Why won't she just go away?

Question

Husband of 20 Years had an affair that lasted for one year. He ended the affair and told me about it claiming that he couldn't live with the guilt. That was 6 months ago. He owns his own business in a small town and the other woman lives there and is constantly driving by at 2 mph staring. This really bothers me. She has stopped by to see if they could resume their relationship and he keeps telling her no. Why won't she just go away and leave us alone?

Answer 1

I think all of these answers are good. Confronting her with him beside you, and if he can't do that, then do as Gretta did and call her and arrange a meeting. The main thing is, don't let it bring you down any more than it has. Twenty years is a long time and he is surely kicking himself in the butt over this. And keep reminding yourself of all the people who love and like you.....:)

Answer 2

She probably is just still in love with this man. Make sure he really tells her that he wants nothing to do with her.

Answer 3

Confront her with your husband next to you, tell her that you want her to leave you both alone, that there is no hope for her.......If that doesn't work....

Tell your husband that you are going to get a TRO served on her....AND DO IT!!  

Does this woman go to a church???? GO and speak to HER pastor, tell him you are trying to save your marriage, then ASK HIM to go and speak with her.

Do NOT let life happen to you,,,,,take control of the situation.

Answer 4

Because he drives by her house at 2 mph gawking.  They have a love connection.  Tell him to go to her, you understand and make sure you get the biggest piece of the pie in the divorce.

Answer 5

You pore thing this must be terribly annoying. This lady obviously still has emotional feelings for your husband and is having trouble switching them off.

   I have had a situation quite the same and I actually phoned the lady in a polite manner asking her to meet for a coffee. We did and it actually went ok, She did still have feelings for my husband still and after talking for about half an hr she broke down in tears realising how silly she had been and also seeing that there was going to be no way of her being able to take away all my husband and I had by trying to replace it with her affair. We said good bye and that was 4yrs ago now and the last I heard through a mutual friend she had moved away.

  Your husband obviously still wants things to work out with you so try not to get angry at him because if he had wanted to be with her he would.

  Good luck to you and relise that what ever happens you WILL be fine.

Answer 6

Tell your husband how you are feeling and ask that, since this is his doing, he have a final talk with her and lets her know exactly and as straight-forward a way as he can that this is over and if she continues there will be legal repercussions.

She is obviously hurting too and maybe doesn't want to believe it's over, so your husband has to do right by all and be as brutally honest as he can because his first love and duty is to you.

Answer 7

sounds like a "FATAL ATTRACTION" to me

get a restraining order

good luck