Why such a emotional change during a relationship break up?

Question

How come when someone you love (or at least are still intereted in) breaks up with you. You can go through such a change of sadness and lonliness missing the person for a few days, to anger and not caring the next few days.

It's going back and forth for me in like day cycles and im getting very frustrated! Thanks for your help

Answer 1

Ending a relationship is like losing a limb - you have to learn to do things all over again by yourself.  You go through all the stages of loss due to the "death" of the relationship.

Eventually it gets better.

Answer 2

There are, according to a very accepted theory known as the Kubler-Ross Model, five stages of grief. And when we lose someone we love, it's like a death. We grieve.

The stages are:

1.Denial: This isn't real, she'll come back.

2.Anger: you know what, s***w her for doing this to me!

3.Bargaining: I'll do whatever, just come back.

4. Depression: Oh my god i miss her i can't handle this.

5. and acceptance. where we can accept the loss and move on.

The stages don't always happen in order and may happen more than once or in cycles, like you are saying, but generally we experience a little of all of them until we get to acceptance and move on.

And i'm not saying you are, but if you are drinking to deal with it, it takes MUCH MUCH longer to get better! I drank for like two years after a girl leaving me and didn't get over her for two years, nah mean?

Stay up.

Answer 3

Breaking up with someone can be emotionally and physically draining.  You will experience anger, loneliness, sadness, happiness (seeing that your OK after the break up) and I PROMISE, those emotions will NOT be in that order. One day you will feel fine, and the next day you will feel miserable. What i suggest you do is try to do things that you ENJOY doing that maybe you couldn't do while you were in a relationship, take some classes at the local gym,go out and mingle with new people.  But, its okay, to feel lonely, everyone goes through it, because your routine of being in that particular relationship, is disrupted. So just keep your head up and know that with each day it does get better. But, allow yourself to grief for MAX 1 week and then let time takes its course.