Why some people think older women are less?

Question

I am in my late 30's I am in love with a woman that is over 50. She is amazing, but I have found that people belittle older women. What breaks my heart is that this influences her self.esteem and this creates walls between both of us.

I find her a wonderful woman, but I can't reach her, she doesn't believe me

Why she is pulling away? She says she is less because she is not young anymore

Please I want to understand

Answer 1

There is nothing wrong with older women.  The age difference, while insignificant now, may become more difficult as time moves on.

She probably recognises this and may be pulling away for that reason so that you will not become disappointed in a few years time.

Answer 2

It's so much a matter of perception.  I just had my birthday yesterday(35th) and feel past it & a bit lost, but to someone older, I'm just a kid.  Physically, I feel alot of pressure to look good but know that I'm no match at all for a young 20 something that has no kids.

Maybe your lady has been hurt in the past or feels a bit insecure about herself, in that she may feel that you might compare her with younger women with perfect flat bellies, perfect b*****s, no wrinkles, etc and she may feel that she's not good enough or could be a bit shy about the possibility of a relationship where you may see all of her short-comings as she may see them in her mind.

Just be patient and hang in there, reassuring her of your devotion to her and hopefully eventually, she will come around. :)

Answer 3

Merlin, I can speak for older woman.  I think there is a time as we age when we adjust to being older.  During this time our age is a major factor in our self-esteem.  We see our attractiveness and even our sexuality as being over.  We see the "end" in sight and think of sagging bodies and lack of vigor.

Some of us can move past that and realize that our life experience has added to our attractiveness and sexuality if our health and body are still in fairly good order and can get away from the concept of youthful attractiveness and see that there is a new and different sexual us that is simply a refinement of younger beauty.

Answer 4

Just my opinion.  Man will never understand women.  lol  Second,maybe it is not so much you--and you being younger.  Maybe this is rejection from the past.  I seem to have always been attracted to younger men--but I would feel insecure--mostly from past experience--not totally from the guy I am with at present.  Does that make sense???  Past rejection can affect some women all of their lives--and especially if they are a rung in social status below you or above you.  Weird??  Yes  Just keep trying and good luck.

Answer 5

I don't care what anyone thinks. I think life should get better, the older and wiser you become. I hope I am more confident as an older woman than I am now.

Answer 6

You need to prove to her that what others say about older women is completely irrelevant. She's beautiful to you in all ways, and that's what counts (as well as what SHE thinks of herself).

Answer 7

Society is always cruel. But she must know that you are not them. Tell her from your heart how you feel. Re assure her of all her assets.Always make her feel good.Tell her you are the only one that counts. She does not want to be hurt by another relationship. I believe she has had bad ones. But don`t bring up past experiences. just be patient with her and trust one another.

Answer 8

Society places to much emphasis on young being valuable.  Count yourself lucky you had time with an amazing woman.

Answer 9

Some people think older women are "less" because they are shallow minded and only think about comparing women to the idealized "perfect, beautiful, s**y woman at her physical peak" and most of the women they hold as being perfect are skinny, young supermodels or actresses who spend most of their time perfecting their appearance.  

True beauty comes from the inside as you apparently know.

Answer 10

People who are insecure with themselves belittle older people; older women specifically. We live in a shallow youth-culture still soaked in sexism.

Pay no mind to shallow people who say otherwise. They are not worth your time.

I am in my late 30s, my guy is in his late 20s, btw.