Why won't any1 say my daughter will look like me? am I overly sensitive?

Question

well not everybody but but just my bf's side of the family and him. first my bf has this joke where she will look like his brother a female version which he knows irritates me bc his brother and I haven't gotten along well in the past then his brother later said that from the ultrasound scans she has the profile of their mother (wtf? it's an u/s scan for crying out loud!) and then last night my bf and I were visiting his grandma who will be our baby's great grandma and she said that our baby could come out looking like her or her mother or her dead husband even and of course not at all like me she didn't mention even though I am the MOTHER. I know it's silly 2 get mad about but I feel like I deserve some credit as I am her mommy and have been carrying her all this time! I realize ppl are just excited and his grandma loves her already which I appreciate but at the same time I wish ppl wouldn't forget I am the mother and she will most likely look like me. am i over-reacting?

Answer 1

I wouldn't worry about it too much if I were you. My mother and I look so much alike that I practically never get to introduce myself anywhere, everyone knows who's daughter I am! Of course, you're her mother, she will most likely inherit many of your traits and features. I'll bet that after she's born and is old enough to look like more than adorable wrinklyness you'll be showered with "Aww, she looks just like you!"

Good luck with your new baby!

Answer 2

wow ur a little creepy

Answer 3

Just smile and say if the baby looks like your bf then it will be a beautiful baby.  Don't let their words get to you.  Nothing they say will affect how the baby looks anyway.

Answer 4

No no i nkow exactly where you are coming from....i just had my son and he looks exactly like his father, you can def. tell it's his son and his father does nothing for him...hasnt even seen him in two weeks, and before that 2 weeks....ugh anyways...my son was born with black hair and it is really light...getting to be blonde like mine and EVERYONE on his side his always like OMG HE LOOKS SO MUCH LIKE, OMG HE'S LIKE A CLONE, OMG IT'S MEMORIES ALL OVER AGAIN, OMG OMG OMG.!!!!! ugh honestly i cant stand it. MY SON IS GORGEOUS dont get me wrong! but now that his hair is getting light, his mother has the nerve to say...well that's because "my father has light hair, it runs in the family" like god forbid it might be because I HAVE BLONDE HAIR AND IM HIS MOTHER!! i mean maybe it wouldnt bother me as much if i wasnt his single parent....but he has my lips too which i just love to kiss so so so much lol. and no she wont most likely look like you....you never can tell. But i hope she does ;]

I think maybe it's just the way the other side of the family acts...idk everyone wants the baby to look like them.

Answer 5

yes you are being WAY overly sensitive and the fathers family is being WAY overly insensitive. The baby isn't even born yet!!!!!! Who cares what she will look like? (as long as she is healthy) You will all love her whether she looks like you, your mom, your bfs mom or your bfs grandma or whatever. Everyone needs to get their priority's straight, be more focused on if the baby is healthy or not, not on her looks!

Answer 6

I think you are going through hormone h**l and everything is getting on your nerves. From my experience your baby will look like you for your side of the family and like him for his family,  but in reality she will look like both of you. My daughter is 14 now and hates it when people say she looks like me, lol but she also looks like her dad.

Good luck honey, take all the pain relief going, x.

Answer 7

She may look like them now, but when she grows up, she'll probably have some of your features. And probably some of your characteristics too :)

Answer 8

Well my biological daughter looks nothing like me.  Not even a little bit.  She is blond and blue eyed and fair. I am dark eyes black hair, olive skinned.  She looks everything like my Dh father's family.  So you never know... but then again, neither do they.  My bet is that they are saying this to bug you and you are letting it.  So relax, in a few days no one is going to care about this pettiness.

Answer 9

Why does this bother us so? I have some of the same reaction when my mil talks about one of my girls acting like this or that relative or looks like this or that family member. And the truth is, my youngest does look more like my husband's side of the family. And it doesn't bother me as much as when one of the kids are behaving badly and then she says they remind her of some uncle or other. But it does bother us, it feels like I'm in some sort of competition to remind them the kids are as much a a part of me as him.

I do wonder what my mother used to think because truly, I do not look anything like her side of the family. I really do look like I could have been cloned from my dad's DNA.

Answer 10

Well, just remember it's coming from his side of the family.  I've noticed that everybody on my side of the family says that my daughter looks like my sister, and everybody on her mom's side of the family says she looks like her mom.  I think it's just because we can remember what our family looked like when we were all young so it's easier to relate to that.

I wouldn't worry about it.  Now if everybody on YOUR side of the family was saying the same thing, then you might have something to worry about.  Also, be careful not to turn the baby into a competition.  Trying to see who the baby takes after the most can really hurt your relationship with your bf.

Answer 11

..who cares who your daughter looks like, why would they feel the need to mention that she will probly rersemble you, its pretty obvious, you are her parent

Answer 12

When I was born, I looked exactly like my dad...The black hair and eyes and all. However, I am now 24 years old and I found a picture of my mom when she was around my age, I am a spinning image of her...same face, similar smile, same figure same everything. I think when a baby comes out they actually do tend to favor the fathers side, however as they get older they tend to grow into their mother, especially a little girl. That's why you hear a guy can know a girl is going to look like when she gets older because you look at their mom. Its just the way it is. I think you are probably just very hormonal, uncomphy, and ready for this kid to come out, and any and all is getting on your nerves it OK, calm down.

My sister's kid do NOT look like her, besides her oldest is a Blondy and dad isn't. Besides that, spinning image of dad..same with the younger one.  However, the oldest's personality is EXACTLY like my sister's at the same age. So her looks are daddy's but her personality is mommy's.

Even if a child does favor one parent over the other in the looks department, they're both of your kids, there will be things that you and your side of the family will see that that favor you, they may be subtle, and you may have to pay attention, but there will ALWAYS be signs in  your child of each of you.

Answer 13

i would be the same, when i had my little boy all of my ex family were like oh his eye's his just like dad nan aunty bla bla effing bla.  i did get stressed just like you, and i do get paranoid even now that my son's 7 that he dont look like me, but my fiance tell's me the truth, he say's he has your cheeks and a bit of his dad's eye shape but he mainly looks like me.  just smile and nod your head and just remember its them who are insecure and she will look like you im sure. :-)

sparklel21 35 weeks pregnant :-)