hopefully the number of times you have to go in will get shorter and shorter and then stop completely.  I recommend starting this on a weekend night.

I have an 8 month old and I put her to bed awake, walk out and close the door and she lies down and goes to sleep on her own.  It wasn't easy getting to this point, but the Ferber method worked great for us.  Be consistent, that's the key.  Do it for naptimes too.

Dr. Ferber's book is called "Solving Your Child's Sleep Problems."  I highly recommend it - it gives more details and rationale.