Why won't my 13yr old son do what he is told, when it's his mom doing the talking?

Question

He has been basically coming and going whenever he finds fit. . .and I am being ignored . . .but not his dad...yet his dad is the abuser in our family. (why must he pick sides, parents should be treated equally)

Answer 1

BAD PARENTING SKILLS!!!!

google: parenting skills

and do something to HELP your son for a change!

Answer 2

Have you ever tried having a one-on-one talk to him about this? Maybe he listens to his dad because he is afraid that his dad will... abuse him or something if he doesn't.  Also it might be part of the whole teen thing.  

Answer 3

talk to your husband and tell him that you can't pull off this bad cop good cop thing..it is obviously NOT working!

Answer 4

he is followin his dad. he has learnt the behaviour ova yrs an yrs of abuse an y shud he listen to u wen his dad dnt. u cnt do anttin to change him unles u take his dad out of the equation othawise it will neva change

Answer 5

If your son has seen his father get what he wants out of you, there is a very high chance that he is choosing sides for that reason. He is learning from his dad(in his own way) to get his way. Does that make sense? Some poeple will mention therapy for him but don't do it. He will think that you think there is something wrong with him, when you should instead love him for who he is. Instead try family counsiling, this way its not about him, make it sound about you. You want to go, butwant to take  him so you can understand how he feels. He may just begin to feel closer to you in a way that he won't feel so parented by you. Goodluck!

Answer 6

He's 13....Your a mom...Hmmm?

13 year olds DONT like their moms either way.

Usually the dad will let them do whatever but the mom will try to get them to do the right thing.

And soon when he needs you both and he decides he wants to come home but he realized "Omg my parents arent here?!" He'll know you're not just going to sit at home everyday and wait for him to come home.

Answer 7

well most 13 year olds dont listen their teens and think they kno everything... but if u always let his dad be the one doing to disciplining then y would he take u seriously sound to me like u are going to have to do something cuz u never kno wut will happen in the future and 1 day h**l wish that he did listen 2 u

Answer 8

if his dad is an abuser and he has or is abusing you and you allow this to go on in you life and your sons life...then your son has no respect for you so he will continue to do what he wants to do...