Will I be/am I messed because of what my father did to me?

Question

Okay, so-- it started when I was about ten and I was left alone with my father because my mom was in the hospital. I remember him saying "You know, since your mom isn't home maybe you could (he made hand motions) -- you don't even have to look at it!" I didn't know what he was talking about then, but I know now that he was implying to a hand job. I ignored it and went up to me room. When I turned 12 it got really bad. He would force me to cuddle with him and he would grab on to my breast while doing so. I tried to push his hand out but he kept putting it back up. Once when he did this he leaned over and said "are you going to give me some?" and I said "What?!" and got out and ran to my room. I didn't tell my mom because I knew she would leave him and we wouldn't have anywhere to stay. So, I avoided him at all cost for a week and then he started acting like nothing ever happened. So, I tried to and am still trying to block it out of my memory but almost everyday it creeps into the back of my mind and makes me sick. What is this going to do to me? I know I need to get out of my house asap but should I seek help once I turn 18? I'm 17 now.

Answer 1

i think you should seek help right away or call the police or talk to a counseler or something but that is just messed up things like that lead to suicide

Answer 2

Call the cops!!! Get out now!! My dad did that to me and its not worth staying in!

Answer 3

You need to get out of there now. You need to go get therapy, present this information to a court to get emancipated. You cannot live with someone who did that to you.

Answer 4

call for help. police. that is the best thing to do at this point for you own sake and your parents.

Answer 5

I think you should speak to someone at school (A counselor ) who will tell you what to do, but clearly you must simply not allow your dad to behave this way towards you.  If he approaches you again, say: "Dad have you no shame and have you any idea what will happen to you if I report you to the authorities and believe me try and touch me one more time and I will go to the police and lay a charge against you!"  Become bold and stand up for yourself.  If he threatens you say: "Well since you are now threatening me I have no choice but to do something about you.  You have chosen this course so now maybe its time for you to face the consequences of your choice. You ever lay a finger on me and I WILL do something about you!"  He might come back with a wingding to try and throw you but believe me he will get the fright of his life and perhaps you should do this when your mother is around so that she can know whats been going on! Don't allow fear to cripple you.  You are 17 now so you can stand up for YOU. I had an uncle who fiddled around with all us girls and even our cousins.  I took the bull by the horns and confronted my parents with the situation.  May dad didn't want to believe me because it was his brother but my mother did.  I even went as far as to tell my grandmother about this abuse and she was mortified.  Sure my dad yelled at me but I didn't care. I stood up for what was right.  I felt in control again and the situation was rectified.  Years later the very same man committed suicide because strangers whose children he had abused wanted to take him to court.  He never ever laid a hand on anyone of us again from that day on.  Sure he was mad at me and cut me off completely but who cares.  HE got what he deserved.  If your dad threatens you go to a friends house and tell her parents and call the police and lay a charge against him.  Then you tell your mother everything as well. Its time he is exposed - filthy old pig!  How dare he do this to you. He can go to jail for this! He should too! Tell him you cannot believe that God gave you a father who could not be accountable towards his own child, and protect her. Refuse to be negative about this for your own good.  Choose to do what is right and most of all pray.  Ask God to help you with this matter. Sexual abuse is a terrible thing and the authorities frown on  the perpetrators and the law deals with them too. You have the right to say NO and if he does not listen then you do what you have to my girl but don't give in.  If he tries to force you hit him hard and leave the house and seek refuge with a family you know well nearby. Its not your fault he is so dysfunctional.  You are NOT in the wrong here. He is. People like him should loose their male part and be taught a lesson they will regret for the rest of their lives. It makes me so angry! It is selfish and dysfunctional behaviour. In Islamic countries they would be stoned for that.

Be brave and stand up for yourself.  I think you really should talk to your mother about it. He has a reason he doesn't want her to know. Tell her you are so frightened. Tell her you everything.  He doesn't think you will. Show her all the letters too. Copy and save them.

Answer 6

your dad is one sick m**o lol nah you dont have to be screwed up just find a way out tell your mum and if she dont believe you just find somewhere else to stay

Answer 7

you should have seeked help a long time ago. That is never ok for a grown man to do that to a little girl least of all his own daughter its disgusting. Tell someone now I know u obviously care about him because u want him to have somewhere to stay but u also need to look out for yourself in the end this will have some effect on you and ur relationships with men I know this because this happened to my best friend's little sister and father when her sister was 9 and her sister is now 23 and she doesn't really trust men she think all are using her. Which is not true but u may now have that thought in ur head the one man who is supposed to be there to protect and make sure nothing BAD happens to u is the one u feel like u have to be protected from. Whatever u do don't wait until ur 18 get out of the house now and stop it only u can make it stop.

Answer 8

I'm sure anyone would be messed from that.

Answer 9

just visit a therapist

Answer 10

Call the Cops tell someone quick, or with all the technology out there set him up, have a recorder under your bed or where ever so they can have proof. Don't worry about your mom leaving him, worry about YOURSELF for now, you would be really screwed if your mom decide to stay with that sick b*****d.

GOD BLESS

AND YOU WOULD BE BLESS  ALSO BY BLESSING SOMEONE ELSE IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS, MAYBE YOU CAN HELP THEM BY READING YOUR STATEMENT.

Answer 11

What a sick b*****d.

Report his sorry ***.

He is a p e d o f i l e, no doubt about it.

I don't think it'll affect you /that/ much.

I have been molested by a family member and by a man who worked at a store that I visited regularly.

It's normal that you get creeped out when you remember what he did, I do, as well. But if you try to get through it, what your father did to you shouldn't take over your life.  

Answer 12

What you should do is report him to the police, but it would help to have a recording of the incest as some evidence. But if you don't want your father detained in jail for various reasons, such as your mom still loving him, or you needing him to pay for your college fund (it's fine to use his money for your own benefits through college since he's already a crooked man), then just try hard to ignore it for now. Then if you decide you no longer need hsi financial assistance or if your mom quits loving him, then put him behind bars. Does he still do this?  And no you will not be psychologically, and certainly not physically, messed up because of this.

Answer 13

umm i don't think it will mess you up. it might make you a little hesitant to do those kinds of things with a bf or something. but i'd seek help from a boyfriend, or maybe even a counselor. but as long as you get away from him you'll be fine. one of my other friends had a problem like that and.... you know you could get him put in jail or get a restraining order. that way your mom would still have a place. if you want i can probably give you more help. message me if you want.

Answer 14

Something similar happened to me. I live right across from the babysitter that did it in second grade and am now in college. I dont think about the actual event now, but i think about that being the cause of emotional and sexual problems. You definetly need to talk to some one. Not to sound like everyone else, but its not fair to you, and your mom to have to live with him. Trust that everything will be fine and turn him in. I mean, with him in jail, you get to live in the house right? ;) Good luck. Hey if you need to talk email me!

Answer 15

http://drphil.com/

click on be on the show seriously u need it

Answer 16

tell ur mom and if she doesnt believe u leave to a friends house, that is so sad and sick! im very sorry that something like that would happen to u. and while ur at it report him. i have friends that have gone through this kind of stuff. and although it was hard to report their family members it was for the better. also u should see a therapist or something of that matter. it might not be doing anything to u right now, other than making u sick everyday, but in the long run it prolly will effect u. please just start by telling ur mom or someone that u r very close to and that u love and trust!.  

Answer 17

You need to seek help now,If you can tell your mum,if you can't call a help hot line,blocking out stuff dosent work,you need to see a counsiller.If you seek help you can get past thease things,The most important thing right now is to get your self out of danger,I'm so sorry to hear this is happerning to you,best of luck getting things sorted,and always rember it's not your falt,it's his.

Answer 18

Thats Terrible!  I cant believe how you didnt tell anyone because you were concerned about your mom & him splitting up.  You must have tons of courage.  You should definately seek help when you are 18 if not now.  Your dad should be ashamed.

X

Good luck and if it goes any further, seek help immediately, you will find a place to stay.

X

Answer 19

Ummm tell your mom!

Answer please

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?...

Answer 20

Sick b*****d!

Report his ***.

Tell someone. This could get bad for other people as well!!

Or seek therapy. I mean I know it sounds bad but therapy really helps.

Answer 21

not to be mean, but ur gunna be messed up for life.. u need to hit him with a f uck1ng  baseball bat and tell him to apoligize